"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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Did she cheat?

SkillzthatKillz

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Ok so i saw a picture of my g/f sitting on one of her guy friends lap at a club. I wasnt there that night, had another thing i had to go to. I dont know why but it bothers me. Also the way she talks about him somtimes makes me wonder. Am i acting insecure?? Its probably nothing...right?
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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COD

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nothing you can do to prevent someone from cheating........although there are things you can do to make a girl want to cheat.

Lots of ways to spot a cheater..........online or in person.

Heres the thing .......if you close your grip to keep her close, you may squeeze her too tight and she will want to leave. Let me state that again........the closer you get to her the more she want to get away.

Dont allow it to bother you........if you discover she has in fact fooled around with another guy......cut her loose.
 

Metaphysical

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SkillzthatKillz said:
Ok so i saw a picture of my g/f sitting on one of her guy friends lap at a club. I wasnt there that night, had another thing i had to go to. I dont know why but it bothers me. Also the way she talks about him somtimes makes me wonder. Am i acting insecure?? Its probably nothing...right?
maybe she did, maybe she didn't. as long as you spit your contract at her and let her know where you stand about cheating... there's not much else you can do.

if you do catch her cheating, make sure you stand up to your manhood and dump her.:yes:
 

Vice

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Ask her if anything interesting happened that night, and report what she said here.

It's a tactic that I'll explain later. Or just grab a copy of David J. Lieberman's booj "Never Be Lied To Again" and look for yourself.
 

SkillzthatKillz

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Vice-Thanks ill do that tonight and she what she says.

I just want to get one thing clear....after what i told you guys...im not crazy thinking there might be somthing between them. Even if shes not cheating (right now).
 

"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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KontrollerX

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"Ok so i saw a picture of my g/f sitting on one of her guy friends lap at a club."

The equivalent to that picture would be your girlfriend finding a picture of you with your hands on a chick friend's (tee hee "friend" tee hee) t!ts or ass at a club.

What do you think your little lady or any woman with any self respect would do if she found that kind of picture of you that was taken during your relationship together during your night out on the town?

She'd likely go thermo nuclear on you before leaving you or just outright leave you with no explanation or conversation about it whatsoever.

So yeah guys really need to start doing the same and stop questioning the what ifs and rationalizing sh!t in their minds here to hold onto their cheating girlfriend whose oh so hot that they just can't part with her or they're just afraid they'll never get anyone else if they do the right thing for themselves and ditch her.

Your gut instinct combined with your common sense is telling you this situation doesn't smell right so yeah you can ignore all that and continue on putting on your best happy face or you can do the right thing for yourself like any woman out there would do should the roles be reversed.

Your call chief.

And I don't know about the rest of you but in my mind if your girlfriend is sitting in some other dude's lap she's not your girlfriend no matter what she says to you.

That type of sh!t should stop once you and she are in a relationship together.

And I don't buy the BS excuse that I know will be forthcoming from some of the symps on here that its just harmless fun and playing around.

There is plenty of ways she could have fun and just play around without doing something such as sitting on some other guy's lap and yeah she shouldn't even be at a club without you if you both are in a relationship together.

Thats a hook up spot and what does any woman with a steady boyfriend need to be doing there unless its to shop around for your replacement?

And again the symps on here can make excuses for that but then hey thats why these guys are always making topics on here about not trusting their current girlfriends.

They never learn the difference between whats acceptable in a relationship as opposed to whats acceptable in a fvck buddy scenario.
 

In2theGame

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You have to reverse the script. What would your "girlfriend" say if she found a picture of a girl sitting on your lap?? She would flip and call you out on it right? so theres your answer. If i saw my girl on a dudes lap, that would signal to me that she could be doing things behind my back since she doesnt respect me. Come on, Sitting on a guys lap is huge flirting and you have every right to feel a bit upset. If im in your shoes, after seeing that picture, i wont take her or the relationship seriously anymore because thats something a girlfriend doesnt do with a male "friend".
 

SkillzthatKillz

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If i do break up with her, should i tell her why? I gotta be honest that pic is like 99% of the reason why.
 

In2theGame

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SkillzthatKillz said:
If i do break up with her, should i tell her why? I gotta be honest that pic is like 99% of the reason why.
Honestly she should know why, you dont have to explain yourself BUT if you do feel like you should let her know why your response should be EXACTLY like this in a Smooth low tone voice. not in a mean or upset voice but smooth....

"Listen, i didnt think we should be together anymore because obviously you dont respect me." <~~at this point her eyes are going to start watering.. "I didnt like what i saw and i dont have time to worry about BS or why you did what you did so i think you and i should split up so you can do whatever you want and ill go me way" <~~ at this point shes crying a river. and once your done EJECT.



IMHO, you dont need the headaches and head games and wondering if shes cheating or not. You saw all you needed to see and what you saw was Your Girlfriend sitting on ANOTHER dudes lap and for all you know... he got a hard on and playfull grabbed her ass (i.e kino).
The Call is yours.
 

Warrior74

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In2theGame said:
Honestly she should know why, you dont have to explain yourself BUT if you do feel like you should let her know why your response should be EXACTLY like this in a Smooth low tone voice. not in a mean or upset voice but smooth....

"Listen, i didnt think we should be together anymore because obviously you dont respect me." <~~at this point her eyes are going to start watering.. "I didnt like what i saw and i dont have time to worry about BS or why you did what you did so i think you and i should split up so you can do whatever you want and ill go me way" <~~ at this point shes crying a river. and once your done EJECT.



IMHO, you dont need the headaches and head games and wondering if shes cheating or not. You saw all you needed to see and what you saw was Your Girlfriend sitting on ANOTHER dudes lap and for all you know... he got a hard on and playfull grabbed her ass (i.e kino).
The Call is yours.

repped.
 

“The 22 Rules That Turned Me From Invisible to Irresistible With Women… Starting Tonight”

You can skip the expensive cars, the fancy clothes, and the endless gym selfies. Completely unnecessary.

I used to freeze the second a beautiful woman looked my way. Frustrated. Awkward. Watching other guys walk away with the girl while I stood there tongue-tied.

Then I discovered 22 simple rules that rewired my entire dating life. The anxiety vanished. Conversations flowed effortlessly. Women started chasing me for a change.

These rules trigger a woman's subconscious attraction switches. And you can start using them tonight.

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DonGorgon

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SkillzthatKillz said:
If i do break up with her, should i tell her why? I gotta be honest that pic is like 99% of the reason why.
Dongt break up with her yet.. Disconnect emotionally and start dating other girls .. keep using ur girl for sex then dump her when you find a better option.

NOTE: 90% chance she is f'ing him or will very soon.
 

DonGorgon

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In2theGame said:
Honestly she should know why, you dont have to explain yourself BUT if you do feel like you should let her know why your response should be EXACTLY like this in a Smooth low tone voice. not in a mean or upset voice but smooth....

"Listen, i didnt think we should be together anymore because obviously you dont respect me." <~~at this point her eyes are going to start watering.. "I didnt like what i saw and i dont have time to worry about BS or why you did what you did so i think you and i should split up so you can do whatever you want and ill go me way" <~~ at this point shes crying a river. and once your done EJECT.



IMHO, you dont need the headaches and head games and wondering if shes cheating or not. You saw all you needed to see and what you saw was Your Girlfriend sitting on ANOTHER dudes lap and for all you know... he got a hard on and playfull grabbed her ass (i.e kino).
The Call is yours.
Sensational post , wonderfully perfect in every way!:cheer:
 

azanon

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Why the girlfriend? I see a problem before you even started your story that much.

This site teaches plate spinning, not oneitis, and all of its inevitable, associated problems. Unless you're at least 27 or so, I'd re-think this girlfriend approach in the first place.

The DJ's just too damn busy to worry about what 1 of his 15 plates is doing at any given moment.
 

sprint

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don't be so impulsive by dumping her yet. You don't even know if she was cheating. Seriously, how would it look if she did nothing at all. Maybe someone pushed her on his lap. Maybe the guy grabbed her and she wanted to get away. Breaking up because of ONE PICTURE is not a good move. Have you ever sensed anything that she may not like you?

Remember your gut instinct is not always right. sit on this decision and try and bring it up subtly in a conversation and see how she responds.

I know everyone on here is saying to dump her, but that's just way way too impulsive. it was one picture. try to find out more about the situation first.
 

SkillzthatKillz

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Sprint- you got a good point. But i think the fact that shes sitting on some other dudes lap is enough to make me think twice about her. Maybe she isnt cheating. But still everyone i talked to, even out side this site says thats a big no no. She might not even cheat on me,i dont think she has, but still i cant trust a girl who would do something like that.

Its also the way she talks about him. She seems to like him, but for some reason shes with me. Its cool, i do have other girls anyway, so its no big loss.
 

"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."

Attraction runs on a clock.

She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.

The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."

One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.

Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.

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true romance

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My current GF and I have common guy friends, she is very affactionnate so it's common she give a guy a big hug when she see them..I have no prob with that, she treat me with respect and she know the boudaries.

I have some good girl friend that have no problem joking around, not sexually flirting but we do touch ..my GF she see there is no prob..no threat.

One picture does not mean much since she could sit on the lap of a long time friend or she see him like a brother..etc

So don't jump the gun yet..just find out the context...
 

In2theGame

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true romance said:
One picture does not mean much since she could sit on the lap of a long time friend or she see him like a brother..etc

So don't jump the gun yet..just find out the context...
And he might see her as a potential F**k? and trying to play the kino game.
 

In2theGame

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sprint said:
Maybe someone pushed her on his lap. Maybe the guy grabbed her and she wanted to get away.[/QUOTE]

Come on Sprint, seriously that sounds like a girl's excuse. for example:...

BF: WTF? why were u sitting on his lap..

GF poor excuse: OMG someone pushed me on his lap... thats all.

BF: WHat??

GF Poor excuse: I tried to get away...

she might as well of said "I tried to get away but i was too busy being a AW!"
 

SkillzthatKillz

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Yeah i think hes trying to get with her, unless hes gay. Shes way to hot to just be friends with. Thank you guys. She told me once shes not attracted to him ,but she dosent act like it.
 

slickaz

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dude...its very simple..

one day...after uve done bangin her...
when ur in bed....(this is when girls are most honest, coz they think theyve made sensual love to their man..)
just ask her straight up..

its been bothering me a lil..i saw a pic of you at a club on d dudes lap.whats goin on?

dont give her an ultimatum at that point..let her answer..if shes stuttering or you feel its a lie..you can give her the ultimatum..

i cant tell you what you can n cant do...i was always attracted to you coz you were slightly mature than the other girls..but if i was mistaken or you do things that cross the line, dont expect me to be standin around.

this way...2 things..uve just fvkd her which means ur already on a high...so if you leave now you'd leave knowing you got the only thing she has to offer before you left... :)

but!...i also agree with some of the other guys here, it may just be innocent..
We dunno your girlfriend from a monitor, she could be the type thats friendly towards everybody but just stays friends or could be one of the girls one of the guys here has been with...we dunno..

i used to date a chic that was very good friends with my friends possing in pictures and hugs to say hi etc, she used to give me shoulder rubs infront of everybody(she was a proffesional trained masseuse) she used to give it to my girl and guy friends too but i knew she wasnt tappin any of them!

there are girls out there who are just out to have fun and dont see stuff like this as a huge issue.they just live in the moment and specially when pics are taken.i used to have a HOTTTT (9)friend who used to throw her legs over the guys shoulder (havin them kneel) or waist and pull her skirt up..but she never fvkd any of us.lol..then theres the lesbian with the big boobs that pulls her t-shirt up over the curve of her tits when shes takin pics wit a guy and sticks her tongue out clingin on to the guy...but shes lesbo and her 'gf' always laughs at it.lol

on the other hand..he probably had a boner and wouldve gladly bent her over...so i dunno..only you know so you need to ask and get info.
 

"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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