"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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deleting a HB from blackberry messenger. not interested. AW.

big weezy

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this girl is in town who comes over every few months for about a month for work, she's in the entertainment industry (urgo.. attention seeking wannabes galore) so i sense an attention wh0re potentially even though she came from humble backgrounds.

anyway we got talking for a while, i made a thread about it before about whether i shoulda stayed or left when i did as it had already been 1/2 hour of talking and i was already friendzoned but had i stayed potentially coulda got out of it. she went to the bathroom, asked me to look after her stuff. as she came back i packed up my stuff to leave.. she looked disappointed.. not that i was leaving, but that she didnt have me round to use me for my attention to waste time while she waited for her train in couple hours. i knew this from the way she said goodbye to me, when i went to kiss her on the cheek, she looked away with disdain. i already knew there and then she was just a user.

anyway, she didnt have a number here so we swapped blackberry messenger pins. i contacted her a week later to meet up for a drink, and as expected she gave me some fluff response about how she'd let me know when she was finished with her work session. i sent something back saying let me know an hour before hand (mistake i know.. too available, i pressed return before i could edit it properly)

then few days later she put a diff pic up of a cartoon, i made some joke about how it looked like her. she didnt reply.

a week later now today she updated her pic again with some sexy photo of her and some hot blonde. i should have tried to build rapport rather than go straight into suggesting a time/day this week seeing as she's leaving soon cos if she has no IL then me offering a date time is going to get nothing, anyway i sent 'so i guess you're leaving soon.. we should get together for that drink in next couple days, i got a few things on this week but hows tomorrow or thurs evening?'

retrospectively looking at it, it looks too eager and needy cos i didnt even bother making any rapport cos i was applying the 2 strikes rule and i couldnt be bothered to make an effort to get her interested as i felt she already wasnt and i was going through the emotions. she read it almost immediately then i sent a: p.s. who's the blonde in your pic? she's quite hot, like something outta the entertainment industry

i sent this almost immediately after the 1st msg as blackberry messenger is just a IM convo tool. both read in succession no response.

she's an attention wh0re i know it, the industry she works in breeds them.

the question is, i know she's not interested so fvck it move on.. however if i delete her as a contact from my list she will notice (unless she has 100s of contacts, which is possible) if not now but later, will that show her she affected me?

i may more than likely see her about town in next few days and if i do i'll ignore her, not let her think i'm still interested but not act angry cos that'll give her validation she affected me.

but if i delete her as a contact will it signify to her that she got me? im just anticipating she'll prob delete me when she heads back so i rather delete her before she does it to me.

i know it's petty but at same time i feel agrieved by being used by an attention wh0re, and even though i shouldnt care i dont want to leave her with the satisfaction that she affected me. would me deleting her signify that?
 

"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

Read more...

Vice

Master Don Juan
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Another case of thinking too much.

Dude, DELETE IT. Who gives a f*ck if she notices?

Also, you set yourself up for failure by not being a MAN who is in CONTROL, and settled for a cute little PIN instead of a phone number or instant date. Then you proceeded to send her cute little messages on a piece of plastic. Congratulations, you've made yourself another orbiter.

If you were approaching more chicks, this thread wouldn't even exist because you wouldn't be wasting your time thinking so much about ONE GIRL, and making a thread about it.

Go meet some new chicks dude.

And if you see her again, be friendly. The last thing you want to do is be boyishly pouty and act like she hurt your feelings. Remember that you're a man, and that you don't need to explain your actions. If she asks why you took her off your cute piece of plastic, tell her the truth. It doesn't matter what she thinks. But don't let it get to you. It's really not that big of a deal. If she gets upset, she just filtered herself out because you probably wouldn't want to deal with her sh*t anyway,

Lastly, what did you learn from all of this?
 

big weezy

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Vice said:
Another case of thinking too much.

Dude, DELETE IT. Who gives a f*ck if she notices?

Also, you set yourself up for failure by not being a MAN who is in CONTROL, and settled for a cute little PIN instead of a phone number or instant date. Then you proceeded to send her cute little messages on a piece of plastic. Congratulations, you've made yourself another orbiter.

If you were approaching more chicks, this thread wouldn't even exist because you wouldn't be wasting your time thinking so much about ONE GIRL, and making a thread about it.

Go meet some new chicks dude.

And if you see her again, be friendly. The last thing you want to do is be boyishly pouty and act like she hurt your feelings. Remember that you're a man, and that you don't need to explain your actions. If she asks why you took her off your cute piece of plastic, tell her the truth. It doesn't matter what she thinks. But don't let it get to you. It's really not that big of a deal. If she gets upset, she just filtered herself out because you probably wouldn't want to deal with her sh*t anyway,

Lastly, what did you learn from all of this?
i did go for the number! she doesn't have one specific to this country as shes only visiting and im not gona take her foreign number instead, it cost a fortune to call it.. the bbm pin gets me the same thing.

im just trying to walk away so that in her eyes she doesn't have the satisfaction that she had me. it's a general mentality thing that im tryna address cos everytime a girl isnt interested i either act angry when i see her about if i ignore her or i act like im still interested by giving her attention even though im not. i haven't got the balance right yet still.
 

Vice

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big weezy said:
i did go for the number! she doesn't have one specific to this country as shes only visiting and im not gona take her foreign number instead, it cost a fortune to call it.. the bbm pin gets me the same thing.

im just trying to walk away so that in her eyes she doesn't have the satisfaction that she had me. it's a general mentality thing that im tryna address cos everytime a girl isnt interested i either act angry when i see her about if i ignore her or i act like im still interested by giving her attention even though im not. i haven't got the balance right yet still.
Fair enough. If it was me I would have went for an email, since I don't have Facebook, but that's only if anything didn't happen when I first met her.

Don't worry what she thinks. If you feel she's wasting your time, delete her. It's really that simple.

Again, when/if you see her again, all you need to do is casually say "hello" and that's it.
 
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