Dealing with a girl I work with

[christoff522]

Okay, weird one. She is an attention *****, of this I am aware, but she's also got some BPD traits.
She escalates then runs off.
Anyway today, she gave me a lift home, and asked me what I "I think this is" I said I didn't know what this was, and I said I thought we both liked each other but we're both mental.

Anyway, she said she didn't want me to get my hopes up after everything thats happened and that it keeps going in circles and the she didn't want to make me sad and hurt me again. I was basically like okay (outside my house), she said I looked sad but she seemed far more sad than me. She basically had tears in her eyes.

She locked the car door because she didn't want me to go. I kept asking her to let me out but she didn't want to because she thought I wouldn't speak to her anymore. But eventually I got out, and I went inside and got her her birthday card because I may as well give it her as I don't really fancy giving it her in two weeks time because yeah...I didn't intend to really speak to her anymore after this.

So yeah, she doesn't want to take it, because she knew what it meant. She then keeps ringing and texting saying she feels like the worst person in the world, and saying she wants to be close but if I can't she understands, and I said well its not fair on either of us because when one of us gets in a relationship the closeness will be gone so its best to keep distance now.

So how do I deal with this? Its not exactly a big place where we work, she obviously cares more than I do, but I just want advice...is she a potential plate, or should I steer well clear?

 

[Black Widow Void]

Not one, but two things working against you (even as a side dish).
If she has symptoms of BPD, that's something to avoid
You two also work together (and you mentioned that it's a small place).

If you value your job and your sanity, I'd steer clear.

 

[manfrombelow]

Workplace romance is never worth it.

OP, keep it friendly and professional, but don't try to make it romantic or sexual, and you will be fine.

 

[christoff522]

Thanks guys, I know she has BPD traits as she's already caused bother for me before, and she is very volatile. I wasn't really interested anyway but I enjoyed the attention.

 

[bmp2cpm]

The best scenario: If you got a job at another company, then you could have some fun with her for a short time before the situation completely collapses in on itself.

Second best scenario: stay at the company, report the situation to HR, and lie low.

 

[SW15]

Workplace romance is never worth it.

That's true for most white collar workers who work day shifts in offices.

If you're a store level retail worker, dating a co-worker is a no big deal. Same goes for most other service sector workers. Bartenders and gym employees routinely engage in workplace romances each other.

It's not a big deal in blue collar work either, which is less politcally correct than white collar, office work. However, there are few women working in blue collar occupations.

 

[manfrombelow]

That's true for most white collar workers who work day shifts in offices.

If you're a store level retail worker, dating a co-worker is a no big deal. Same goes for most other service sector workers. Bartenders and gym employees routinely engage in workplace romances each other.

It's not a big deal in blue collar work either, which is less politcally correct than white collar, office work. However, there are few women working in blue collar occupations.

I agree. If you are a horny guy working as a burger-flipper at McDonald's next to that hot blondie, I'd say bang her anytime you want.