"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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Depressed as hell.....

B

Bud_Fox

Guest
I'm almost 29 and it seems like most of my co-workers are getting engaged and settling down.
I recently came out of a LTR that ended badly. We argued a lot the last few weeks then she caught me on a dating website.
I have had a few dates since then but no potential with any of them.
Maybe my standards are too high, but has anyone ever felt that time was slipping away?
i know i'm fairly young...........but i'm still feeling depressed about this.
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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AlexLefty

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You have another solid 10 years at least. Honestly, you don't have to worry about getting married until you're 40 if you don't want to. Don't get down on life before you've even finished living it.
 

Mike32ct

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I know the feeling, but try not to dwell on it. People call me "too fussy" all the time. Actually they first call me gay...then too fussy lol.

Actually I'm not that fussy on looks. A decent 7 chick is fine. What is so rare is a good "connection" where you both really "click."

But don't panic at 28/29. My game didn't even get started until then. By 30/31 you should have lots of options. Hang in there man.
 

Htienvu

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I am going through the same thing right now, 29 in a couple of months and feel like time is up for me. It does get you down I feel like I have no time left to have fun and I should find a LTR and settle down.
 

NoCommitments

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Most of the people getting engaged & settling down nowadays are not socially grown or spiritually stable to hold a LTR or have kids. They do it for various reasons like feeling pressured or thinking they've found the "right one". but think about those 2 words for a minute..."settle down"..No one should be settling & no one especially should be going under or down their value scale... Although this doesnt hold true for everyone it is very common. Don't be like them. I was. And I payed the price of putting girls & family through a lot of pain until I finally grew up.

Now I'm 40 & wish I had this knowledge at 25...

...You're young! Get yourself well, meet many women & define your inner core. Once you know who you are, you'll know who deserves you!

Good Luck!!
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

Read more...

loveorlust

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NoCommitments said:
I'm almost 29 and it seems like most of my co-workers are getting engaged and settling down.
I recently came out of a LTR that ended badly. We argued a lot the last few weeks then she caught me on a dating website.
I have had a few dates since then but no potential with any of them.
Maybe my standards are too high, but has anyone ever felt that time was slipping away?
i know i'm fairly young...........but i'm still feeling depressed about this.
Cheer up cry baby. George Clooney would probably kill to be 29. Have you been at least working on your game up till this point? If so, perhaps your 30s are your golden years of getting laid. At least that's what I'm hoping for :)

Mike32ct said:
What is so rare is a good "connection" where you both really "click."
Wish I could have that with like 10 different bomb shell girls (3 half blond and leggy, 3 tall brunettes, 1 dorky hotty, and 1 sexy & successful business woman, 2 celebs) at the same time. That connection feeling is so freaken amazing! Though I think it's biologically impossible to experience with it several woman at the same time. Why else hasn't it happened to me lol

NoCommitments said:
No one should be settling & no one especially should be going under or down their value scale
Hey NoCommitments, would you say that to a girl who has settled for you so luckily for you meets YOUR value scale (but you don't meet hers)? A little unfair, don't you think?

Just playing dog.


K losers. You've guys have been blessed once again with my participation in this heart felt discussion.
 
P

perseverance

Guest
How many of your friends who settle down will still be with the same woman/man in ten years time?

Relationships have a sell by date these days, they aren't worth the investment in my opinion unless you stumble across a woman who is an ideal fit and you click with on every level, then the investment is more than worth it. 29 is still young, you have years left in you and you can always date someone ten years younger than you in ten years time and still have family etc (if that's what you want). You're making a mountain out of a molehill.
 

floydb25

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Not a good mindset to have, fellas. This leads to desperation, which leads to poor decision making. Beyond that, you aren't entitled to anything. This whole process is how things work. Dating around, getting disappointed, taking your sweet time finding the right one. Doesn't matter if you like it or not. Can't just snap your fingers and wait for magic to happen.

Gotta keep chugging along with your head up high - without looking or pushing for a relationship. It will happen naturally if it does. Don't place relationships on a pedestal - just because you aren't in one. There are many wrong relationships you could jump right into, but that's not very wise.
 

Dust 2 Dust

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Time is nowhere near up for you. In my opinion you still have another 10 years of prime dating before you. If you're 29 you should have no problem pulling women in their early 20's.
 

pdx1138

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getting near then hitting 30 those thought do hit you.

acknowledge them, then get focused on other things.

You never know when something great will come along.

I've been dating for years. had plenty of bad dates and a doozy of a bad relationship gone wrong. very depressing.

A month ago I met the most amazing no-drama girl I've ever had the good fortune to meet.
We click on just about everything...so far so good. Ya, it could be the "love potion" talkin, so I'm taking it one day at a time like AA lol.

It could happen to you at any time.
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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