Difficulty Conveying Coolness and Value

[guittarjedi]

I have major difficulty conveying that I'm a cool person to people that I first meet. It's really frustrating because whenever I'm in a group of people for a period of time (work,school etc...) I usually am considered one of the coolest people who others look up to. It always starts with one guy initiating a friendship with me and others falling in line. I've always been good at getting along with males immediately. Unfortunately I've always had difficulty getting along with females.

Usually, the females see how good the guys get along with me and they become friendly with me. I've never been one to initiate friendships and conversations and my game suffers tremendously because of this.

-guittarjedi

 

[Jariel]

It's a subconscious thing. Maybe you convey coolness to guys and people over time because you relax, be yourself and don't care too much. But when you try to convey it, it falls flat. Think more about enjoying thes encounters with people rather than focusing on what you're doing or what you want to convey.

It's like riding a bike. You ride without thinking about it, enjoy the journey and surroundings. The moment you start focusing on the pedals, steering, directions etc, the journey becomes less enjoyable.

 

[Black_Italian]

Watch James Bond movies and The Devils Advocate concentrate on Milton Bradley (Al Pacino). They both convey coolness. Its all about body language and voice tone.

Ninja out

 

[Jay-X]

when i join a new group, i'm usually considered the coolest guy they ever met and i get approached by other people in the group that haven't spoken with me yet. they all are talking about me and saying how funny, cool and crazy i am. then, after knowing me well, they think i'm a try-hard and they just consider me funny to be with but nothing more