"The Kiss of Death Mistake"

You replay the conversation at 2 a.m. She texted back fast yesterday. Today, nothing. Was that smile friendly or flirty? What did the shoulder touch mean?

Every hour you spend decoding her signals drains your confidence and hands her the controls. Women can sense that insecurity from across the room — and it repels them.

One of the "22 Rules" kills the obsession on the spot: assume she likes you, and act accordingly. Sounds too simple. Works anyway.

Her interest tends to rise to meet your expectations. Psychologists call it a self-fulfilling prophecy.

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Date is set! need advice

donjuanapprentice01

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Well, me and my buddies ended up going to the bar late on Saturday (45 minutes before closing) for a quick game of pool. Of course, the girl I got digits from was working. I stayed aloof, just playing pool with my friends.

So, she came up, we chatted. Anyways, ended up setting up a date for tomorrow night (hope this was ok, not too AFC'ish).

I like live music, so we're going to a bar that has a local band (not a club, more of a high scale establishment). I thought like a DJ and decided to take her some place I wanted to go.

Now, here is where I need some advice. I'm nervous, because this girl is really hot, at least an 8. And, I'm more or less clueless. So, any advice you can give to a rAFC like myself? Do I complement her? Use kino? Go in for a kiss at the end? Do I get her to make a second date?

Sorry this question is so broad, but I seriously need any tips and advice I can get.

Thanks
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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tmpgstx

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First off, don't try to impress her by being overly funny or ****y.

Let her do most of the talking and keep your responses short (not long winded and rambling) and be sure to ask her some questions about herself (this can't be stressed enough). It shows you're not shallow and want to get knowing her as a person too.

When she talks - listen and elaborate on what she said so she knows you're into the conversation. She'll want to hear what you think.

Do some dancing.

At the end of the date, be sure to kiss her on the lips. No cheek pecking or hugs. Just move in and kiss her with no hesitation. Say your goodbyes and that you had a great time (if you really did).

Don't call her. She'll call you. If you do the things above, i guarantee it. It will leave no questions about sex with her later or other dates.
 

blinkwatt

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Originally posted by donjuanapprentice01
Well, me and my buddies ended up going to the bar late on Saturday (45 minutes before closing) for a quick game of pool. Of course, the girl I got digits from was working. I stayed aloof, just playing pool with my friends.

So, she came up, we chatted. Anyways, ended up setting up a date for tomorrow night (hope this was ok, not too AFC'ish).

I like live music, so we're going to a bar that has a local band (not a club, more of a high scale establishment). I thought like a DJ and decided to take her some place I wanted to go.

Now, here is where I need some advice. I'm nervous, because this girl is really hot, at least an 8. And, I'm more or less clueless. So, any advice you can give to a rAFC like myself? Do I complement her? Use kino? Go in for a kiss at the end? Do I get her to make a second date?

Sorry this question is so broad, but I seriously need any tips and advice I can get.

Thanks
Just hang loose and remember its just another human,not some high up God(not that Iam religiuos). If you compliment her on something make it something you wouldnt expect it to be. If she is looking sharp,dont comment with a "wow you look stunning" wait till you get close and comment on her freckles,just a example it could be something else. If you were going to a concert with mosh pits,standing room only or such I would say hold her in front of you close and have your arms around her but I would doubt that would happen at a local venue(this is also iffy depending on her trust level in you.) A kiss at the end? Why not sooner if possible,if your feeling it go in for it earlier and go for greater things at the end,but at least kiss on the lips as a close. Dont mention a second date on the first date,call her back in a few days or see if she will call you. Good luck!
 

Pimp-sicle

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Originally posted by tmpgstx
First off, don't try to impress her by being overly funny or ****y.

Let her do most of the talking and keep your responses short (not long winded and rambling) and be sure to ask her some questions about herself (this can't be stressed enough). It shows you're not shallow and want to get knowing her as a person too.

When she talks - listen and elaborate on what she said so she knows you're into the conversation. She'll want to hear what you think.

Do some dancing.

At the end of the date, be sure to kiss her on the lips. No cheek pecking or hugs. Just move in and kiss her with no hesitation. Say your goodbyes and that you had a great time (if you really did).

Don't call her. She'll call you. If you do the things above, i guarantee it. It will leave no questions about sex with her later or other dates.

This advice is terrible aside from the let her talk part!!! Not because its necessarily wrong, but because your instructing him when to do certain things and what not to do.

Every situation is different!!! Why would he go in for a kiss "on the lips" if he's not getting a positive vibe?? Oh yeah because some dood on an internet player forum told him to... :rolleyes:

Apprentice:

First off good job on the # close, that's always shows that you have to capability to take charge and go for what you want. Now in my opinion in would've been better to wait a few days, then cal and set up a date, but there's nothing wrong with goin going out the next night if you created enough interest and left her wanting more.

Your date idea is good, but would be better suited for a 2nd or 3rd date. Think about it....loud bar, loud band, lots of vultures (other guys) lurking around you two. Its going to be kinda hard for you to communicate with her easily in this type of setting unless you can listen to the band from someplace quiet.

About your question on how to be, what to say etc...I must say with your current mindset your already going to fuvk it up!! Your putting her on such a high pedestal because "she's hot." Guess what, if you act like the way your typing in this post, she'll mentally next you before you can even say "hello" to her. If she's truely an HB8, then she knows she's hot. Show her your use to being around hot girls and she's no different. YOUR THE CATCH, not her. She should be excited to be able to spend time with you.

I think ****y/funny is a great way to break the ice, keep things light and enjoy eachother's company. Compliments can be great if they are used sparingly and are geninuely original. Not "wow you look amazing." Just go with what the modd dictates. Don't start over-complimenting though, that's another deal breaker.

Your frame of mind is completely wrong right now. You should be thinking about what kinda information you want to extract from her, rather than being nervous about the date. Find out if she's worth your time, find out about her past relationships and mainly SHUT UP AND LET HER TALK ABOUT HERSELF because that's what girls like to do!!

Lastly lets find out if she even shows up to the date before we get all excited and nervous.



PIMP
 

Cheat_LBJ

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Originally posted by Pimp-sicle
.I must say with your current mindset your already going to fuvk it up!! Your putting her on such a high pedestal because "she's hot." Guess what, if you act like the way your typing in this post, she'll mentally next you before you can even say "hello" to her. If she's truely an HB8, then she knows she's hot. Show her your use to being around hot girls and she's no different. YOUR THE CATCH, not her. She should be excited to be able to spend time with you.
It's interesting how completely true this is. The minute you put a woman on a pedestal, you're fubared. I catch myself doing it CONSTANTLY: "Oh, that girl is so hot, she's way too hot to be interested in me. etc. etc." You'll be tongue-tied and fall into all of the old behavior traps.

Here's a trick: think how she looks, then think of every girl you know/have seen that's hotter than she is. Think how much better looking those other people are and how much cooler it would be if you could be dating/banging those people instead of her. Think to yourself "by spending time with her, I'm sacrificing time I could be spending chasing after hotter women."

For me, personally, once I realize there are actually hotter/better women out there, I realize that I could (theoretically) be doing better than this woman and she's nothing special.

Maybe that's screwed up, but it works for me.
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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tmpgstx

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Read about Jedi mind tricks in the tips section and don't try to impress her.

Do kiss her at the end of the date if it goes well. It's never failed me and always led to sex. Either that night or within a couple of weeks.
 

\O/

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Originally posted by tmpgstx
Read about Jedi mind tricks in the tips section and don't try to impress her.

Do kiss her at the end of the date if it goes well. It's never failed me and always led to sex. Either that night or within a couple of weeks.
There's nothing wrong with kissing her for the first time on the first date, but you should never kiss her at the end of the date. It's THE most awkward moment and there is too much tension built into that moment. If you haven't kissed her before this point, then I would advice you NOT to kiss her goodbye when you part. Peck her on her cheek or just give her a hug. If the date went well, you will get another chance. Also you will keep her guessing. On day2 however, you SHOULD kiss her. Day3 at the latest. If you don't you may very well end up in the friend-zone.

Stay away from the end-of-the-date kiss. It's too clichè.
 

tmpgstx

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Noooo ... don't kiss on the cheek or hug. This is a submissive bytch boy gesture. It's AFC all the way (no wonder the French do it ..lol).

The end of the date is good because she will be wondering if you will. You sure as hell wouldn't do it during the date and then resume the date - that is awkward.

She wants a man not a boy.
She wants a lion not a puppy.

You do it when you're both alone sitting in your car or on her step.
 

\O/

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Originally posted by tmpgstx
Noooo ... don't kiss on the cheek or hug. This is a submissive bytch boy gesture. It's AFC all the way (no wonder the French do it ..lol).

The end of the date is good because she will be wondering if you will. You sure as hell wouldn't do it during the date and then resume the date - that is awkward.

She wants a man not a boy.
She wants a lion not a puppy.

You do it when you're both alone sitting in your car or on her step.
I disagree. The first kiss should never be at the end. It's too awkward. In my opinion it should be at the spur of the moment. When you are having fun during the date, just lean in and kiss her. It's not awkward after..It's great. And it has nothing to do with not being a man. It's just not doing what is expected of you. It's expected of you to kiss her at the end of the date if you enjoyed yourself. It's a validation and confirmation for her. It puts her in charge.

This is from my personal experience. Maybe you have other experiences, but I think it's better to stand out from the crowd and not do what every other guy has tried to do with her in the past.
 

donjuanapprentice01

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Thanks for all the tips guys!

Seems like no one can decide when I should go in for a kiss. Well, here is an idea I've been thinking.

When it hits midnight, I'll say "well it's officially valentines day. You know what that means?" She'll say "what" and then I'll go in for the kiss.

any thoughts?
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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