Different approaches to dealing with Flakes/Low Interest

[Firefly]

So I have been meeting a lot of girls recently with quite varied results. I had three that seemed to be flakey/low interest types so I thought I would try asking them out one more time (Hey, it's only a text). I tried different responses with each one - Which was the best?

A. First girl who I asked out to a dinner party on Saturday night. She asked for details (presumably to weigh up her options) said she would have to think about it, and then texted me the next day to say she had to study (on a Saturday Night!). I just responded with an "OK" and left it.

B. Second girl, I asked out to dinner on Friday night. She said she would have to think about it and let me know tomorrow (always a bad sign). I responded by saying "that was fine, let me know tomorrow".

C. Third girl has been ignoring my invites for awhile, but still accepting my calls and telling me she was busy. I asked her out to the same dinner party on Saturday that I invited Girl A to on Tuesday, and she said she could only let me know on Thursday as she was waiting on a new job. She texted me on Thursday saying she couldn't come as she had a party on Friday. I responded by saying she should go to the party on Friday, and then come with me to the dinner on Saturday (trying to be humourous), and she said she had a dinner on Saturday. I responded by saying she was making excuses not to see me, which I was ok with, but I didn't appreciate her wasting my time by not being honest about it.

Which was the best approach? Any definite no-nos?

 

[window]

If they don't show enthusiam and follow your lead from the get go move on. Quite frankly it really doesn't matter what your approach is. If they like you they make it easy for you...

 

[Firefly]

If they don't show enthusiam and follow your lead from the get go move on. Quite frankly it really doesn't matter what your approach is. If they like you they make it easy for you...

Thanks for the feedback! I am not sure if this principle always applies though. I once spent two weeks convincing a girl to come out with me, and then when she finally did, we ended up having sex in one of my favourite bars (classy!). Do people think that window's point is always valid, or is it worth a shot to be persistent if it is a minimal investment of effort and expense? (I tend to do a lot of my asking out via text while sitting on the train).

 

[macallik]

Good topic. If you feel no way about pursuing a girl then there is no real reason to next her. I think that many seducers (myself included) choose to next flakey girls because they don't want to put in any effort if the girl is not doing the same. However, if people approach the situation like you do, expecting the girl to eventually come around like others have in the past I think your success rate might be a bit higher.

However, I think you need to address WHY the girls are hesitant or flaky when it comes to kicking it with you initially. In my experiences it has been due to a lack of rapport or a loss of attraction. Perhaps you could get to know the girls a little better or subtlely show them why they would want to spend time with you (don't tell them outright but tell stories that show you are a fun guy or whatever personality trait they are looking for). After you feel a bit more of a connection then it might be better to go for the date.