dating other women

[speedo_meme]

OK I've been seeing this girl for about 3.5 months. Recently we've been having problems because I've been an AFC (same girl my other posts have been about) but I've cured alot of that by nutting up and being a man (trust me). This point last week I was accusing her of being a flake, but now she's calling me begging me to call her and other stuff....anyways, she called me her boyfriend yesterday (don't know if she meant it or not) and she treated me real good after a week of flaking. I think maybe this weekend her IL increased because I said f*ck her and did my own thing.......

I have another girl on the backburner that I think I might want to mess around with. The problem is, I do want a relationship committment from the first one, but I also don't want to get hurt by her games, and right now I can't tell what she's up to. I care about her alot, and I know the man shouldn't bring up the conversation about committment, but I'm curious if I should. I don't want to lose a shot at the second girl esp. if my "girlfriend" suddenly changes her mind again...

So do you guys think I should go out with both of them? Or do I ask the girl about our committment level? I think I probably know the answer to this one. I want to date the second, but I really like the first girl and want a relationship with her. The second girl is just 20 and who knows what problems she may have...

 

[NewMan]

but I also don't want to get hurt by her games

You will only get hurt if you allow her to.

Sorry, but I just don't get this whole post. The 1st girl obviously has control, since your afraid of hurting her and being hurt yourself.

Why would you have a conversation with her? If you don't give a F, then just go out with the 2nd chick and have fun.

The 1st chick sounds like a lot of work anyways.

 

[speedo_meme]

basically put, i can't put the entire situation in a post, it would take pages and pages. I've been an AFC with my gf, and I'm trying my d*mndest to quit. It's not that she's the problem, the problem is my own AFCness. I think going out with another chick would help that, but at the same time I don't want to lose out on another fairly good relationship. But I guess if I continue to be AFC I'm gonna lose out eventually anyway.

I won the girl back indefinitely by completely cutting out of town to go get wasted with my buds and watch a football game when I was supposed to be with her (we had made vague plans). She expected me to follow her around like a dog. By the way I f*cked a chick this weekend too, which she will never know about). The problem with this other girl is that my girlfriend will probly find out about her, seeing how they're in the same town.

D*mnit, I know I'm rambling, but this AFC sh*t has got to go. I guess I've been one so long I don't know how to quit.....

 

[NewMan]

state of mind.

Bottom line - you either want out of the relationship with your "Girlfriend" (and it sounds like you do, since your fvcking other chicks) or you want a relationship minuis the AFC behaviour.

you being AFC and dating other women are mutually exclusive. One doesn't lead nor solve the other.

Start being a man today. then figure out whether you want in the relationship or not.

 

[MacAvoy]

Prior to you pushing her away w/ your AFC behaviour then regaining control, have you ever had a commitment discussion. Prior to her calling you her b/f the other day, if you've never discussed it, and you were only dating then I would continue with the previous agreement.

It would be AFC of you to allow her to put in your in committed relationship w/out ever discussing it and her simply calling you her "boyfriend".

Instead of bringing up the subject, I would NOT hide the fact that you are seeing other women, that way you force her to want you and have her ASK you to be committed, thereby giving you the upper hand.