"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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Dancing with girls at clubs.

AlmostThere!

Senior Don Juan
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If a girl is just standing around, how do I dance with her?

If there's a group of girls dancing, should I attempt to penetrate their circle?

What's the most important thing to remember when going to clubs?

(I'm going alone)
 

"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."

Attraction runs on a clock.

She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.

The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."

One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.

Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.

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U

user43770

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AlmostThere! said:
If a girl is just standing around, how do I dance with her?

If a girl is just standing around, I wouldn't try to dance with her. Go ask her why she's standing around, then introduce yourself and initiate game.

If there's a group of girls dancing, should I attempt to penetrate their circle?

Your best bet is to single one of them out.

What's the most important thing to remember when going to clubs?

Don't get too drunk and don't give up. You're going to get shot down more times than not - don't let it phase you.


(I'm going alone)

Not a problem. If a girls asks if I'm alone, I usually tell them my friends are around somewhere.
Good luck out there.
 

Allurre

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Yes, don't ASK the girl to dance.

Instead, ASK why SHE ISN'T DANCING.

If I was to see a girl just standing around glancing at the crowd, I'd walk up to her and ask...

"Mam, I am concerned."

"Is this how you always roll in the club? No dancing, just standing?"

From there, I'll continue with some more bantering to increase her comfort level with my presence.

After getting a clear idea of why she's here, what her name is, how she's feeling toward the night etc. (which should all take less than 5 minutes), I'll then excuse myself to the restroom or for another drink.

Tell her you'll be back.

When you return, you'd have already induced her to a state of comfort and curiosity/excitement to learn more about you.

From here, it'll be much easier to invite her to a dance, as opposed to marching up to a girl and asking her "Do you wanna dance?"
 

Allurre

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Ah, and since you're going alone, try to develop some social proof first.

Meet the other fellas in the club, or look for lone club crawlers like you and befriend them first.
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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YogurtSlinger

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Walk right up to her and try doing the lawnmower. When she asks about you being alone, tell her that all your friends are already mowing someone else's lawns.
 

SBW

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Dunno if it applies worldwide but I'm finding that knowing a few basic "couple" or proper dancing moves works pretty well here.

Preferred lady & I dance like that, not very well TBH but as soon as she tires and finishes a dance, I'm often invited into one or other of the other groups of ladies to spin them round the floor a bit. Some get pretty flirty/touchy-feely when at it too. All you need is to get up once and you can be in demand for ages. She gets right jealous! ;)

So I'm trying to talk her into going to a weekend dance class next month to improve things. :)
 
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