Did I go too far tonight?

R

Rubato

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Here is a text conservation I had a few minutes ago. I was no contacting a girl HB9 I met a week ago. I'm in a bad mood in general right now because I've had a lowsy day. Here is the gist of the conversation:

I asked her if she was going out this weekend and she hardly had anything to say.

Me: You seem like you're miss talkative tonight
HB: Sorry, I'm actually in bed. Gotta get up at 5
Me: Lame
HB: it's the only time I have to work out
Me: Yea you better not skip that
HB: Can't
HB: Gotta keep this a 10
Me: Haha keep dreaming
HB: You seemed to like it enough last week. Not my fault you can't handle it. Good night
Me: you were social proof and a springboard to another girl's phone number. I'd say I handled things pretty well

My mutual friend texted me a few minutes later

Him: what did you do to HB?!



So. My question is... did I go too far? Bear in mind, this girl is an attention *****, very insecure, and very pretty. She says she NEEDS guys for attention and used me and my friend at the club dancing on her to make her feel good. All of her previous boyfriends have been scumbags. So I figured there might be something to just being brutally honest with her. I definitely got a reaction. I don't feel like I should back down after all of this... but is this the right frame to be coming from, or do I just not get it at all? And I don't want my bro to be pissed at me for being a jerk.

What do you all think?
 

yuppaz

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Ya you went too far. You can't talk about using this girl like that. I would apologize personally. Yup it won't build attraction, but it's the right thing to do.
 

yuppaz

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If you woulda left out that first part of the last text it actually woulda been pretty smooth
 
R

Rubato

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yuppaz said:
If you woulda left out that first part of the last text it actually woulda been pretty smooth
She's been pissing me off (and our mutual friend) quite a bit. She's a very insecure girl who using guys to validate herself. Her boyfriend just broke up with her and she's been even worse lately. She likes to bring guys over to her place, make them think it's a booty call, and then have nothing happen. I'm normally not mean like this but, I strongly believe in the idea that if you always do what you've always done, you'll never get anything different. So I tried something different.

How would you have said it differently?
 

n00bPimp

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Damn dude. You just don't do that a girl, or anyone, unless you really hate them. I would set me ego to the side and apologize, maybe say that i was drunk or something.

How I would've handled it:
HB: You seemed to like it enough last week. Not my fault you can't handle it. Good night
"I was faking. G'night"
 

evansblue

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Ya know, some of these text conversations I read on here are just cringe worthy. You're gonna look like a major loser if she forwards that to her friends.


Let this be a lesson to guys... stop with all this "one-upping". You're so worried about being clever and trying to say the perfect thing. Just go with the flow.
 
R

Rubato

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evansblue said:
Ya know, some of these text conversations I read on here are just cringe worthy. You're gonna look like a major loser if she forwards that to her friends.


Let this be a lesson to guys... stop with all this "one-upping". You're so worried about being clever and trying to say the perfect thing. Just go with the flow.
The thing is with this situation is, I wasn't trying to be clever or anything. Like I said, I was pissed off. I was drunk and in a bad state of mind the first time I was out with her and she used me. When I realized what happened, it pissed me off. When she said that I couldn't handle her, that was crossing the line for me.
 

evansblue

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Alright.

What I would do is cut contact with this chick and then have her accidently see you with another chick who is equally as attractive. Start texting her again and see if she starts to purr.
 

n00bPimp

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Rubato said:
The thing is with this situation is, I wasn't trying to be clever or anything. Like I said, I was pissed off. I was drunk and in a bad state of mind the first time I was out with her and she used me. When I realized what happened, it pissed me off. When she said that I couldn't handle her, that was crossing the line for me.
There's a basic rule in the alpha-male rule book which says "Be unreactive". This is a good example of breaking that rule.
There's another rule that says "Don't take what people say too seriously". This rule was also ignored.
 

LE6END

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Rubato, I actually understand your situation. Been in one eerily similar to your own.

Did you go over board? That's contigent on context. A bit disturbed no one yet acknowledged the girl used you. She isn't innocent either.

Yet, every one who has posted recommended you give an apology---to a girl who expended you as an asset for garnering a pool of attention.

Worst still, you cant ask Rubato to place aside his ego to apologize, then criticize him for breaking fundamental rules of the 'DJ Bible'. You can't have it both ways.

Either you play the game or you dont.

If you do, then apologizing is, obviously, out of the question. So telling him that isn't helping---unless, Rubato, you plan on closing the book with this girl. Be that the case, then apologize away and move on.

However, if you still plan to kick it with this girl, i feel i am going to play Devil's adcoate here, but your reply wasnt any worse than her saying she used both you and your friend for attention. That said, it always backfires to lose your temper. Stay indifferent.

Frankly,You cant much help her using you. Its a loss, brother. The only possible way to win now is to lay her, and disappear. Let her know her "9" status isn't s.hit to you.

Best of luck.
 

Single4Life

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personally, I would not apologize in a serious way.

I'd apologize in a funny, "oh well so what im a jerk but I have a good heart" type of way.
 

HariPoter13

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LE6END said:
Rubato, I actually understand your situation. Been in one eerily similar to your own.

Did you go over board? That's contigent on context. A bit disturbed no one yet acknowledged the girl used you. She isn't innocent either.

Yet, every one who has posted recommended you give an apology---to a girl who expended you as an asset for garnering a pool of attention.

Worst still, you cant ask Rubato to place aside his ego to apologize, then criticize him for breaking fundamental rules of the 'DJ Bible'. You can't have it both ways.

Either you play the game or you dont.

If you do, then apologizing is, obviously, out of the question. So telling him that isn't helping---unless, Rubato, you plan on closing the book with this girl. Be that the case, then apologize away and move on.

However, if you still plan to kick it with this girl, i feel i am going to play Devil's adcoate here, but your reply wasnt any worse than her saying she used both you and your friend for attention. That said, it always backfires to lose your temper. Stay indifferent.

Frankly,You cant much help her using you. Its a loss, brother. The only possible way to win now is to lay her, and disappear. Let her know her "9" status isn't s.hit to you.

Best of luck.
Only good post in here. Let the bitch see your inner jerk, never back down. Neg the shit outta her. Make her cry.
 

Yo'Mama

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Why the **** should he apologise to this ho? I say far worse **** to *****es and don't feel the need to say sorry afterwards.
 

zekko

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NewAndImproved said:
LOL @ "social proof."
I always wince when guys talk to girls using pickup terms.
 

Iceberg

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zekko said:
I always wince when guys talk to girls using pickup terms.
Yes.

And I always wince when I see guys get into these going-nowhere text conversations with girls.

What was the purpose of the texting?
 
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