"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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difficult situation

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taiwanesedude227

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I am in a difficult situation and it seems like no matter what I do I can't escape it. I am a 10th grader and although I do have a group of friends at my school, it seems like I am not close to or valued among these friends because I always find that I have to initiate conversation with them, they never start talking to me. I first thought that I didn't really need them and could make other friends, but that turned out to be hard. I find it hard to make friends with other people in my classes because usually they seem to already know each other and start talking to each other and I am just sitting there by myself. I also don't know what to talk about with random people, for example, there is a popular kid in one of my classes that is really nice but when I talk to him we have nothing in common. I try to ask him questions about his sport, which is lacrosse, but I don't even know anything about it so I can't really talk about it. I've read so much and tried applying stuff but I just don't know what to do.
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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Anomalous

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Though break taiwan.

Just start being annoying. Its fun doing it, and then you'll start saying whatever you want because your annoying.
 
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taiwanesedude227

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Hm are you sure that's a good idea? I don't really want to be known as an annoying person either.. and that might become a habit that is hard to break too.
 
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DJ4Real

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Lets just say this. Being different is what starts the best conversations. Elaborate on your differences and you'll have good convo.

No, don't be "annoying".
 
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redbullfbu

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dont be annoying i used to be annoying to all my friends but then one day i was prescribed to concerta :)
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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LesaneCrooks

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I have a similar situation, sorta kinda. A couple of my friends have gotten sent to jail in the past few months (free mcs, tony, etc..), so my group has disapeared. I have a lot of "associates", but not many good friends. Basically, deal with it. The friends u value for life will come out of nowhere, u cant just create them. be patient, things get better as u get older anyhow.
 
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SynapsyS

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The only thing that anyone can really suggest is to a) increase your self esteem and b) as a result, be more confident.

Self Esteem - This is going to sound superficial, but I find that new clothes can boost my self confidence by huge amounts. You have to start believing "It's not me, it's you.".

Confidence - There's a whole lot of stuff out there on confidence, so I won't elaborate. However, it's important.

You should be aiming to be able to just chat to EVERYONE. It can be about anything. You could, say, ask for help on a problem in class from someone, or if you're around the grounds, ask for the time or something, and go from from there.

The more you do it, the better you'll be at it. It just sounds like you're talking yourself out of being confident - just because you're not good at talking to people now doesn't infer than you can't change. Hell, nobody is really born with a silver spoon in their mouth and the conversational skills of Shakespeare. You have to work on it.

Read the bible. Sure it's written for interactions with females, but a lot of it can be applied to talking to just everyday people as well.

Good luck.
 
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