Why "Whatever You Want" Keeps You Single

She says the movie looks dumb; you suddenly agree. She tests you with a little attitude; you apologize for nothing.

You think you're being easy to get along with. She reads something else entirely: a man with no edges. Nothing to hold on to. No friction, no tension, no reason to wonder what he really thinks.

The "22 Rules" taught me to push back — playfully, calmly, without needing her approval. Strange things happened after that.

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Date with a Hungarian model

OnTheWayUp

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So gentlemen, it looks like the few weeks I've spent reading on here are beginning to pay off- slowly... I've got a day 2 with a cool Hungarian model this evening to look forward to! She seemed very keen in the bar when we met last Friday, gave me her number easily, allowed me to feel her "sports injuries" on her upper arms, and gave me a couple of kisses on the cheek as I left. The game is on.

Plan for this evening is to meet and go to a bar for an hour or so, then walk about 10 mins to a local park to isolate, then come back to mine to "watch a film." The attitude I'm going to take towards the whole evening is one of trying to make sure we both have as much fun as possible, with as much physical escalation as I can push. Thoughts?

OnTheWayUp
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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loveshogun

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Just go with it

Be in the moment.

You're already doing well if she's letting you touch her and kissing you and sh*t.

And I'm willing to bet that you didn't plan all that out like you did your second date. I bet you were alpha about it, and it came "naturally" (this term is a topic for an entire graduate thesis in my opinion) all because you were taking the opportunities as you saw them.

If you're an easygoing, cool, funny guy who has his life together, you already have your framework (and that framework has one directive: "be awesome"), so stop planning every little detail like "escalate as soon as possible," or "10 minute walk in the park."

Just do what you were doing, and don't make any AFC mistakes, like putting super high expectations on a date just because she's a Hungarian model.

Just have fun with it. Go for what YOU want out of it, and if she digs, then everyone wins. If she don't, that's cool too. No big.

Remember, there is such a thing as planning too much, and women (and people) hate lack of spontaneity. Being a leader means recognizing opportunities and striking while the iron is hot, because ultimately, plans are just plans.

Finally, notice most of the valuable advice here is about what not to do, how to not make stupid mistakes. You can't plan for every contingency, but you can at least avoid the obvious pitfalls.

Be in the moment.
 

OnTheWayUp

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Excellent advice LH, cheers for that. It's definitely a weakness of my game that I like to plan all my moves in advance. Planning ahead works for just about all other areas in life, but not with women! I'll try and go with the flow whilst avoiding crazy AFC errors like telling her I love her (a mate of mine actually did this on a date recently!), and I'll let you know how I get on.
 

OnTheWayUp

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OK, as promised here's the low-down on my date this evening. Feel free to criticise/ take apart what I did wrong. I apologise in advance for the length!

The date went pretty well, given that I'm really not used to taking girls out (this was the 3rd girl I've taken on a day 2 bar-type date). Add in the fact that this girl is, as I said, a model, and that we spoke in German (both our second languages) and I think I did pretty well.

It was a fun evening, certainly, but the vibe between the two of us was never really more than that of friends. I kinoed her as much as I possibly could, and she reciprocated about three times. The closest we got to a more romantic type of atmosphere was right at the end of our time at the bar, when I did a few hand-reading tricks on her which I've recently learned. She loved it! I really don't get why women are into that sort of rubbish, but hey, if they like it, it makes sense to get good at hand-reading and stuff.

We chatted in the bar for about 1.5 hours, during which time I was escalating all the time with my kinoing. The most intimately I touched her was on the cheek (once) and hair (twice). Then I suggested we go for a walk (venue change --> escalation), but she saw a table football table and suggested we play that instead. I love table football, so agreed- perhaps I should have stuck to my guns? Either way, we played TF with some local lads, both of whom were older and had considerably better game than me. I don't think this was particularly beneficial to the sexual tension that I had spent the last 90 minutes building.

After the table football, we went for a quick walk to the local park, but it was almost midnight and I could tell she wasn't quite comfortable walking alone with me in a very secluded area (there's just a narrow path surrounded by greenery). For this reason I decided to try and get her back to her room to escalate there. I suggested we watch a Hungarian music video that we had been talking about earlier, but she declined with the excuse that her room was too messy. I offered my room, but then she said she was too tired. Fair enough: make the ho say no! So I walked her back to her room, got her to give me a hug and kisses on both cheeks, and left.

Besides playing table football, which might have been good fun but wasn't particularly intimate or sexual, I'm pretty happy with the way I played the evening. I made her laugh a vast amount, teased and kinoed her mercilessly, and had a good evening. She strikes me as one of these girls who wait a while to put out though- so I'll keep on spinning the other 2 plates I have.

Thanks for reading! Thoughts?
 

“The 22 Rules That Turned Me From Invisible to Irresistible With Women… Starting Tonight”

You can skip the expensive cars, the fancy clothes, and the endless gym selfies. Completely unnecessary.

I used to freeze the second a beautiful woman looked my way. Frustrated. Awkward. Watching other guys walk away with the girl while I stood there tongue-tied.

Then I discovered 22 simple rules that rewired my entire dating life. The anxiety vanished. Conversations flowed effortlessly. Women started chasing me for a change.

These rules trigger a woman's subconscious attraction switches. And you can start using them tonight.

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loveshogun

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Proud of ya

You did what you could, and it sounds like you at least had fun, and no one died. This is good.

Now here's the question you need to ask - with your escalations, were you dropping laser-guided bombs, or just bombing everything without looking because you had infinite ammo?

My key point is that escalation is necessary, yes - but they should be scarce, and should be precise. When you first met this girl, the time when you were able to get the date in the first place, you escalated when you saw the opportunities. You struck with precision and finesse, not with randomness.

On the date last night, I see that you were escalating here, escalating there, and continued doing it regardless of whether she responded - like you were trying to dig it out of her.

You had the right frame of mind - no one wants to come off as d*ckless - but I feel that you were almost forcing yourself to escalate as much as possible without really looking at how she was reacting.

Remember, when a girl digs your escalations, she'll escalate along with you.

Try not to outpace her. You've gotta balance giving rewards (your physical escalations should be framed as rewards, and should be scarce, not as payments) and playing it easy and letting her dig a little out of you.

Find other people to date in the meantime, and see if she contacts you to hang out again. Nothing wrong with dating** multiple women as long as you're discreet about it. Having other girls around will make you feel less nervous about this one.

All in all, you did well enough, and you'll do better next time with whatever girl you happen to be with.


**Banging multiple women is more complicated. Be VERY discreet. And try not to bang any possible LTR in the first 5 or so dates, cause if they ever find out, it's a time bomb.
 

teacha

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OnTheWayUp said:
So I walked her back to her room, got her to give me a hug and kisses on both cheeks, and left.
WTF LOL
http://i29.tinypic.com/34ss8ow.jpg

OnTheWayUp said:
Besides playing table football, which might have been good fun but wasn't particularly intimate or sexual, I'm pretty happy with the way I played the evening. I made her laugh a vast amount, teased and kinoed her mercilessly, and had a good evening. She strikes me as one of these girls who wait a while to put out though- so I'll keep on spinning the other 2 plates I have.
your whole date was a FAIL. :kick: :trouble:

read the dj bible.
 

OnTheWayUp

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Thanks for the advice, LH. I don't know whether my kinoing was perceived as haphazard or excessive; all I did was try and touch her as frequently as possible. This was most often done to emphasise a particular point or punchline. Could you go into more detail about the "targeted" type of kinoing you seem to be in favour of, I'm intrigued.

Any perspectives on the table football issue I raised?
 

Falcon25

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Fucvking kiss her man. Fuvk. The worst thing that happens is she turns the cheek. Just think that you are a sex machine. So will she. Good luck. Eastern European girls fuvk for food, shoes, any item that they don't have. They are the nastiest sluvts around. Go for it.
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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