"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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Did I come on too strong?

King Of Nowhere

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:p :)
 
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"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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Iceberg

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How is this coming on too strong? Maybe in the 1920's.

The only thing you're doing wrong is texting so goddamn much. God I hate when people have these back and forth text conversations.

Even if you wanted to send a random text to make her laugh, you could have just stopped after the Will Ferrell joke.

Look, all you have to do is say, "I think you could use a drink. Let's do happy hour this week." Or if you don't drink, replace that with bowling/hiking/whatever.

Just stop playing around on text and get this thing into the real world.
 

Slick Rick-NZ

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What did she say after you said will you make me desert?
And what did you reply?
When she said when are you coming over would have been a great opportunity to ask her out or set something up.
I don't rely text chicks much I wate a couple of hours between txts some times because I am busy and I hate ah, lame random text when you have nothing to talk about. You don't haf to do that but just act a bit more busy like you have things todo not just sitting around texting every 10 seconds.
But no I don't think you came on too strong maybe you didn't come on strong enough.
Slick..
 

Fred_Scuttle

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Iceberg said:
How is this coming on too strong? Maybe in the 1920's.

The only thing you're doing wrong is texting so goddamn much. God I hate when people have these back and forth text conversations.

Even if you wanted to send a random text to make her laugh, you could have just stopped after the Will Ferrell joke.

Look, all you have to do is say, "I think you could use a drink. Let's do happy hour this week." Or if you don't drink, replace that with bowling/hiking/whatever.

Just stop playing around on text and get this thing into the real world.

Kids text. Never heard of Will Ferrial. Always helps to know the name. A reason you shouldn't text if you cant spell. why would this be strong? Seems awfully light to me.
 
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Iceberg said:
How is this coming on too strong? Maybe in the 1920's.

The only thing you're doing wrong is texting so goddamn much. God I hate when people have these back and forth text conversations.

Even if you wanted to send a random text to make her laugh, you could have just stopped after the Will Ferrell joke.

Look, all you have to do is say, "I think you could use a drink. Let's do happy hour this week." Or if you don't drink, replace that with bowling/hiking/whatever.

Just stop playing around on text and get this thing into the real world.
Iceberg hit the nail right on the head. Texting and the internet is cool IF you can quickly transition to the phone and an in-person meeting, quickly.
 

"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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