Day approaches

[asid76]

I was just reading a post about ELstud approaching girls in malls and it got me thinking. What is the best way to do an approach like this?

I asked a female friend about this and she said she would love it if a guy approached her as long as he was good looking. She said that a simple: "hi, I wanted to meet you" would work. If he was ugly, she said she wouldn't like it.

So, what if one isn't good-looking? How would one approach and generate enough interest in a random girl to get a phone number within, say, five minutes? This question is directed more towards people who cannot use their looks to get girls because of course if someone who looked like Brad Pitt were to approach a girl in a mall he'd have no problems. I am wondering how those not blessed with looks make their daytime approaches...

I need some tips because I am seeing some gorgeous women in the supermarkets, walmart, the mall, etc...and I want 'em.

 

[slickaz]

ok so im a black guy in a predominantly caucasian country.

Girls here are a little bit shy or preffer white guys to black guys here i guess because alot of the times my white friends get numbers in malls beaches etc and i generally dont get past the first look, no eye contact etc.

Im not bad looking as i work out and 12% body fat 6ft3 200 pounds. i have been told im very handsome many times but only AFTER i start talking to them and they get comfy. All the girls ive laid/ got interest from are girls that have been introduced to me by friends etc..the girls then seem stuck on to me like superglue. so i know im not that bad.lol

i guess its the "difference" in me that gets them shy at first.

anyway i used to put of cold approaches, guess i figured my skin tone meant the girls generally wont give out numbers.lol...it has happened before which is why i gave up.

but couple days ago i figured i might as well try.
basically i started of talking to store hotties, receptionists, bartenders etc...basically just start by saying hi, pick up on smtn interesting about her, shoes/tattoos/ even used the special drink on the bartender etc.. ive noticed girls LOVE to talk about themselves to strangers as soon as you give them a topic they want to talk about..usually that topic is fashion/accessories etc that they have. its not hard to pick smtn out.

Yesterday at the mall i was at a sneaker shop and a HB8 next to me was looking for her first pair of Air Force's..i overheard her conversation with the sales girl.i waited for the sales girl to go away. and moved in like

ME: Man! its hard to pick one out huh, so many colors n styles!
She: <Smiling> phew! yeh! my first pair, and i wanna wear it to a party tonight but i dunno anything about sneakers.
Me: Well..todays ur lucky day coz where i come from, you learn a lil smtn about kicks very early in life.
She: <Laughgs> Yeh my prayers have been answered! could you help me pick a good pair? <Smtn like that> my name is *** <reachs hand out>
ME: Im Slick
Her: Oh sexy name! <DID NOT HAPPEN! IM JOKING>
ME: So you a sneaker pimpette?lol
She: HAHA is that what they call it?

I basically picked on talkin to her about her clothing style.. i negged her a lil in teasing and she made good attempts to qualify herself through jokes etc.

anyway i helped her pick a pair in about 15 minutes <GIRLS!> coz she was talking to me about what shes wearing etc...

She wanted to hang out with me and buy me coffee but i had a "friend" of mine destroyed by chances of grabbin that coffee. check out my new thread for thats tory!..annoying!

at the end of it i got her number, she took mine and told me to call her on monday <tomoro>

so my advice to you:
- Be confident

- Dont act like approaching is new to you or it worries you.

- My Experience: Girls seem to LOVE a confident guy that knows he looks good enough to just walk up and say hi. If ur comfy in it, then she gets the vibe to be comfy too..if you're acting strange, not smiling and hands on ur pockets etc she'll feel nervous and bounce.

- When you do it, you may get a little voice in your head saying NO! dont do it, dont listen to em, thats your AFC speaking. just go for it, coz girls are human too. if you talk to them nicely they'll talk back. whats the worse that can happen

- I tend to do it when im alone at the mall, because then you dont have idiot friends trying to be AFC hitting on the girl because you've already opened her.

- Dress to the occasion or dress smart casual. girls DO NOT like guys who try to look like they walked out of Queens NY. black street thug look does not work on girls. I usually wear fitted jeans and a full sleeved shirt folded up. or a correctly colored ralph lauren polo on denims/ shorts and the right kind of shoes. i also try to take my ipod with me and listen to good tunes. because the music also gets me in a creative mood to come up with good stuff to talk about...and the good music gives me that extra bounce/swag.

- Be yourself, dont try to be something you think she wants, she'll pick it up quickly.

- And ive learnt from the advice guys have given me here, dont be phased if a couple of the girls you approach give you a cold shoulder or in my case, give you numbers with high IOI and then flake on you. dont get put off by it or stop approaching. coz if you approach 10 girls, atleast 5 of them are good for a date set up etc..
Women are beautiful creatures dude, theyre also not that hard to obtain...

good luck.and keep up updated..

SORRY FOR LONG POST!

 

[COD]

ATTITUDE HAS ALWAYS AFFECTED YOUR ALTITUDE.....its not what you say ITS HOW YOU CONVEY.

-avoid the bull-dog approach......."dang girl U is hot can I gets your digits"

-skip generic compliments as an opener

-be congruent: if you got a default opening line make it relavent to your surroundings and or circumstances.

-can I show you something in YOUR size at a shoe store
- wanna grab a pizza said to a model at a fashion show
-Nice melons-in the produce section at a grocery store
-are they giving away free money said to people standing in long lines for hours
-so do U get to keep a percentage of the checks you cash-said to a teller at a bank

 

[asid76]

Thanks guys!! I just saw this movie called "Dan in Real Life"; there's a funny scene where he's in the bookstore and pretends he works there when a woman walks in. Then he proceeds to show her all these books while chatting her up. Its hilarious. And it worked. He got her out of there and went somewhere else and they chatted for hours.

It kind of reminds me of the advice given here...I have some good tips to work from. If I could get five out of every ten girls that would be great. I don't believe thats possible though, 1 in 10 sounds more realistic to me. But I am going to try the "dan in real life" method at the mall next time. I am glad COD mentioned to not use the generic compliments as an opener, I was wondering about that. I think hot girls get "opened" that way a lot so I will try to be more random. And slickaz advice was amazing as well...I am trying to destroy the "inner afc" and its mostly working, but the chump within hasn't completely died yet, sometimes I still hear him say things like: "she won't go for you" or "she's too hot for you". I have to destroy these voices...and act like approaching girls is something I am totally comfortable with and that they are lucky to have me talking to them. Aargh! So many bridges to cross still..

As always, thanks for the advice.

If anyone knows any other good ways to start conversations with random girls in malls or stores or at the park, I would love to hear them...

 

[Snow Plowman]

Presence + Polarity + Strong Reality = Naturally Attractive Man

That is all you need, it's easier said then done but that's all you need and you will have a EASY time doing this. You'll generally always have great interactions...

Presence - Who you are...your core identity...it must be centered and you must have a clear vision of who you are. When you fully know who you are, you will start to have a presence because you are centered admist the chaos

Polarity - Drawing state from with and being that man who dictates the vibe, energy and leads the overall interaction. Women want to be taken by a man who has masculine polarity they will try to find out how they can attract you.

Strong Reality - This is the unwavering belief and 100% certainty of your way of being...there are certain ways you act because of your reality. This is why you do what you do because you live in specific realities.

Now with all that said you can go up to a chick and just say "hi" and it will go well...the words start to no longer matter, the IOIs/IODs no longer matter, TRYING TO GAME no longer matters...it's just you being you.

 

[daygameguy]

Knowledge Base + Practice --> Success --> Confidence = Your Best Self + Best Game.