"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

Read more...

Did I do the right thing?

Rebound Material

Master Don Juan
Joined
May 13, 2006
Messages
816
Reaction score
6
Location
California
alright so tonight...I went to a party with a few friends. This chick I was and still currently trying to get at came. She's honestly a freakin hottie(HB8-9) and you know it cuz when she walked in, ALL the guys were looking and a good majority gave her plenty of attention.

For some background info, I met her during bowling class at our university. Me and her used to chill and during those times we would flirt like crazy. I would have my wingmen watch us during those times to see if I was progressing or not. She'd always call me first, and I honestly dont call her. She gave me drunk phone calls one night during the summer and during one of those drunk calls, her guy friend who was also somewhat intoxicated spoke to me. He was wondering who I was because SHE would always talk about me especially that night. He later snitched her out on me by telling me that she wanted to fcuk me. I didnt think much of it and just thought he was fcukin around cuz he was drunk until he gave me a piece of info I knew she had to have told him. He said that she wanted to fcuk me cuz I was the first guy friend she had that didnt try anything on her(bedding her quick I guess). And yes, this was true.

Anyways, shes obviously the type that is used to getting ALOT of attention and I thought that if I didnt give her alot of attention that night it would be a plus on my side. I saw one of the guys trying to get at her tonight finally bust out his cell phone in hopes to get her number and thats when she walked away. Me and my friends were laughing cuz I actually thought she was falling for his sh!t.

So to get down to it...did I do the right thing by not showering her with attention and acting like I didnt care although she was getting attention from plenty of doods anyways?
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

Read more...

Kings_royalty

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Jun 7, 2006
Messages
343
Reaction score
0
Yes, you did the right thing bro, that's how you should always treat the real 'hotties'.

While all the guys are looming over her and giving her compliments, you'll be the one dancing around her mind, raising her Interest Level without even trying.
 

Phyzzle

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jun 19, 2006
Messages
1,963
Reaction score
35
But now you have to do something. You can't sit and wait for her to call you again and ask you out or ask to come over to your place.
 

grinder

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jun 12, 2006
Messages
587
Reaction score
32
NO.

You have hesitated and seem more interested in talking about it than doing something.

You had your best shot in bowling class. Didn't take it.

You said you were trying to get her. YOU ALREADY HAD HER!

Don't blow it by waiting any longer (if its not too late already).
 

Rebound Material

Master Don Juan
Joined
May 13, 2006
Messages
816
Reaction score
6
Location
California
grinder said:
NO.

You have hesitated and seem more interested in talking about it than doing something.

You had your best shot in bowling class. Didn't take it.

You said you were trying to get her. YOU ALREADY HAD HER!

Don't blow it by waiting any longer (if its not too late already).
see, this is one of the reasons why I come to sosuave. I dont have much problems with getting them...its keeping them and KNOWING when to take it up a notch is my problem. Alright, so given this info, what should I do now?
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

Read more...

zerocelcius

Master Don Juan
Joined
Mar 24, 2004
Messages
924
Reaction score
2
Age
47
Location
CA
Act now, but don't come on strong it will blow everything leading up to now.

Start off where it began, bowling.

From your Q I am Guessing you want to F her? If not you have a great base to work on, either way.

Close the deal either way or you will be a LJBF forever.
 

grinder

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jun 12, 2006
Messages
587
Reaction score
32
Anywhere, anytime, anyway the next time you see her, or if you have her number or e-mail, take your shot.

You already know she's into you but she can still shoot you down for a million reasons.

You've put a lot of pressure on yourself for this ONE. Hope she's not the only prospect you are going for, that's why the pressure is so intense, and fear of being shot down is so high.

Be clear on what you want from the start. Not "I wanna fu*k you.." but you know, stuff already here.

Go anywhere, doesn't matter, but use the stuff here and press forward, taking little risks, progressively: Escalate. It's a series of risks.

All this above is written here a thousand times, but hopefully, here is something new: Make peace with your fear of risking, get comfortable with this fear, use it to guage where you are going, and own it.
 
Top