Discussion on keeping women around

[gods gift to women]

There isn't much on this site about how to keep a woman around. What do you guys think are the top 5 or 10 reasons a woman will stay with you for a long period of time (6 months or more). Here are some reasons why I think they will stick around.

1. You keep the relationship exciting
2. She trusts you
3. You dont reveal too much about yourself in the beginning.
4. You don't come off as needy
5. She knows that you have other options

Lets here some more ideas

 

[typical]

You give it to them soo friggen good like no other guy has ever before and she feels that she wont ever get another lover like you again in her life ................. meh some chick told me that about her b/f.

 

[gods gift to women]

great answer! there is more to it though. Any other ideas

 

[Phyzzle]

You give it to them soo friggen good like no other guy has ever before

Strangely, I gotta disagree. An awesome sex life doesn't mean squat in the long term.

Personal Experience:

The chicks who really like you will FEEL like you are good in bed.

The chicks who are ok with you will FEEL like you are so so in bed.

How you actually perform in bed doesn't seem to matter much.

 

[Hitman10000]

Sex can be a deal breaker but it is also relative to you having your own life. For instance, Great Sex = FWB but great sex does not equal LTR, if you're asking what keeps LTR , it's really something you do for yourself and the relationship, but not for her.

 

[insanity]

well the guy that lives beside me, i feel so bad for the him. he goes home every weekend and his woman stays up here and anyways last week i heard her getting it on with some other dude. then when the guy got back he brought his woman flowers....if only he knew. i've told people they were being cheated on before and they didn't believe me.

it's strange...she's sticking with the guy who she's cheating on....but she's going elsewhere for a shagging. what kind of interest level is there?

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

...How you actually perform in bed doesn't seem to matter much.

YAH-HUH!!!!!

 

[wayword]

Personal Experience:

The chicks who really like you will FEEL like you are good in bed.

The chicks who are ok with you will FEEL like you are so so in bed.

Yup, a lot of sex is based upon the attraction there to begin with.

Also, I've heard of girls ditching guys even though they said they were great in bed.

On the other hand, I've also seen girls staying and putting up with tons of BS likely just for the sex (e.g. probably Britney Spears).

So, hard to say, ayo..

 

[The Truth]

Let's not forget physical attraction. If she's not all that attracted to you (i.e. you won her over with charm or tactics), then she'll constantly be looking at and fantasizing about other guys.

Another point that a lot of guys here will argue with is that you must treat her well. If you mess her around, flirt or score with other women, verbally or mentally abuse her, then she will feel justified to cheat on you. Women are not loyal to guys who treat them badly. They will only stick with them until a better offer comes along.

Responsibility and maturity is another factor. She must feel that you can handle a LTR. Women don't want to babysit their boyfriends and if you're unemployed, spend your days playing Playstation games and can't take care of yourself, she won't want to stick around.


Anyway, this is a good thread. Not many like this around. I'll think of some more points shortly and might ask my girlfriend for her opinion too.

 

[skip2mylou781]

verbally or mentally abuse her, then she will feel justified to cheat on you o.

LOL i kno u can NEVER get over that mental abuse post by donjuanbynature, but lemme give u my 2 cents - i only have experience on LOSING gf's who id have for months, so i can deff make a gauranteed list of wat to NOT do and a list of wat i THINK u SHOULD do

Keeping a girl/woman:

DONT........

a)show her more interest than she shows u, she'll end up feeling suffocated
b)if shes real sweet to u and says she loves u, DONT play sosuave games with her (****ed me over once when i was too c+f for too long with a girl who loved me, and we ended up gettin into fights but she was a psycho kinda)
c)get jealous EVER
d)yell EVER
e)show her that u NEED her and without her ur life would crumble (typical afc move)
f)SETTLE for any girl, as u will end up unhappy and either cheat, b mean cuz u just dont care, and be unsatisfied


DO

a)**** the shyt outta her every single time
b)make her laugh and associate great times with being with u (anchoring)
c)spend time apart, u go with ur friends, she goes with hers
d)keep her guessing and on her feet (aka keep her excited, drama-filled, and take her on an emotional rollercoaster ride - ANYTHING TO KEEP HER FROM BEING BORED)
e)mentally condition her by playin with her head in a joking way (mental abuse)


e) is just an extreme sort of push/pull

quick example of e)as the infamous donjuanbynature said, pin her down playfully (and ive done this to perfection) while ur making out and show ur DOMINANCE, remind her who the man is and that u can do w./e the **** u want to her and she cant do anytin about it! but then say "u better kno that baby but dont worry ur man wont hurt u, he loves u"

extreme push/pull - she'll b dependant on u with thsi kind of conditioning and wont wanna leave ur side no matter wat

 

[Embrace]

(ignore this)

 

[The Truth]

Skip: I agree with every point you made except for the mental abuse/push pull part. Arguments and moments of insecurity happen in long term relationships naturally, so there is no need to play any kind of games to keep her on her toes.

I don't agree with anything where you purposely try to play with her head or do anything to control her because it can backfire so easily and create negative friction. It might not happen straight away, but women brood over things and she might be walking down the street on her own one day and think "I really didn't like the way my BF spoke to me the other day. I'm not his puppet. I'm going to start standing up for myself. He's not going to talk down to me like that again". And a little detonator goes off in her head and then all of a sudden she explodes.

Or the next time she's talking to a good looking, decent guy, she could start thinking "This guy speaks to me as an equal. He understands me. Not like my boyfriend who always treats me like a kid or his property."

I've known it happen many times.

 

[skip2mylou781]

last 2 girls i did the mental abuse thing - its like they CLUNG onto me and couldnt breathe without me, it created love/obsession to the point where theyd act very AFC towards me AND b really turned on and wanna fvck every hour

1 of them i am still with, the other is the one where all my ****y/funny went too far (but she was insecure)

b4, girls fell for me more for my sweetness but they also would fall out of it fast once that got old/boring for them.

so hey, the mental abuse thing works accorin to that model dont u think?

 

[Distant Light]

Being Unpredictable
If you are unpredictable she never knows what to expect in the relationship, there are different areas you can use this...

Sex wise
- One day you fuvk her
- One day you don't
- One day you quickie
- One day you fuvk and spend the night
- One day you just sleep over, and fuvk in the morning
- One day you fuvk, fuvk, fuvk, fuvk and fuvk until you pass out or run out of water
- One day you you make up a game or play a sex board game
- One day you do some role playing (you know how they have scenes in porno movies where its so chessy and they end up having sex lol)
- One day you bust out a sex book and try the positions
- One day its all about your pleasure and one day its all about her pleasure
- Challenge (Who can get who off first, who ever wins gets a prize, it could be small or big)
- Use some toys
- Video Tape
-Public sex

Ok now with all that you can come up with many more, so now sex wise you have over 15 things that you can do sex wise. Mix it all around and she will never know what sex is going to be like, and assume you fuvk 2-5 times a week depending on if you have fbs on the side etc, you have stuff to do that is different for a month to 3 months str8.

Frame wise
You don't want to keep the same frame constantly most likely its the bf/gf frame.

Add stuff and mix around with it, some examples...
- Your horny for her but yall can't fuvk right now. (Your basically kissing and fondling, at different times when in isolation, and your also sometimes giving SOIs about how hot she is making you and how horny you are, etc, can lead to public sex)
- Your super cool and making everyone feel good around you
- Your socializing with strangers as yall go to where yall are head
- Your quiet and you make her do most of the talking but your still leading mostly everything
- Challenging/Games/Trivia/Bets
- Your center of attention (Invite some friends to tag along with you, and lead the group)

Right there is 6 things the mix around

Hangout Wise
This I think is essential as this is the time that is most important, and that is the places and stuff yall do to spend time together. I have a few things in mind...

- One day she goes out with you to hang with your friends
- One day you go out with her to hang with her friends (I don't really recommend because now she has to lead most of the time but just another idea, and since she is a LTR, it isn't to bad to make her lead once inawhile)
- Double date
- Do something yall both never done before (skydiving, canoe)
- Do typical stuff (Movie, dinner, movie at her place) but mix it up abit, sometimes go to the movie theater close by sometimes go to the one far away, maybe try new restuarants 1 time a week, make a movie night where yall watch movie all day or maybe comedy, scary movie, etc)
- make her help you with something our you help her with something. (example, you both help each other cook, she can help you clean your house, etc)
- Try new things, food, drinks, restuarants, places
- Go on a quick road trip, maybe down to another state closeby just to have alittle adventure and make sure you set goals that way you already know what your going to be doing down there
- Sometimes just doing low key things such as shopping in mall, walk in park or near the boardwalk, etc.
- If yall are really into each other and you and her have the funds fly to someplace or go on a cruise (Don't forget to mix up the sex and stuff, maybe play with her cl!t while on the plane)

Mix that all around and you've got yourself a pretty unpredictable relationship, she will never know what your going to do. Maybe one day yall go shopping and end up going down on her while she is wearing a skirt real quick or maybe you getting head. Or your maybe in a restuarant that yall never tried before, its Russian cuisine and your telling her how your getting horny by the dress that she is wearing and have her rub your divk under the table.

Just be creative and mix everything up, but I think this is the key to a healthy realtionship, and it won't be the same boring sh!t, you go to her house fuvk her and leave, or you go to the club go home fuvk her and leave. Hope this was helpful

 

[( . )( . )]

If you mess her around, flirt or score with other women, verbally or mentally abuse her, then she will feel justified to cheat on you.
Women are not loyal to guys who treat them badly. They will only stick with them until a better offer comes along..

"Loyalty" will keep chicks around? Are you fvcking kidding with this sh!t, you DO know guys who actually fvck chicks read this forum now and then dont you?

I don't agree with anything where you purposely try to play with her head or do anything to control her because it can backfire so easily and create negative friction. It might not happen straight away, but women brood over things and she might be walking down the street on her own one day and think "I really didn't like the way my BF spoke to me the other day. I'm not his puppet. I'm going to start standing up for myself. He's not going to talk down to me like that again". And a little detonator goes off in her head and then all of a sudden she explodes.

Truly pathetic, sure you may be just an AFC caught up in a CHICKS reality but I'm not buying it, I still think your a chick.

 

[The Truth]

"Loyalty" will keep chicks around? Are you fvcking kidding with this sh!t, you DO know guys who actually fvck chicks read this forum now and then dont you?

Truly pathetic, sure you may be just an AFC caught up in a CHICKS reality but I'm not buying it, I still think your a chick.

Go back to your pornography and kleenex. You have no idea what you're talking about. That's why you are single, bitter and offensive. You don't have any friends either do you?

You just like throwing insults at anyone who is doing better for themselves than you. Have you ever considered trying to get to our level instead of trying to drag us all down to yours?

 

[( . )( . )]

Go back to your pornography and kleenex. You have no idea what you're talking about. That's why you are single, bitter and offensive. You don't have any friends either do you?

Yeah youve got me.......again.

Sheesh lady, how far do you think that sh!t is going to carry you?
Seriously your going to have to back up your statements sooner or later with some logic.

Instead of the usual "your just single, bitter and jerk off to internet porn" comeback try some EXPLAINING, and tell us how letting her know your "loyal" to her will increase the chances of her staying? Lets start with that first.

 

[gods gift to women]

thanks distant light. Great info. Any more ideas guys?

 

[The Truth]

try some EXPLAINING, and tell us how letting her know your "loyal" to her will increase the chances of her staying? Lets start with that first.

It's known as mutual respect. If you're not loyal to her, she has an excuse to fvck around. She will even fvck around just to get back at you whether she wants to or not. Men would do the same.

Simple enough for ya?

 

[rsxtreme]

good info Distant Light