Dating a Classmate while spinning other plates...Is it worth it??

[DJDamage]

There is this chick in my program (she is 20, I am 27) who wants to hook up with me and we are actually getting together for a drink on monday. I am spinning another plate as well in the meantime. I have some reservations about seeing this girl because of two reasons:

1) Being 20 she might be more immature and want to be exclusive sooner rather then later which can lead to:

If it ends badley then I will still have to be around her for another year in my class. I don't know how it is to have an angry chick with you in the class when it comes to her maybe trying to turn other's against me (has that ever happen to anyone before?)

Now my question is, is it worth it?? and if so should I tell her right away (that she won't be surprised later) that I just want to date and I don't want anything serious?? I normally don't tell the women I date this because if it ends then I don't have to seem them ever again.

 

[amoka]

Why don't you tell her what you're telling us right now--don't want any serious relationship. I will say " Hey Jessica, I'm not ready for anything serious at a moment. I just want to take everything slow and want to have fun while doing so." A 20 years old kid will definately go along with you--thus if she is interested in hooking-up with you.

 

[azanon]

If he tells her he wants to take things slow, then she might take that to mean that he doesn't want sex anytime soon. He wants to go fast, but slow. That's a bit more tricky!

 

[realsmoothie]

It's tricky... but he can SAY "I want to take things slow" while piling on the kino and it might work.

i.e. in terms of a relationship they're not serious... but in terms of sex (which is sometimes just not discussed) it's happening.

Does this make sense?

 

[Rollo Tomassi]

DJDAMAGE, demonstrate, never explicate. There are subtle ways a woman can be led to understand that a guy is non-exclusive. If you club her over the head by OVERTLY telling her "I don't want a relationship" right out of the blocks you'll play your hand too quickly and you'd be better off not even bothering with her than outright explaining this to her.

Rather, she must be led to the conclusion that you're "in demand" and therefore non-exclusive. To do this you have to communicate COVERTLY, imply this in your actions and the tidbits of information you reveal about yourself. Let her unwrap your intent (i.e. non-exclusivity) over time, do not barf it out all over the restaurant table on your first date. This is an integral part of seduction; become a puzzle for her to solve. At 20 y.o. and at her degree of maturity, this should be like taking candy from children. Her maturity and naiveté are actually an advantage to you.

 

[DJDamage]

DJDAMAGE, demonstrate, never explicate. There are subtle ways a woman can be led to understand that a guy is non-exclusive. If you club her over the head by OVERTLY telling her "I don't want a relationship" right out of the blocks you'll play your hand too quickly and you'd be better off not even bothering with her than outright explaining this to her.

Rather, she must be led to the conclusion that you're "in demand" and therefore non-exclusive. To do this you have to communicate COVERTLY, imply this in your actions and the tidbits of information you reveal about yourself. Let her unwrap your intent (i.e. non-exclusivity) over time, do not barf it out all over the restaurant table on your first date. This is an integral part of seduction; become a puzzle for her to solve. At 20 y.o. and at her degree of maturity, this should be like taking candy from children. Her maturity and naiveté are actually an advantage to you.

Thanks good advice.

 

[resilient]

Rollo's got sound advice. Remaining a challenge and mysterious will make you seem more prize worthy if subcommunicated cleverly. Good luck! Right now I'm studying DocLove's System e-book and it's mind blowing stuff into the realm of interest level and keeping a girl attracted.