Alright guys, this coming Wednesday, I have a date with an hb9.5. She is hot beyond belief, and somehow I managed to convince her to get together and have coffee with me. Anyhow, I'd venture to say this will be the most important date I've had in the last 2 or 3 years. Guys out there, give me some advice on how to keep the convo going. I don't know her well, we've only met once, that was three weeks ago when I got her number. Any help will appreciated, I think I can handle my own, but outside opinions are always good.
"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."
Attraction runs on a clock.
She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.
The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."
One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.
Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.
Date with a 9.5
- Thread starter Rockstar
- Start date
"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"
Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.
You've been "getting ready" for two years.
She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.
Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.
Rocko
Senior Don Juan
What have you been up to? Where did you get that shirt / bluse / whatever? Where are you from? simple questions with input is all you need
Serialized3
Master Don Juan
Keep your mid-game tight.Speak chick (use expressive language) and build emotional connections.
Example questions:
"What are you passionate about in life?"
"What gives you excitement in your life?"
"Why do you get up in the morning?"
"What are the qualities you look for in a guy?"
All good questions because they will really get her thinking and wondering "Why DO I get up in the morning?" which is a thousand times better than asking her where she lives (snore)...
Also, it seems to me that you're already putting her on a pedestal. Knock it off, or you'll defeat yourself if you think she's above you
Example questions:
"What are you passionate about in life?"
"What gives you excitement in your life?"
"Why do you get up in the morning?"
"What are the qualities you look for in a guy?"
All good questions because they will really get her thinking and wondering "Why DO I get up in the morning?" which is a thousand times better than asking her where she lives (snore)...
Also, it seems to me that you're already putting her on a pedestal. Knock it off, or you'll defeat yourself if you think she's above you
Chemistry
Master Don Juan
A chick’s a chick… remember that, regardless of what you score her
Handle yourself as you would do with any chick. Talk about the things you would do with any other chick, and hope she’s got a grain of personality to go with the looks.
Handle yourself as you would do with any chick. Talk about the things you would do with any other chick, and hope she’s got a grain of personality to go with the looks.
Keep it cool. Keep calm. After the date, come here, and tell us how much better you feel. Even if you don't kiss her or whatever, you will feel much more confident, because "you have dated a hb 9.5" ... and this will give you the confidence to do so again and again 
"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"
Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.
She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.
Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.
So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.
The words come later. The impression comes first.
Centaurion
Master Don Juan
You've already lost, putting her on pedastal like you are doing now.
Dont hype it up. It's just a girl. No big deal.
Dont hype it up. It's just a girl. No big deal.
The Bad Ass Canadian
Master Don Juan
Stop putting so much importance on the outcome of this date. You're already losing, going in with this mindset.
She's obviously above you, and you'll convey this either subtley or in an obvious way.
Go in with the mindset that you won't like her. When you can reframe it so that she's below you you'll act accordingly.
She's obviously above you, and you'll convey this either subtley or in an obvious way.
Go in with the mindset that you won't like her. When you can reframe it so that she's below you you'll act accordingly.
Alright guys, I have my date with the hb9.5 in a few hours. I've put myself more at ease in the last couple days. I've stopped hyping up the date and have more of a care free attitude. also, I've been hooking up with another girl for the last three weeks, so I know that if tonight doesn't go anywhere I have another girl already, so no biggie. i'm sure by tonight I'll be at my most charming, witty, and ****y levels. I'll let you all know how it goes.
"She's Out of Your League"
You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.
Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.
She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.
Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.
On a scale of 1 to 10, 10 being great, this date was a 7.5. I got her laughing and smiling a lot. I couldn't get a true read on whether she was into me or not, but she's probably gonna come do something with me and my friends for 4th of July. The only real problems were that there were lulls in the conversation at some points, which I expected being this was our first time really hanging out. I had to carry the convo too. I probably talked about 60 percent of the time, maybe more. But we'll see how things go from here.
DonJuanForever
Banned
- Joined
- Mar 25, 2006
- Messages
- 567
- Reaction score
- 7
To the originator of this post, tell me does this make sense:
I am in sales, I have a great product, okay?
I've found my market.
But instead of doing presentations and meetings with as many people in my market as I can, I do one presentation and hope to live and accomplish all my financial dreams and goals from that one presentation.
Does that make sense?
No it doesn't.
Just like your one date, that's soooo big, with this onnnneee girl, that you just gotttttaaaa have. Stupid isn't it?
Why don't you just go in the field and approach more hbs?
Why put all your eggs in one Easter Basket?
I am in sales, I have a great product, okay?
I've found my market.
But instead of doing presentations and meetings with as many people in my market as I can, I do one presentation and hope to live and accomplish all my financial dreams and goals from that one presentation.
Does that make sense?
No it doesn't.
Just like your one date, that's soooo big, with this onnnneee girl, that you just gotttttaaaa have. Stupid isn't it?
Why don't you just go in the field and approach more hbs?
Why put all your eggs in one Easter Basket?
Rock on Mr. Rockstar :rockon:
Convos can be tough on the first date, but if overall it went good then that's what is remembered. A couple of lulls are normal. Next time be more engaging and relaxed (not that you weren't on 1st date) For good second date convo tips, relate a couple of lines back to convos from your first date, builds rappaport and time-familiarity. You probably knew that but, just some advice.
If shes smiling and laughing and hanging out with you, then you are on the right path.
Convos can be tough on the first date, but if overall it went good then that's what is remembered. A couple of lulls are normal. Next time be more engaging and relaxed (not that you weren't on 1st date) For good second date convo tips, relate a couple of lines back to convos from your first date, builds rappaport and time-familiarity. You probably knew that but, just some advice.
If shes smiling and laughing and hanging out with you, then you are on the right path.
Dude, if you read the post I wrote earlier today I mentioned that I'm already dating someone currently. An hb7. I'm not putting all my eggs in one basket, I'm just casually looking for an upgrade. I also have tentative dates with an hb8, and an hb8.5 coming up. If the hb9.5 from tonight goes nowhere, I have plenty of backup. I'm not too worried. Yeah, I hyped it up when I started this post, but I was just momentarily excited and never generally act in that manner.
"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"
When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.
Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.
Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.
The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.
Chemistry
Master Don Juan
There are always lulls in conversation…
You know what the best indication is that a first date went well? Before you part ways you put your arm around her in your car / at the train station / at the bus station and she moves to you, showing IL on her part, then you move closer for a kiss close as she’s about to leave and she reciprocates.
It’s that simple… end every first date like that, and you’ll know exactly where you stand. None of that what does this mean, what does that mean BS after for you to deliberate over, or for you to post on here, instead you get a straight up affirmation of her IL.
You know what the best indication is that a first date went well? Before you part ways you put your arm around her in your car / at the train station / at the bus station and she moves to you, showing IL on her part, then you move closer for a kiss close as she’s about to leave and she reciprocates.
It’s that simple… end every first date like that, and you’ll know exactly where you stand. None of that what does this mean, what does that mean BS after for you to deliberate over, or for you to post on here, instead you get a straight up affirmation of her IL.
The Bad Ass Canadian
Master Don Juan
That is a really good way of guaging interest.Ashley Chuckles said:
Personally, when i'm out with a new girl, I always assume she's interested. The thought that she may not be, never enters my head.
When I go in with that kind of mindset, I always act normally and never try and "impress" her. I've never had a girl not kiss me after a date... the problem is, I'm usually the one who ends up not interested. At least, that's how it's been going lately.
Zerotwoonenine
Senior Don Juan
its all about questions, keep your mouth shut about your self and ask about her, then responds and show that you are listening. There is a good tip about it in the hall of fame.
More details please. What did she respond well to, did you qualify/tease her, etc. You can't just build up our anticipatioon and leave it at 'it was a 7.5.'
Talking a lot isn't a bad thing, and a lull can be a test to see if how you handle silence. However I'm worried you subconsciously put her on a pedestal, and failed to adequately tease the hottie. Thoughts?
Talking a lot isn't a bad thing, and a lull can be a test to see if how you handle silence. However I'm worried you subconsciously put her on a pedestal, and failed to adequately tease the hottie. Thoughts?