"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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Dipping the pen in company ink

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I swore I would NEVER do this again after a horrible experience. But fate doesn't agree.

They just hired some new people, and one of them happens to be a HB. Who will be working my same crazy hours. Who will be sitting right across from me all night every night. And we will be alone. And she made it a point today to let me know she is available.

I'm already contemplating ways to ask her out in my mind. How can I resist?
 

"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."

Attraction runs on a clock.

She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.

The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."

One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.

Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.

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Desdinova

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If you don't want to learn from the first time, what will make us stop you from doing it a second time?

If you've got any evil ex's from your past, make it a point to imagine how it would be working right across from one of them, looking at that b1tch's face day in and day out, remembering how she screwed you over. Then realize that this is how it could possibly turn out for you.
 
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Desdinova said:
If you don't want to learn from the first time, what will make us stop you from doing it a second time?

If you've got any evil ex's from your past, make it a point to imagine how it would be working right across from one of them, looking at that b1tch's face day in and day out, remembering how she screwed you over. Then realize that this is how it could possibly turn out for you.
It's not that I don't want to learn, it's that certain variables are different now. The last time I dipped the pen in company ink (See thread "Does no contact really work?") it backfired because I was a fool and an AFC.

I have matured since then. This chic seems cool and it's not a career, it's a job. What's the harm in letting her buy me breakfast? :D
 
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MacAvoy said:
Live and learn. Do it again, maybe the second time, it will actually rub in.

It's not like I'm going out of my way to get this girl like last time. She is basically being offered on a silver platter. I didn't even try to look at her, but now she will be sitting across from me all night long. I have no choice but to pursue.
 

"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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Gangster Of Love

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If it is being served on a sliver platter, then you wait for her to pretty much make all the moves.
 

blackbelt2k

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I'm in a similar situation, although this will be a 1st time for me. My coworker found me on facebook, i got her digits, we went out drinking. She told me has had the hotts for me since day 1. Kissing, dancing, and she wanted me to have sex with her in public... that was last friday.
This monday, she avoided me, then on tuesday we went out for after work drinks. Kissed and laughed alot. Got a text from her later that night saying how much she enjoyed the evening.

Now I'm not sure if she is just worried she came off as slvt the first time, and is taking it slow. Or if she is losing interest, or what. The date on tuesday, it was like she was doing push and pulls, touching me one minute then pulling back another.

I'm not sure what to make of the situation.
 

foomee

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Vlad the Impaler said:
I swore I would NEVER do this again after a horrible experience. But fate doesn't agree.

They just hired some new people, and one of them happens to be a HB. Who will be working my same crazy hours. Who will be sitting right across from me all night every night. And we will be alone. And she made it a point today to let me know she is available.

I'm already contemplating ways to ask her out in my mind. How can I resist?


You can't do it. It'll just cause problems. Instead try to see her as just a friend and ask her if she has any cute friends to hook you up with. Maybe you two can go to a club or something with her friends and your friends. Just whatever you do she's just a friend no more!
 

MacAvoy

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I think she had a little ASD on Monday especially if you did go through with the sex in public thing on Friday. But I think you probably got her over it quite well when you went out for drinks on Tuesday.

Right now YOU ARE THE MAN in her eyes. Keep it up black. Sorry for hijack, vlad but I know you understand.
 

ezily

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I read an article that said a very high number of people date coworkers. It's not like it's a problem. The problem for you vlad is that you will see her very often. So if things don't work out (or even if they do) you will always have to see her. Now, if you don't have a whole lot of communication with her at work it's different.

I've been in a situation where a coworker basically threw herself at me. I was hesitant at first because I knew she was a coworker. But when she says she needs to repay me for favors and even suggests we go out for drinks then of course I wouldn't let an opportunity like that go by.
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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MaddXMan

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It took 2 bad experiences for me to learn my lesson. NEVER again!!
 

Night Owl

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Nope, Grandma told me: Never go fishing off the company pier.

Wise words indeed.
 

02hero

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If you are happy in your job it's a big no, no...

If you don't give a **** about your job, nail that ***** over your ****ing desk, you will then find yourself looking forward to Monday mornings, also you will go to work with a spring in your step and a huge **** off grin on your face.......if it turns to ****, quit....
 

Desert Fox

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If her tits are bigger than 36 C than FVCK THE JOB AND GO FOR IT BRO!!!

If not, forget about it. FUHGEDDABAHDIT

rofl
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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verysuave

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blackbelt2k said:
I'm in a similar situation, although this will be a 1st time for me. My coworker found me on facebook, i got her digits, we went out drinking. She told me has had the hotts for me since day 1. Kissing, dancing, and she wanted me to have sex with her in public... that was last friday.
This monday, she avoided me, then on tuesday we went out for after work drinks. Kissed and laughed alot. Got a text from her later that night saying how much she enjoyed the evening.

Now I'm not sure if she is just worried she came off as slvt the first time, and is taking it slow. Or if she is losing interest, or what. The date on tuesday, it was like she was doing push and pulls, touching me one minute then pulling back another.

I'm not sure what to make of the situation.
you just got a notification saying "SHE ADDED YOU ON HER LIST"? then went for the number, then asked her out to go for a drink?
 
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I'm going with Francisco's advice and just be a cool cat around this girl when she starts up my hours. Make her laugh, attract her, get her interested, etc etc. But I won't ask her out and see how crazy I can make her..

It should make the long graveyard shift more interesting. It will be a good test because if I can get her interested enough she should do the chasing. Maybe if I play the cards right I can get her to ask me out.

But I gotta admit, it's going to be hard to stick to this plan. When the time comes and she is sitting there it will be hard not asking her out. Especially since we'll be walking out of the building together most likely.
 
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