Did I Push Girl Away?

[$kUrOkAnG$]

What's up players,

I'm pretty new to the game. I can get a girlfriend if she's part of my circle of friends or work, but it takes me a lot of time to become comfortable around girls, even if they like me.

There's one girl who I think likes me, but I think I might have pushed her away or given her IOD's. Tell me what you think. This girl works at my workplace, but in a different division downstairs. The first time I saw her, I was struck by how beautiful she was. Tall, thin brunette. She did not notice me. The second time I saw her, she gave me a lingering gaze over her shoulder. The third time I saw her, she not only stared but smiled and said 'hi' to me in a very friendly manner. I was surprised by her warmth.

Then I saw her AGAIN a couple days ago. I was so surprised by how nice this beautiful girl was to me, I just froze up and refused to acknowledge her when she said 'hi.' Then I just saw her like 5 minutes ago. I figured I should at the very least be friendly to her, rather than distant and cold. She walked past me, only to sneak a peek when we were shoulder to shoulder. She kinda frowned at me, and then forced a tight lipped smile when I smiled at her.

I felt silly. I felt like I pushed her away. If you are intermittently friendly and unfriendly, does this upset girls? Did I give her an IOD? I thought push/pull was ok: show interest sometimes, then not at other times?

 

[djSlvt]

She liked you at first, but you showed her how insecure you are by not approaching, so she don't like you that way anymore. Stop your mental masturbation on her, and concentrate on the more important thing, yourself.


There is a lot you can do to improve yourself. PUA is about improving yourself, so that when you meet a girl like that you described you don't fvck up and screw your chances.


You turned her off by not approaching. It's as if a girl was giving you all the signs, and you approach and she's like "fvck you dude, you're ugly."

 

[$kUrOkAnG$]

Thanks, dj. I am here to learn, so feel free to analyze this honestly guys. Does she think I teased her for push/pulling, or does she think I'm chicken now for not amping things up? If it's the former, maybe I still have a chance.

 

[djSlvt]

She thinks you're average. They put you in that basket fast.


It is not important, however, what she thinks. Don't be too hard on yourself, she's just a girl. What you can learn from this is that women want to be approached. Thus, your next step for self improvement is learning to approach, some additional skills such as conversation, body language, eye contact, etc, might be needed before that.

You have a problem with people outside your circle. By pushing your self to approach people outside your circle (not just women), you will change that limiting believe you have, and replaced with something more useful.


I suggest books by David DeAngelo, and all the books he references in his works. Through practice, eventually you will become a PUA. (PUA is a state of mind)

 

[$kUrOkAnG$]

Good feedback, player. Anyone else have thoughts about this?

 

[joekerr31]

im guessing your 16 or so?

its never cool to ignore a woman who says hi to you. or at least it sure ain't going to score you any points.

 

[bob2007]

Good feedback, player. Anyone else have thoughts about this?

Ask her out. What do you have to lose? You don't have her now. She's given you some good vibes. Start some conversations, see where it goes. How's it going? Whats your name, what do you do here at work... blablblala. Go for it.

One time, this girl gave me lotsa buying signals, donno if she was just playing or not, but she was overly flirty. I chickened out in highschool.

Another girl, I had a crush on for many years, she always had a boyfriend, although I'm 100% sure its cause I never asked her out. Guess what, I wait for me to get my **** together, graduate. Look her up, shes getting married!


Not trying to hijack this thread with my crappy stories, but REGRET SUCKS!

 

[$kUrOkAnG$]

^^You're not hijacking this thread at all. It's totally on point, man. I hear what you're saying. I'll chat her up next time. I've got nothing to lose.

Ask her out. What do you have to lose? You don't have her now. She's given you some good vibes. Start some conversations, see where it goes. How's it going? Whats your name, what do you do here at work... blablblala. Go for it.

One time, this girl gave me lotsa buying signals, donno if she was just playing or not, but she was overly flirty. I chickened out in highschool.

Another girl, I had a crush on for many years, she always had a boyfriend, although I'm 100% sure its cause I never asked her out. Guess what, I wait for me to get my **** together, graduate. Look her up, shes getting married!


Not trying to hijack this thread with my crappy stories, but REGRET SUCKS!

 

[$kUrOkAnG$]

No, I'm actually in my mid twenties. But I hear your point. It just comes across as rude if you don't acknowledge someone. Especially after we've both been friendly to each other and put out feelers once or twice.

 

[Throttle]

sounds like you need to work your way through DJ boot camp (see sticky) if you're freezing up around a woman.

my guess is that she correctly interpreted you as freezing up, rather than doing anything so sophisticated as push/pull or offering a challenge. she frowned b/c she's hoping you're not a total wuss.

a more favorable interpretation is that her frown means you have her confused and she's trying to figure you out. plausible but less likely. women have a 6th sense about this stuff. they smell your fear.

either way, sounds like you're way too interested in this chick & will blow it sooner or later if you don't get yourself under control.

 

[$kUrOkAnG$]

Also, I did see her a couple nights ago right at the bar, after work. I was with a few friends, it looks like she was on a date or something, like group of four. She was to my left about six feet away at the bar. She seemed busy talking to her friends, so I briefly made eye contact, but didn't approach her then either. Hmm.

For me, the frown means: "you led me on, and that frustrates and irritates me."

 

[$kUrOkAnG$]

double post.