Dealing with a needy woman

[Charlie]

I don't want to "next" her as there are alot of good qualities she has however I need to sit her down and explain to her that:

1. I'm not there for her all the time. I have my own life.
2. Not to use emotional blackmail to get her own way. She uses the b.s. line of me not being as in to her as I was before hand when I don't do what she wants like talking on the phone at night.

I'm just planning to lay down the law and let the chips fall where they will. If she can't handle that then so be it.

Do you think this is the best strategy or is this perhaps a bit too far?

 

[logic1]

I don't want to "next" her as there are alot of good qualities she has however I need to sit her down and explain to her that:

1. I'm not there for her all the time. I have my own life.
2. Not to use emotional blackmail to get her own way. She uses the b.s. line of me not being as in to her as I was before hand when I don't do what she wants like talking on the phone at night.

I'm just planning to lay down the law and let the chips fall where they will. If she can't handle that then so be it.

Do you think this is the best strategy or is this perhaps a bit too far?

Yes you have the right idea. Explain your boudaries.

But this is a perfect example of a person being different at the start of the relatoinship, maybe doing things to get her to like you, ect. Not being your real self. Then after a few months changing to someone different.

You should have taken care of this at the start then she would have known the real you from day one.

 

[Bible_Belt]

She uses the b.s. line of me not being as in to her as I was before hand when I don't do what she wants like talking on the phone at night.

Speaking of 'at the start,' don't have long phone conversations, ever.

But yeah, you have the right idea. Just be the one who is not afraid to walk away.

 

[Latinoman]

I don't want to "next" her as there are alot of good qualities she has however I need to sit her down and explain to her that:

1. I'm not there for her all the time. I have my own life.
2. Not to use emotional blackmail to get her own way. She uses the b.s. line of me not being as in to her as I was before hand when I don't do what she wants like talking on the phone at night.

I'm just planning to lay down the law and let the chips fall where they will. If she can't handle that then so be it.

Do you think this is the best strategy or is this perhaps a bit too far?

How old are you and she?
How long has you two being together?
Are you two in a committed relationship? Married? Living together?

My point is...you have provided no many details.

 

[I.A.F.Y.B.]

I don't really mind needy girls because, they are all into you and give you the attention you want. They spend more time with you so you know what they are doing. But, yes enough is enough. You can tell her your boundaries or just tell her you doing something when she wants to see you.