"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"

I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.

The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.

Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.

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Did Things Get Different After You Turned Thrity Something?

John_Taylor

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(Hope no one takes this offensively).

This is mainly geared towards older men whom nonetheless pull pretty girls.

When there was a big age difference between you and her, did you act any differently than when you were younger? (please say it proudly).
What's your approach in regards to age differences?
 

"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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davewe

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John_Taylor said:
(Hope no one takes this offensively).

This is mainly geared towards older men whom nonetheless pull pretty girls.

When there was a big age difference between you and her, did you act any differently than when you were younger? (please say it proudly).
What's your approach in regards to age differences?
Well first, your age isn't posted so we don't know what ind of age difference you mean, though from the title I'd assume you are 30 or approaching it.

Do a search and you'll find a ton of stuff here on the topic of age differences.

Professionally, I'm a writer and wrote a comic essay on the issue. Here's some of the strategies I have gleaned from various sources (mostly here):

When a woman asks your age, she's interested, but has some doubts, and isn't sure what to think about the potential age difference. She will look to how you answer to clue her in on how to feel, albeit unconsciously. If you’re lacking confidence about the age thing, take a cue from Ronald Reagan (not from his politics) during his debate with Walter Mondale:
"I refuse to make age an issue in this campaign. I will not hold my opponent’s youth and inexperience against him."

Strategy 1: Make her qualify herself to you.
Never feel awkward about being too old with younger women. Make them feel awkward about being too young for you. Do it playfully with a good dose of sarcasm. You are a mature man full of confidence and wisdom. She is a silly little girl who you can barely take seriously. Allow her to prove her maturity to you.

Hot Babe (HB): So how old are you?
Me: You tell me first.
HB: 27
Me: Wow, you are young. Do you have an older sister?
HB: No.
Me: Young looking mom?
HB: Not exactly.
Me: Well, I normally like more mature girls.
HB: Oh...
After this, she’ll desperately try to prove to you how mature she really is.

Strategy 2: Let her set the tone
HB: How old are you?
Me: Guess.
HB: 45.
Me: Actually, I'm 46. You're pretty close.
HB: Cool
The theory behind this is if you ask her to guess, she will tell you the age she wants you to be. Either accept that number or adjust it slightly.

Strategy 3: Be the charming older man
If you’re significantly older, like I am, then young women often consider your advances "harmless flirting" because you're the charming older man and more of a father figure than a threat. If at thirty-five a guy flirts with a young cashier, she goes quiet. If a fifty-five year old flirts with the same girl, she is all smiles and giggles. A much older man may be initially perceived as harmless. But as you are charming her a certain number of younger women will think, ‘why not?’ It’s become my calling card - “Why not, Dave.”

Strategy 4: Wiseassed sexy answers
HB: How old are you?
Me: Old enough to know what to do and young enough to do it often.

Strategy 5: Literary reference:
HB: So how old are you?
Me: Did you ever read “The Picture of Dorian Gray” (then point to yourself).
If she knows about Dorian Gray, she’ll laugh at the reference; if she doesn’t, she’ll pretend she does by smiling knowingly. Either way, the age question is dropped.

Strategy 6: Attach yourself to a celebrity that you know she would sleep with in a heartbeat

HB: How old are you?
Me: Oh, George Clooney and I have the same birthday.

She’ll practically melt, as now she associates you with Clooney, and if she ever thinks about your age difference, she’ll automatically think about being with Clooney.

Strategy 7: Make her feel great:
HB: I’m guessing you are about my Dad's age.
Me: Ya know, I always think that young women your age get better looking as they age a little.
HB: (smiles coyly) Oh, really? How old do you think I am ?
Me: Hmm, no idea, but you will be a stunner when you get to 25 .
HB: (blushes ) Errr, I hope so.
Me: Let me know when you have that birthday OK. We'll go out
HB (biggest smile) I sure will...thanks.
Whoever said that it is about how you make women feel knew it all.

Strategy 8: Deflect and attack

HB: How old are you?
Me: How much do you weigh?
 

zekko

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davewe said:
Never feel awkward about being too old with younger women. Make them feel awkward about being too young for you.
Honestly, when I've been with women much younger than me (and my girlfriend is 15 years younger than I am), I've never put any thought into it at all. As long as we form some sort of connection, the age difference means nothing to me. And in return, I've never gotten an impression that it meant anything to them either. If anything, my impression has always been that women like mature men. As long as you can vibe with a girl, the age difference is meaningless.

And oh yeah, things definitely get better after 30. There's a recent thread on this somewhere.
As far as acting different with women than when I was younger, I would say I was probably a lot calmer with my interactions with them once I turned 30.
 
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