Dating and attraction

[DonJuanabe]

In the beginning stages of dating, attraction can rise or fall quickly. Say a girl you meet is attracted to you, but it's of moderate/high level. You go on a date. Here is my conundrum: often, a date that makes her feel special (such as a nice dinner where you both dress well -- not coat and tie, but say khakis/slacks and collared shirt) will raise attraction. But it also, to me, is the mark of short term dating because having to make her feel special like that is not the kind of relationship I want. I'd rather ride bikes, shoot hoops, go to a comedy club than romance her with a nice dinner. There just seems to be a much smaller pool of women who will maintain or increase attraction via this more friendish style of dating. AD was big into this so the woman proves her interest level rather you spending your time and money to increase it.

Thoughts?

 

[Iceberg]

In the beginning stages of dating, attraction can rise or fall quickly. Say a girl you meet is attracted to you, but it's of moderate/high level. You go on a date. Here is my conundrum: often, a date that makes her feel special (such as a nice dinner where you both dress well -- not coat and tie, but say khakis/slacks and collared shirt) will raise attraction. But it also, to me, is the mark of short term dating because having to make her feel special like that is not the kind of relationship I want.

Expensive dinner with fancy clothes? Screw that. You're trying to buy attraction when you should be building it. You think it builds attraction because that's what we see on movies and in magazine articles, but reality is, any man with a credit card can take a girl to a restaurant. The best kinds of dates are where you're bringing the girl into your world. Where you're happiest, relaxed, and most comfortable leading.

Aka: this...

I'd rather ride bikes, shoot hoops, go to a comedy club

If that's where you're at your best, then have all your dates revolve around this.

There just seems to be a much smaller pool of women who will maintain or increase attraction via this more friendish style of dating.

Funny, I think that's where the largest pool of women increase their attraction. I've had my best success while taking women to my favorite bars for live jazz or just blues on a jukebox at some dive bar. That's my environment. You take somebody like me and throw me into a fancy restaurant with ties and khakis, you're killing the funnest part of my personality.

Restaurants are fine after I've dated a girl for a while. But in the early stages...especially before I've banged her....I'm not going blowing big bucks on some nice dinner. Gotta find out if she's worth it first.

 

[DonJuanabe]

So Ice when are we going on a date? <jk>