"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

Read more...

Deicide's FR Journal

Deicide

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Apr 2, 2007
Messages
491
Reaction score
4
Yesterday continued...
I said Hello to a few attractive stranger girls as I was walking throughout the day.
HB 6 Chubby brunette
I saw this girl in my History class. I told her Hey and smiled before the beginning of class and she ducked her head. I thought "What the hell", and I asked her what she thought of the class after it was over, her major, etc... Now, I have a shy girl to talk to during History class.
HB 7 Black
I talked to this girl a few times last semester. I saw her working out at the gym, and I approached her. It was fun. I was making her laugh, and I started off the approach by touching her hair. We talked about school and working out. She flexed her muscles for me. haha I got her number after asking her "Do you want to meet again or go out sometime". I may be asking this girl to go out with me Friday. Perfect timing for the 3 day rule since I got her number Monday.
HB 6 Asian with acne
I just saw her in the Gym, and I told her Hey and talked for a minute and exchanged names.
I'm sure I talked to more girls, but these were the most significant of the day.
I'm having trouble getting a date scheduled with HB 8/9 Asian. HB 7 Brunette is too busy with school to hang out today, so maybe I can get her to go out Thursday. HB 7 Mixed black and white girl has yet to answer my text message where I asked her to go out to a restaraunt with me Friday. If she doesn't respond, HB 7 Black may get her Friday night slot. This is so much easier with multiple numbers.
Lately, I've been tempted to approach some 3-4 sets of guys/girls. I'm a little nervous about it because A.I want to keep my PUA stuff on campus a bit of a secret. B. I approach women already from all social circles, so a potential reputation could take a hit from doing such things. I'm sure I'll do some multi-set approaches by the end of the semester.
 

"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

Read more...

Deicide

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Apr 2, 2007
Messages
491
Reaction score
4
Today
I talked for a minute with that HB 6/7 Brunette at breakfast this morning. I need to try and sit by her long enough to build some rapport and do a number close soon.
HB 7 Mature brunette
I saw her in the computer lab, and I told her Hey, and I started talking to her about general things and what we were working on. She introduced the "My Name is" part and I shook her hand. She thought she might've met me somewhere else before. haha, no. I negged her about her being afraid of her public speaking class. One of my best friends was sitting by me and sent me a text message saying "You got more game than I thought, good job". I asked if she was single because it was an older woman, and I asked if she wanted to meet again and exchange numbers. She took the "Let fate decide things" route and said she may see me around. I'll take that as a rejection.
Older women are easier to game, but they may be harder to number close if you look like me(a young man with black and blonde spikes). If there was one other variable, maybe I could've gotten her number, but whatever.
And I talked to girls after my academic classes and fitness cycling and abs classes, so I'm making an effort to remain social and to always be talking to women.
 

Deicide

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Apr 2, 2007
Messages
491
Reaction score
4
Yesterday
HB 7 Korean girl
I did a "street pick-up" attempt with her, because I talked to her about her classes and other things for a couple minutes. I didn't number close because I need to build more interest with her. I will try to have fun and tease her next time.
HB 8 Korean
I met this girl the night I hung out with that one Korean girl with the boyfriend. She stopped in her tracks to talk to me, which was good. I talked to her about the snow falling, and other things, and she seemed interested. I kino'd a little by touching her arm a couple times. She was with an Asian guy, but it wouldn't hurt to ask her out the next time I see her.
HB 6 Taiwanese girl
I saw her sitting down reading a book outside class. She seemed surprised that I approached her, but I've done this enough that little things like that don't bother me. We talked about our majors, classes, and I teased her about being shy, but she didn't get it. The ultimate irony happened when I talked about her eating sushi for lunch and she said "Do you mind?", and then I shook her hand and exchanged names with her. Quite crazy.
I also sat down at lunch with 2 girls that were shy, and didn't seem to want to talk to me. Whatever. I sat down for supper for a couple minutes with a group of black girls, and one liked my Cowboys jersey, and we talked about that. The one I was interested in, didn't seem interested in me.
HB 7 Black Girl
I played a couple games of pool with her in the gameroom recently. I saw her at the Fitness Center, and she was happy to see me. We talked about working out, her tattoos, and I negged her about me not wanting to see her stomach tattoos until she gets in better shape. She was cool with all of it. I asked her if she wanted to meet again sometime instead of just running into each other at the gameroom, and she didn't want to exchange phone numbers but opted for the "We'll run into each other sometime" option. Good game doesn't always mean a number close.
And I found out that girl that speaks Portuguese has a boyfriend, so 5 out of 5 of my first week numbers were from women in relationships.
 
Last edited:

Deicide

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Apr 2, 2007
Messages
491
Reaction score
4
Today
I was in the library coming out of the bathroom when I saw an HB Asian girl and my DJ sense knew what to do...
HB 7 Blonde
I talked to her in the cafeteria. She is in my Philosophy class, she we talked about, and I teased her about her taking it as an elective. Good approach.
HB 7 Korean Petite
I said Hey to her at first, then asked how she was doing, and what she was doing here. I talked about me having my Japanese lab, and I negged her for studying all the time. The approach was probably a minute long because I had to get to kab, but I exchanged names, and I touched her arm as I shook her hand. Prospect.
HB 7 Blonde Fitness
I talked to this girl once last semester. This time, the approach was much funner and easier. I've improved in my comfort levels so much.
We talked about gym, our majors, classes, and I had her laughing and being interested in the conversation. I negged her about being unable to do the stairclimber like me. And even after she said "Well, I have to go", I kept the conversation going about gym classes like cycling, and then we left each other. This girl is one that I would like to ask out eventually, possibly the next time I see her.
I asked the HB 7 Black woman to go on a date tomorrow night, and she said she was in a relationship with a woman. I told her I didn't mind that. But, she said she felt bad for me in a sympathetic way.
The HB 7 Brunette never answered my text(I have tried to call this girl but she only texts) about going to the comedian with me, so I went by myself. I talked to the HB 8/9 Asian there that I've been wanting a date with. Hopefully, we'll set up a date next week.
 
Last edited:

Deicide

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Apr 2, 2007
Messages
491
Reaction score
4
Today
HB 7 Korean Petite
I saw her walking along my path on the way to class, and she stopped in her tracks, and we started talking. We talked about our classes, her mp3 player native to her country, her trying to learn English and attempting to be a university student. She doesn't speak English well, but I asked if she wanted to meet me sometime instead of just talking when we run into each other. Then I explained if she wanted to go out, hang out, etc... with me, and she agreed, and we exchanged phone numbers. She doesn't speak English well, but I will try to spend time with her next week.
 

“The 22 Rules That Flip the Script With Women… And How You Can Use Them Tonight”

Most guys accidentally kill attraction before they even speak. They assume they need a bigger bank account, a better physique, or smoother lines. They miss the point.

Female desire operates on a specific set of psychological triggers.  Break them, and you're invisible. Follow them, and you become magnetic.

I learned this the hard way. Years of freezing up. Getting friend-zoned. Watching other guys walk away with the girl I wanted. Then I discovered a set of 22 simple rules that rewired my entire approach.

Read more...

Deicide

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Apr 2, 2007
Messages
491
Reaction score
4
Today
I found out HB 8/9 Asian had a boyfriend. I called her last night and sent her a flirty text, and her boyfriend sent me a text back telling me to back off. I had no idea she had a boyfriend, so I apologized to both of them today when I saw them. They weren't upset with me.
HB 6 Piercings Black
I talked to her briefly this morning for the first time ever when we were walking out of our dorm. I saw her in the gameroom after lunch, and she was happy to see me. I talked about her original homelocation, and I teased her about her lack of pool skills, and I got her phone number after having only talked to her for about 5 minutes total.
I called HB 7 Korean Petite and set up a Wednesday night hang-out session. The phone conversation was slow because she doesn't speak English well. And her lulls in conversation are awkward as well. She wil say uhh for like 5 seconds straight and she seemed shy just talking to me on the phone. Either way, I'm happy to have scheduled a time for us together. :)
 

runner83

Master Don Juan
Joined
Feb 22, 2010
Messages
1,098
Reaction score
47
Location
Australia
Deicide said:
Today
I found out HB 8/9 Asian had a boyfriend. I called her last night and sent her a flirty text, and her boyfriend sent me a text back telling me to back off. I had no idea she had a boyfriend, so I apologized to both of them today when I saw them. They weren't upset with me.
Good work with the approaches and keep it up.

But this part stood out to me.

From what I could gather, she didn't tell you she had a boyfriend when you got her number?

The little slvt was looking to two time, her boyfriend found out, and then you apologise to both of them?

That in my mind is weak. Learn for next time.

Proper DJ response would have been:

- wait a week

- send her another text along the lines of "Let's catch up wed night" (or whenever)

Then if she wasn't interested, burnt her number then.
 

Deicide

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Apr 2, 2007
Messages
491
Reaction score
4
runner83 said:
Good work with the approaches and keep it up.

But this part stood out to me.

From what I could gather, she didn't tell you she had a boyfriend when you got her number?

The little slvt was looking to two time, her boyfriend found out, and then you apologise to both of them?

That in my mind is weak. Learn for next time.

Proper DJ response would have been:

- wait a week

- send her another text along the lines of "Let's catch up wed night" (or whenever)

Then if she wasn't interested, burnt her number then.
The funny thing is that all of my talks with her came in front of her boyfriend! She is a desk worker at dorms at my school, and her boyfriend, who I thought was just her friend, would always be at the desk with her. I had talked to her a few times at the desk while he was there, and I asked her out. She told me "I don't know", but I exchanged numbers in front of him. I waited 4 days, I called her(I'm not calling on Saturday), and she didn't answer. Then, I saw her the day after, and asked her if Friday night would be good, and she said she was going out of town and that she would have to see. I saw her and him together at a college comedy show Thursday night, and I approached her about plans for a date, and she once again pulled the Idk thing. I called her Sunday night, and sent her a flirty text message since she didn't answer. Then her boyfriend sent me a text message telling me that he is indeed her boyfriend. He also told me to quit hitting on her, and that I couldn't take a hint that she didn't want a date. He also said he let all of this go on to see what his girlfriend would do. They're with each other all the time! But it's alright, just not a good situation. I don't know why he let me keep trying to go out with her.
 

runner83

Master Don Juan
Joined
Feb 22, 2010
Messages
1,098
Reaction score
47
Location
Australia
Deicide said:
The funny thing is that all of my talks with her came in front of her boyfriend! She is a desk worker at dorms at my school, and her boyfriend, who I thought was just her friend, would always be at the desk with her. I had talked to her a few times at the desk while he was there, and I asked her out. She told me "I don't know", but I exchanged numbers in front of him. I waited 4 days, I called her(I'm not calling on Saturday), and she didn't answer. Then, I saw her the day after, and asked her if Friday night would be good, and she said she was going out of town and that she would have to see. I saw her and him together at a college comedy show Thursday night, and I approached her about plans for a date, and she once again pulled the Idk thing. I called her Sunday night, and sent her a flirty text message since she didn't answer. Then her boyfriend sent me a text message telling me that he is indeed her boyfriend. He also told me to quit hitting on her, and that I couldn't take a hint that she didn't want a date. He also said he let all of this go on to see what his girlfriend would do. They're with each other all the time! But it's alright, just not a good situation. I don't know why he let me keep trying to go out with her.
That's weird....them two I mean. Is he Asian as well? Might explain a bit.

Well, plenty of other girls out there.
 

Deicide

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Apr 2, 2007
Messages
491
Reaction score
4
runner83 said:
That's weird....them two I mean. Is he Asian as well? Might explain a bit.

Well, plenty of other girls out there.
No, he's white. And he seems a lot less quieter than me, so I'm confused how he got with her in the first place.
I did some approaches today.
I started off bright and early in the cafeteria. I'm not much for approaching women consistently while they're eating, but I saw this girl that looked like she was mixed black and Asian, and I couldnt resist.
2-set of AV 5(Average haha) Black and HB 7 Black Asian.
I was actually sitting down for breakfast with a girl and her roommate that I had just met through approaching the past week.
I approached them with "Hey, I think I've seen both of you in the game room", and the AV was doing most of the talking. We talked about pool, and how busy my day tomorrow would be. I exchanged my names with both of them. I think HB 7 knew what was up because she was laughing a little. I'm looking to create rapport with HB 7 Black Asian. I don't like to go for number closes unless I have good one-on-one time with a girl. But that can be done in less than 2 minutes with some girls.
HB 8/9 Latina Fitness
I saw her when I was coming out of the bathroom. I asked her and her decent looking white female friend if they were going to cycling class too. They both said yes, and I ended up having a conversation with the white female friend as HB went to the bathroom.
After cycling class is over with, I approach HB 8/9 Latina and talk to her about working out, cycling, and classes that we have. We exchanged names and I know by what she was wearing that she is a sorority girl.
Then I went to my Abs fitness class. It is always 95-99 % Female, so it gives me a good workout, and a good choice of women to talk to during and after class.
HB 6 Brunette Fitness
She was sititng beside me, and I just started talking to her about the class, and I aske dif she had been before. Later on, I saw her looking at the fitness class schedule, and I asked if she felt sore, we started talking about how we were feleing and we exchanged names.
I told a black girl in the class Hey, and she replied back, but after class, I aske dif she was sore, and she said no, and acted like she didn't want to talk to me, Whatever, it happens.
Working out is great for meeting attractive women.
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

Read more...

Deicide

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Apr 2, 2007
Messages
491
Reaction score
4
Yesterday
HB 8 Blonde Athlete
I approached her in the cafeteria and talked about sports, the recent snow, and her performance thoughts. I gave her my name, and she didn't give me hers, and I said "That's cool". I initially regretted and was thinking why did I say that. But, I'm not phased at all by this now.
HB 6 Black
I opened with "That's my team there", referring to her Dallas Cowboys hoody. She said that she had seen me wearing my Cowboys stuff a lot too. We talked about the disappointing Cowboys season, I negged her about her lack of pool skills, and we exchanged names. It was a decent approach.
Then Night fell and the real fun began...
 

Deicide

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Apr 2, 2007
Messages
491
Reaction score
4
Iota Phi Theta Party(Black Fraternity Party) I was the only white person there not in a fraternity.
I approached 6 sets the entire night, and because if the bad weather, that was about 90 % of the female population that night. All were cold aproaches.
HB 6 Black: I quickly approached her while she was with her group of friends that I knew, and we exchanged names, and she said she was someone's boyfriend that I knew.
HB 8 Mixed Black and White: This girl was upstairs with her friends when I approached her. We talked about how we were doing, the weather outside. I went downstairs, and negged her about her dressing so warm because she couldn't stand the cold. I grabbed her arm playfully and said we should dance, and she didn't want to, and went upstairs. haha, it happens.
HB 7 Cute Thick Black I approached her with a Hey, and a smile, and we started talking about having to walk through the snow to get to the party. I negged her about her being dressed so warm, and her picky tastes in music. (She said she didn't want to dance until she found a good song she liked).
HB 7 Curly Black: She was with the above-mentioned girl. I talked with her briefly about stuff.
HB 6 Tall Black: I approached her and negged her about her coat, and it was very easy gaming her! I was making her laugh with about everything I said. She didn't want to dance though.
HB 7 Mixed Black and White Thick
I saw her upstairs and she smelled like ganja. haha She was very receptive talking about things, and I was able to do some touching/kino with her. She introduced me to her shy friend who was with her. She didn't want to dance for some reason, whatever.
HB 6 Out of State Black Women
I approached her at the bar. She was with her friend, and I negged her about her coming to the party so late. She said she was from out of state, and we talked about how close I lived to her college, her major, etc... Her friend was with her, and I talked briefly with her. She didn't want to dance either.
So, with only about 25 people at the party, it was hard to convince girls, even with decent game, to dance with me. It was obvious that they weren't at the party to meet white boys with black and blonde spikes, but I'm still proud of myself for approaching. I will definitely do better at a bigger party. Despite decent game, it's hard to compete with guys that can dance and look better than me. I can't dance well. I'm ready for the next party.
 

Deicide

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Apr 2, 2007
Messages
491
Reaction score
4
Yesterday
HB 7 Blonde Music
I saw her outside the cafeteria waiting for a friend and I told her "Hey, how are you doing?", and she replied back, so I went and approached her. I talked to her for a few minutes about the snow, her major, music, etc... It was a good approach. She is a sorority girl. If I didn't have any live numbers, I probably would've closed. But, I'll weigh my options, and this isn't a bad pick at all for the potential future.
Today
I started off the morning by saying Hey to a Black girl with blonde highlights. She smiled and said Hey back. So, then, I asked her how her day off was. And then ***** mode occured. "I think you're confusing me for someone else". WTF. That just totally went against the body language and eye contact she had just given me. Whatever, me and my friend had a laugh over it. No big deal.
HB 7 Taiwanese Smoker
I saw her smoking outside the building that I have Japanese class in. I approach her and ask her if she is taking any English classes, or if she is a university student. We get to talking more, and I find out she's from Taiwan, she will be here for the next few months, and she took Japanese too. I had her laughing, and I laughed at her too over stuff. We exchanged names. It was a good approach.
 

Deicide

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Apr 2, 2007
Messages
491
Reaction score
4
Dating Time. The fun part. Since it snowed so much Wednesday, I didn't get to hang out with HB 7 Petite Korean, but we scheduled a dinner date at a Chinese restaraunt for next Friday night.
HB 7 Brunette has been disqualified for lack of interest in me.
I will try to do something with HB 6 Piercings Black this week. If she doesn't do anything, I have plenty of other options. I think I will invite her to a College Comedy Show Tuesday Night.
And parties are great for approaching women. I can't wait for the next one.
 

Pimp-sicle

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jul 27, 2003
Messages
2,457
Reaction score
101
Location
Pimpsylvania
First off I want to give you props for making a conscious effort to get better with women. That is always the biggest step for most guys and why 95% of dudes who don't over come their fear end up settling for an average chick and a slow death...lol

Now on to your approaches. There have been several approaches now, I'm guessing 20ish or so.

You need to LEARN from your mistakes or you will keep repeating them. Its great that your using the numbers game strategy (keep approaching and one will bite), but getting repeatedly shot down should tell you a that:

I'm steering wrong at some point


Despite what you think, its OKAY for a girl to recognize that your flirting with her, you don't have to make it some big time secret in order to eventually close and get a date.

However the problem I currently see with you is:


a) you literally talk to every single girl in the room; Now this is great, but its BAD because it makes you look desperate. Instead pick and choose your targets and make it easier on yourself by:

1) looking for signs of interest from them, such as:

a) prolonged eye contact
b) a smile
c) hair twirl

Once you learn to recognize some of the signs of interest it should calm your fear and anxiety while in the approach.

Secondly, your topics of conversation flat out suck! lol Sorry bro, its the truth. I remember a lonnnng time ago when I first got into learning about game and all I read a post that said: "Only talk to her about stuff that you two can talk about."

That stuck with me and was a huge reason I quickly picked all this info up. Talking to them about their major, if they're "sore" after a workout, if they come here often etc is just flat out BORING!

You need to understand that women are emotional creatures, they act on how they FEEL. You are not making them feel ANYTHING, hence the constant rejection and disappearing act when you try to contact those that you get numbers from.... (indirect rejections to save your feelings).

It seems from what your writing here that you are pretty much robotic in your approach with every single girl. Instead of asking their opinion on something, try looking at your surroundings and starting a conversation that way. For example when you recognized the sorority chick and started a conversation about that it will get you further than asking their opinion on your watch.

Next, self improvement should always be step one! If you are skinny, work on your physique. If you have bad teeth, think about getting them fixed. If your clothing style doesn't compliment your body or image, think about changing it. If your tone of voice isn't suave, work on it. You get the point.


You have to put the BEST YOU forward, if you expect to get quality in return.


Here are some quick tips:

Never ASK if they would like to hangout again. That's complete BETA and shows weakness and insecurity. Instead, TELL THEM. At the end of a good approach, tell her to "give me your number and we will talk again." Or some variance of that. The difference in this is slight, but SO BIG because one shows weakness, the other shows confidence.

Next, learn to be interesting, get girls laughing. Again if you can't hold her attention, you aren't going to get far.

All these approaches and rejections should tell you that your conversation and possibly your look is not working.

So start to examine and fix what is not working, because if you keep doing the same thing, your going to get the same results.







PIMP
 

"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

Read more...

thechosenone2190

Don Juan
Joined
Dec 30, 2009
Messages
165
Reaction score
6
Though I admit I am a newb and think Pimp-sicle is providing sound advice, I kind of disagree with him.

"Next, learn to be interesting, get girls laughing. Again if you can't hold her attention, you aren't going to get far."

True, but I don't think this mindset will take you very far. You shouldn't try to please her. You're supposed to try to please yourself by having fun with the approaches and in the process make her laugh at the same time as a byproduct of you just having fun.

As Pook once said:

"The early Pook thinks, "Oh my. I hope I am doing things correctly. Is she smiling? Is she keeping eye contact? Is SHE having fun?" The later Pook thinks, "Wheeeeeeeeeeee!" Have fun! To hell with formulas and rules. As long as I have fun, what does it matter if she rejects me or not? I think, "Well, she doesn't know how to have fun!" Focus on having fun then on avoiding the pain of rejection or loneliness. The carrot is more attractive to her then the stick. Quit taking this so seriously! These are GIRLS. GIRLS! What are they going to do to you? Beat you up? You like having fun, right? Then do it! Be playful. Be crazy. Do what makes YOU have fun, and see if she'll go along for the ride. No more nervousness! No more shyness! Those originate in you worrying how you will be percieved. Rather, everything is in how you percieve yourself. This makes the difference."

PS The number of approaches you're making is pretty impressive. Keep it up. I have to start making those approaches too sometime soon.
 

Pimp-sicle

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jul 27, 2003
Messages
2,457
Reaction score
101
Location
Pimpsylvania
thechosenone2190 said:
Though I admit I am a newb and think Pimp-sicle is providing sound advice, I kind of disagree with him.

"Next, learn to be interesting, get girls laughing. Again if you can't hold her attention, you aren't going to get far."

True, but I don't think this mindset will take you very far. You shouldn't try to please her. You're supposed to try to please yourself by having fun with the approaches and in the process make her laugh at the same time as a byproduct of you just having fun.

As Pook once said:

"The early Pook thinks, "Oh my. I hope I am doing things correctly. Is she smiling? Is she keeping eye contact? Is SHE having fun?" The later Pook thinks, "Wheeeeeeeeeeee!" Have fun! To hell with formulas and rules. As long as I have fun, what does it matter if she rejects me or not? I think, "Well, she doesn't know how to have fun!" Focus on having fun then on avoiding the pain of rejection or loneliness. The carrot is more attractive to her then the stick. Quit taking this so seriously! These are GIRLS. GIRLS! What are they going to do to you? Beat you up? You like having fun, right? Then do it! Be playful. Be crazy. Do what makes YOU have fun, and see if she'll go along for the ride. No more nervousness! No more shyness! Those originate in you worrying how you will be percieved. Rather, everything is in how you percieve yourself. This makes the difference."

PS The number of approaches you're making is pretty impressive. Keep it up. I have to start making those approaches too sometime soon.

You misinterpreted my post bro.

That was EXACTLY what I was suggesting to the OP.

BE INTERESTING: this is a broad term an can encompass many different avenues. Personally being fun is always the BEST way I have seen to not only get girls on your jock, but also have fun in the process.

MAKE HER LAUGH: Women love to laugh, most guys are naturally sarcastic and funny, BUT they turn into zombies and freeze up around attractive women or girls they like (pedestal effect). Laughing is a great tonic that puts people at ease.

HOLD HER ATTENTION: I'm guessing this is probably where you think I'm suggesting for him to base his game on "pleasing the girl." Nothing could be further from the truth. Holding a woman's attention is ESSENTIAL if you are ever going to have success in the game. This DOES NOT mean to cater to her, supplicate to her and try to do things specifically to please her. It means learn to be interesting, fun, and make her enthralled with you. Intrigue her mind with your words, intrigue her hormones with your presence.


Getting good at cold approaches is something many guys can never master. They are their own worst enemy in these situations, giving too much power up to the target before a word is even said.

Once you learn to love yourself and feel confident in yourself, the rest will fall into place because women won't intimidate you.

Lastly, there is a certain level of knowledge and PROGRESSION that is necessary to get to this level. Such as learning from your mistakes, learning how to carry a conversation, letting the girl talk, not letting your emotion get in the way etc.

These are all things that the OP is yet to learn and WHY he is not getting any success yet.

This will sound like I'm bagging on him, but I'm simply trying to teach him where he's steering off course so he CAN taste success.

Right now he feels like he has several "options" because he has a handful of numbers. But its very easy to see based on their initial interactions that none of these girls have interest in him.

Never confuse getting the number with getting pu$$y. At the end of the day a number doesn't mean $hit. Why? Because if she never answers, calls back or accepts a date invite you know the true answer. And that is, she was giving you her number to get rid of you.







PIMP
 

Deicide

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Apr 2, 2007
Messages
491
Reaction score
4
Thanks for the advice Pimpsicle. I had no idea why I was struggling so much with finding success with women this college semester despite applying myself to approaching a lot. I do need to try to get numbers after a good approach from now on, regardless of if I feel I don't need a number at this time. I need to open based on the woman herself, or surroundings. I'm not afaid to fail or to be rejected at all. It's happened before, no doubt it will happen again. But, I'm not bothered by that.
And women NEVER give me eye contact or IOI's unless I smile and say Hello first. I always feel like I have to go in and be the hunter,spit my game, and hope for the best. Then again, I'm 5'9 175 with black and blonde spikes, and more than one person has said that I give off an agressive vibe. I'm not a very attractive man, so game is essential for my success. I'm working out on a regular basis. I lift weights, run, take cycling classes, stairclimber, etc... I want to get down to 170, or possibly 165. I have to keep approaching, though it's not fun not getting dates with women when you work hard to apply yourself. Hopefully, I'll have two dates this week.
 

Pimp-sicle

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jul 27, 2003
Messages
2,457
Reaction score
101
Location
Pimpsylvania
Deicide said:
Thanks for the advice Pimpsicle. I had no idea why I was struggling so much with finding success with women this college semester despite applying myself to approaching a lot. I do need to try to get numbers after a good approach from now on, regardless of if I feel I don't need a number at this time. I need to open based on the woman herself, or surroundings. I'm not afaid to fail or to be rejected at all. It's happened before, no doubt it will happen again. But, I'm not bothered by that.
And women NEVER give me eye contact or IOI's unless I smile and say Hello first. I always feel like I have to go in and be the hunter,spit my game, and hope for the best. Then again, I'm 5'9 175 with black and blonde spikes, and more than one person has said that I give off an agressive vibe. I'm not a very attractive man, so game is essential for my success. I'm working out on a regular basis. I lift weights, run, take cycling classes, stairclimber, etc... I want to get down to 170, or possibly 165. I have to keep approaching, though it's not fun not getting dates with women when you work hard to apply yourself. Hopefully, I'll have two dates this week.

No worries dude, I know your putting in a lot of effort here, but you are clearly missing some elements to give yourself a fighting chance.

Okay lets discuss your "look." 5'9 175 isn't terrible unless you don't really have much muscle mass on you and a belly? Working out is essential, but you need to realize what you EAT is what will make the difference in the gym. Eat like crap or not enough high quality protein and the right carbs, fat and you won't see any changes. Visit the H&F forum to start learning about carb cycling, supplements and water intake for leaning out.

Secondly what's the deal with the blonde and black spikey hair? I see you mention your not that attractive, I'm going to guess your saying your average in looks? Well if your average in looks, that doesn't mean you can't get girls, but it DOES mean you will have to work harder at your game AND nothing will help you more than having a look that fits you and makes you look more attractive. In a nutshell, consider getting rid of the wild hair do, so many people, newbies especially are caught up in being like Mystery and peak-****ing......while it does make you "interesting" to a degree, a clean look that fits you will get you looks from women.

My guess is right now you don't get any looks from women cuz you look like a freak show. It will take some trial and error, but you will find what fits. If you have to use the opinion opener it might not be bad to actually get some solid advice from women (even though they don't know much...lol) about what hairstyle fits you.

Once you put your best YOU forward, the fish will start to bite. So if your out of shape a bit, don't really have a style that defines you, then work on that! Trust me, nothing makes me feel better than going to the gym, getting some new clothes and going out on a Friday night. The inner game that is present is multiplied by 10000 when you look good as well.

Next, so if you think about the fact that you are approaching women who for the most part are not giving you any signs of interest, your really going in BLIND to each approach, which is fine, but you will see much more rejection this way. Maybe that's a good thing so it won't phase you, but in my opinion I'm all about closing the prospect that's taking the bait, that I'm attracted to, rather than approaching as many women as I can.

Once you take care of cleaning yourself up and getting in better shape, your inner game will start to develop. Women will start to notice you and you will realize you don't need to memorize opinion openers, etc etc. You can do whatever the fuvk you want.

Women have a 6th sense to sniff out bs, and they also know when they are in the presence of a truly confident man. Its the little thing that turns that switch on or off in her brain when she decides whether she's attracted to you and it happens pretty quick.

I can't stress enough to learn to be interesting, funny, etc. If you are not good at these things, work on it. Read help posts, ask for advice and preferably become friends with a few guys who are GOOD with girls and learn from them.

You've started the journey, there's a lot of bumps in the road, but it will only get better when YOU get better.

If you make 10 approaches and don't get a date, you need to stop and ask yourself: "Where am I going wrong?" Do not think a number means anything, because it doesn't. I am at the point know where I can easily tell how into me a girl is when I meet her. Sometimes I don't even ask for their number and they give it to me before we part ways. THAT is showing you how powerful this stuff is, that is the woman straight up saying "I want to see you again."

Lastly, understand that some women are flaky, some are in a bad mood when you decide to approach and some are just not interested.

Last last thing; no more opinion openers, its time to try some new material. Try to open based on the surroundings. For example if your at school and there's a band playing in the quad, talk about that to build rapport. If she has an interesting sweatshirt, talk about that like you did with the sorority chick. Point is, make it INTERESTING, no bs about what classes they are taking, or asking girls if they are sore after the ab class.... that just sounds weird...lol

And when you number close, no more "can I have your number?" Instead say: "I've had fun talking with you, give me your number and we can hang soon." Or something to that effect, the psychology is your showing confidence and TELLING her you want her number, not supplicating and asking as if its your lucky day. And no more "do you want to see me again" or whatever that line you use goes..... Don't ask, TELL when closing.....








PIMP
 

Deicide

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Apr 2, 2007
Messages
491
Reaction score
4
Hey Pimp. I don't have a belly, but I could lose a little more weight(5-10 pounds). My body type is similar to MMA fighter Fedor Emelianenko. I like my black and blonde spikes and I'm doing better with women than when I had my Dumb and Dumber hairstyle for sure. I'm thinning, so spiking it covers the fact that my hair is thinning. I'm average in looks. I'll post a pic sometime. I should say "Let's exchange numbers and we'll talk later'. I think I'll do that next time during a good cold approach. I could've had 2 numbers last week. But, I'm not kicking myself over it. Chances are that I'll run into them again or that one is in a relationship anyways. I'll just keep in mind that I need numbers. Just because I have a date set up doesn't mean anything.
 

"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

Read more...

Top