Desdinova's Game Improvement Journal

[Desdinova]

So here's how my current situation sits. I've been dateless for the last month or so. I haven't even wanted to go out dating after the last batch of girls I've gone through. There's lots of really low quality 5hit out there, so I've just been enjoying my time doing my hobbies.

Over the last month or so, I've decided that I'm going to remain celibate for a while (with the exception of one girl I previously dated who's been orbiting me, and has clearly indicated she's DTF.) Instead of doing the bootcamp again, what I want to do is actually focus on improving my game. I'm still on the rusty side and want to get back up to the level - and hopefully surpass the level I was at ten years ago. I'm going to be focusing on some points that I'm already good at (approaching and kino) while I focus on some of the points that I need work on (conversation and getting her genuinely attracted).

I will not be doing any number closes for a while. Number closing is one of my strong points, and I need to keep women (and the frustration of flaking) out of my life at this point. I want to get my game up to a very functional high level before I do any actual closing. This is the place where I'll be putting my field reports and looking at my errors. Feel free to post feedback.

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I went out Saturday night to a karaoke bar. I was dressed in well-fitted jeans, a shirt I cut the sleeves off, and a slashed up jean jacket with the sleeves hack off as well. I looked like a fvcking rock star.

My initial goal was to approach a set as soon as I entered the bar. I approached one with a guy looking at the song list book. We chatted for a bit and I went to sign up to sing. A fattie who was in the set initiated conversation with me and immediately started kinoing me. I fired back with "hey, hands off! Touching isn't free" and got an immediate negative reaction. She froze me out of any following conversation. Lesson learned: don't neg a fattie when you could utilize her for a bit of social proof.

I opened another set of three girls, chatting up the resident fatty first. The loud, opinionated one of the group butted in to give her two cents on the question I threw at them. She seemed slightly unpleasant which was evident when I re-approached the group later. Wasn't sure on how to handle that one because my target sat there saying absolutely nothing. I figured it's better to bail on a set that's going bad rather than stay there and risk lowering my value.

I approached another girl who was waiting in line to buy a drink. She was extremely receptive of me, and based on my appearance was expecting me to sing Guns n' Roses. We ended up getting into a good conversation about the band. Some guy came up to her and bought her a drink. After he left, I said "Why didn't he buy me a drink? I'm cute!" It got a good laugh out of her.

I noticed a guy sitting at a table all by himself, so I went up to him and made friends. This ended up being my 'go to' location for the rest of the night when I just needed to sit back and think about how things were going. Plus I now had a friend to converse with.

I randomly approached a HB7 and got into a discussion about the current song being sung (Goodbye Earl) and how I thought it was a man-hating song. The girl was very receptive to me and we ended up having some really good conversation, teasing back and forth. She was initiating 'accidental kino' and giving me other IOIs which told me that she was very interested. My problem here was I failed to take things to the next level. I ended up being stuck in 'teasing mode' when the chick was clearly ready to move ahead. Thus, I ended up blowing it by over-teasing her and spinning my wheels.

While I was putting a new song up for karaoke, I was opened by a HB9 who was trying to convince me to sing "Twinkle Twinkle Little Star" with her. We got into some quick convo and found out we both work in identical fields. I told her that I was going to sing Britney Spears, and she asked if she could join me in doing so. I agreed to it.

I ran into her later and some dude had his arm around her. After he buggered off, she said "eww, I can't believe he asked me out!" She told me she turned him down and I hi-fived her.

When I got up on stage to sing my Britney Spears song, she came and joined me like she said. I had the dance floor packed and some chick was recording me with her phone (it's probably on youtube SOMEWHERE.) I had to leave after that because I had to go pick up my kid. I didn't say goodbye to the HB9, but I said goodbye to the HB7 who seemed disappointed that I was leaving.

So the night wasn't a total failure. I managed to hold my higher value despite all the mistakes I made.

 

[Desdinova]

Monday Night:

Sunday and Monday are the deadest nights to go out, but it's what I've got available. Off to another karaoke joint, again dressed in denim but wearing a jean jacket this time. I had two women who were going to meet me there, but the place was virtually dead when I showed up. I made very brief chit chat with the pre-karaoke entertainment.

I ended up approaching a 3-set that was at the bar: one guy and two girls. I struck up a conversation with the guy first and ended up chatting with the one I considered to be the obstacle. I ended up asking her "do you respect men who will buy a girl anything she wants." She ended up being a bit negative about the question and said "What a weird question to ask!" I can't remember how the neg came about, but I told her "Don't worry, I had no plans on buying you a drink" and she seemed a bit surprised at that - that a guy would actually tell her that as opposed to the guy in the set who was feeding them free drinks.

One of my problems is when I get into a set and one of them ends up being a bytch, I discard the entire set. I hadn't even made contact with the target who's eye contact and body language were sending me vibes that she was attracted.

I struck up another conversation in a set of all guys and made a new friend for the night. Unfortunately, some of the guys are worse than women and he tried to get me to buy him a drink. I gotta start dressing like I'm a fvcking slob so people don't think I'm loaded

The hostess showed up and came to give me a hug. We ended up chatting for a bit and I was happy to finally get some female social proof. I sang my first song and that bytch I wouldn't buy a drink for was completely into it, watching me, dancing and enjoying herself. I should have re-approached the set afterward, but I had other things awaiting me.

I struck up a conversation with this girl sitting all by herself. She was kinda ugly, but good conversation isn't based on looks. The other two girls finally showed up, and chatting with the three of them was pretty much how my night went since nobody else walked into the place.

 

[visions]

nice job making approaches, i think you're a bit too critical of yourself... being a playa ain't easy, especially nowadays.

from my experience it's a waste of time (for various reasons) gaming sets containing more than one female. one angle i can see working with a group is playing the "i want to make friends" card. you can then use the group to further network, or you may even find some of them chasing you once you develop some rapport over who knows how long.

...you definitely learned a lesson with the fattie/kino situation.

do you do daygame? all my 5 lays last year came from day game i ran at stores and other spots. i'm not fond of night game.

 

[BeDJ]

Good stuff. I have gone a month without dating this year. It is VERY VERY similar to approaching your first set of the night. Prepare for failure. This may be anti-DJ-ism, but set up your next couple dates with anyone above an HB5 so you can get back into it.

I'm not an advocate of online dating, although it can provide that spark to get your mojo back.