"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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Dealing with feelings of regret

Comatozed

Senior Don Juan
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I don't know what's gotten into me lately, I have a few plates, none of which i'm particularly into, but it's a better position now than it was a couple of months ago.

Yet a couple of months ago I was over my oneitus, and now for some unbeknown frustrating reason I keep thinking of her. I haven't seen or spoken to her for 5 months and the relationship itself was for less than that. She was the first girl i had feelings for.

I'm starting to worry if i will ever fully not care. Any advice?

What pains me the most, is that if I knew what I know now back then, i'm 100% I woulda played it in a way in which her high interest to begin woulda got higher... it's eating me up tbh... I wasn't the guy she initially thought I was back then... but I am now, or at least I know now how to give off that image. I was anything but a challenge and probably really needy.

The night I met her I had taken a bit of md, and looking back I was doing all the things taught in game just by chance. Negs/kino/qualiying and there was a real spark. I haven't come close to repeating that with anyone, and i often feels forced and not a natural enjoyable interaction like that was.

This has turned into a bit of a ramble. Anyone been in a similar situation and moved on?

I'm pretty **** at picking up girls and basically relying on tinder as of now, which makes my quest to find someone better than oneitus even harder.

Guessing the verdict will be continue to improve yourself in all areas and start cold approaching? I'll be damned if i need online dating, yet my social circle are all coupled up.
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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jimmy18

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Time heals all, as long as:

1. You remain NC with her
2. You keep spinning plates and meeting new women
 

Zapp Brannigan

Senior Don Juan
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You should really try to make another move if you can. The feeling of regret and not knowing is worse than any rejection you might receive. If things don't work out, you'd know for sure that it's not meant to be, and won't have to wonder.

You can't force yourself to get over someone. If circumstances are against you right now when it comes to trying things again with this oneitius, just live your life like Hank Moody. Don't blow any chances, keep some good plates spinning, but never blow a true chance with your oneitus if it presents itself.
 

Comatozed

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Yea circumstances are really against tbh. She lives in a city 60 miles away and I removed her on FB and unfollowed her on twitter. We have 0 mutual friends so unless I randomly bump into her on the rare occasions I go out in her city then I likely won't ever see her again.

I feel like any attempt to contact again is from a weak place, because lets be honest, if I had found someone else, I wouldn't be messaging a girl that lives 60 miles away. But I thought we got on..and I did nothing to convince her otherwise when she ended it, I went n/c hoping it would have some positive effect and it didnt.
 

soden

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Comatozed said:
Yea circumstances are really against tbh. She lives in a city 60 miles away and I removed her on FB and unfollowed her on twitter. We have 0 mutual friends so unless I randomly bump into her on the rare occasions I go out in her city then I likely won't ever see her again.

I feel like any attempt to contact again is from a weak place, because lets be honest, if I had found someone else, I wouldn't be messaging a girl that lives 60 miles away. But I thought we got on..and I did nothing to convince her otherwise when she ended it, I went n/c hoping it would have some positive effect and it didnt.
Bold = everything you need to know
Green = your answer to your own question
 

"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

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