Damn, attracted to a girl with a boyfriend!!!

[vagrant]

I work with a girl, and she knows I like her, and you know how many times she has mentioned her bf? ZERO, ZILCH, NONE. She's never even spoke his name, though I know what it is.

I never hear a word at work. Lets call him J. J and I went out last night, or J and I are going to go to the fair, or J and I are going shopping.

I've not once had her mention to me she does anything with him.

I almost think he doesn't exist. Though he does it just doesn't seem that way.

To me this shows me that she really isn't happy. And in fact i've been told that by her before. She kind of just keeps dating him, and tried to break it off before. She is young, but she has that whole idea of.... I have someone so it must be all good.

What I do is try to prove to her there are better guys out there. Hows this for sad. She had a b-day months ago, and the dirt bag didnt even take her to dinner, nor did he go out to eat with her and her family. Quite honestly, she was upset. Thing is, she knows i'll take her out tomorrow, and i'm not even dating her. Am I going to step on his turf? You bet I am. I see a woman who isn't as happy as she could be, and I know I could make her happy. Not to mention since I know her, it ticks me off she gets treated that way when she deserves better. I deserve her, and he doesn't, plain and simple.

She starts looking at stuff like that, trust me. Now whether it will end up being me over him, who knows. I used to like her before she had a bf, but she wasn't quite 18 and it just wasn't good timing. Now she is, and then some, but now she has a bf.

So what I say. When you know she isn't happy, I say its fine. She wants a reason to break up with him, so we have to give them one.

Now if it is a woman who brags all the time, I dont mess with those. You know she really likes the guy, so move on. The only time I have done this is once, cause I knew the girl for a few years.

Pretty interesting story. I guess I'm gonna have to wait and see cuz right now the boyfriend's in the navy and she got this little new song on myspace that indicates that she isn't happy. I'm all set though. I'm only touching her if she's single!~

 

[jamescr73]

The only way he'll mess up is to start to treat her good.

She's the type that likes to be treated like dirt or else she'd be with you right now.

See and thats whats weird, cause i kinda figured the same thing, but right when she got her own apartment, he started getting weird, and started doing really nice things, and then kinda broke down and told her he wanted to be with her and stuff and then everything was great. I found out from her sister that they were getting along better than ever after he kinda went AFC on her. I figured if he went crawling back she would get rid of him, but it actually drew them closer. Come to find out shes the type of chick that likes the sappy stuff now and then. So one day I did an experiment to see what would happen. I sent her a text message that just said "Hi". She messaged back saying "hey there" and all i said back was "yeah, i was just thinking of you earlier and wanted to say hey". She sent back a message saying "awww", and something else, i forgot. She actually told her sister all about it and it got back to me all about the message and how i was thinking about her.

So now its kinda weird. See im C&F all the time around her. She literally sets herself up with stuff and i crack on her all the time. I give her a solid 8.5 in looks and personality 9+. (Shes crazy just like me). Thing is, she always calls me ****y and i hear back from her sister of course that im too ****y and crap. But its always jokingly, and funny. She used to think i was a total a$$hole, but after she got to know me some over a week period (we probably sent over 1200 text messages while we were both at work that week), she even told me that her opinion of me has changed and that she was starting to like me.

So heres where were at. Boyfriend is an a$$hole that went AFC a little and things went back to normal after the breakup. She thinks im too ****y, but when i throw in a little sappy "i was thinking of you earlier", she goes as far as telling her sister all about it, and it gets all the way back to me. So does this chick really like being treated like dirt? Everything i see here is counter intuitive and ive just decided to kick back for awhile and let dude mess up.

 

[cashc0w]

man for almost all of august i was infatuated with a girl who already had a boyfriend

she obviously liked me, and i liked her

i had opportunities to put moves on her but i didnt

i should have. instead i know her IL is still up but im letting her miss me a little right now.

one time we had a conversationand she said if she continued to hang out with me she would probably kiss me and she doent want to throw away what she has with her boyfriend

right after we had that convo she came over and i didnt kiss her

pretty AFC huh. im not good at this girls with boyfriends thing.

 

[ManOfMystery]

Just go for it! [Half-kidding]

 

[Omen]

Pretty interesting story. I guess I'm gonna have to wait and see cuz right now the boyfriend's in the navy and she got this little new song on myspace that indicates that she isn't happy. I'm all set though. I'm only touching her if she's single!~

See in my case though, I dont think her boyfriend treats her like dirt and is that REAL A@@HOLE, but instead he's just stupid and doesn't know what a relationship is. He cant figure out to take her out, and how to make her happy. Its like his brain is blocked or something.

She had gotten to the point to where she SAYS she is fine with what she has, but i'm betting the sucker will be gone in a matter of months. It might take her a bit cause it might be one of her longest relationships.

When she told me she tried to break it off 2x they always got back together. I think cause she felt lonely, and the mere fact of having someone period was better than being lonely. Now i'm trying to change that and open her damn eyes. In fact, i've told her before about her relationship before I really started to mack, and she goes... You're prob right, I should find better.

And like I said, who knows if she'll have a huge interest in me. I've worked with her for 2yrs almost, so at least i'm not a stranger, and she knows darn well how i'd treat her. Wed I saw her at work and she seemed to be more sincere to me than she has. I haven't even melted her yet with words :yes:

But in her case again, I think its that whole... Many i'd have to start all over again. And you know how it can suck when you have something at least, then you have to go back to point one. You learn a lot about the other person, and when its over, you have to learn again. I think its her biggest problem, and I dont think she really LOVES the guys either. If she did, i'd be hearing about him all the time, and since i've never heard his name spoken to me by her ONCE since she has dated him, it tells me otherwise.

 

[sam3083]

Cheers for the advice stuntman and kontroller, appreciate it.

Heres where I run into trouble. I'm pretty sure she wouldn't cheat on her bf, and I wouldn't want her to. So, how do I get her to leave her bf (which I think she would do), if I can't tell her I like her. Becasue you know how women are - scared of being alone, and would rather be 'in a relationship' then suffer the horrors of being 'single'.

I have known her for a while, and I do C+F, and kino her, which she responds to very well. In fact she probably kino's me even more.

 

[jamescr73]

Cheers for the advice stuntman and kontroller, appreciate it.

Heres where I run into trouble. I'm pretty sure she wouldn't cheat on her bf, and I wouldn't want her to. So, how do I get her to leave her bf (which I think she would do), if I can't tell her I like her. Becasue you know how women are - scared of being alone, and would rather be 'in a relationship' then suffer the horrors of being 'single'.

I have known her for a while, and I do C+F, and kino her, which she responds to very well. In fact she probably kino's me even more.

Same boat man. She knows im interested in her, but of course i cant tell her or "we" are over before it even starts. Current boyfriend needs to hit the road, but shes confused and afraid. She even told me that she was afraid to hook up with me because she has seen the relationships ive gone through lately, and doesnt want to end up like they did. I told her that being afraid to get hurt is like being afraid to get your drivers license because your scared of getting in a wreck. She liked my analogy but said she doesnt want us to end up a wreck, especially cause her sisters boyfriend (of 6 years), is one of my best friends. I see her probably once a week for a minute or two (either with her sister, or at my work) and there is obvious tension and I love it. Im just ready to take it to the next level, but I need to play this chess game perfect or ill be in check mate in no time.

 

[sav]

dont be stupidd....
right now you are being stupid...

believe me when i say THIS WILL NOT END WELL..

the way things start are the way things end...

 

[sam3083]

Well this could be good news for me then Sav:

the way things start are the way things end...

The girl I like, was way into me, a while ago, but I was to scared/AFC/whatever to do anything about it.
And then you know the story; I find sosuave, turn in to DJ, she gets boyfriend, and then I eventually win her over... probably

 

[Omen]

Cheers for the advice stuntman and kontroller, appreciate it.

Heres where I run into trouble. I'm pretty sure she wouldn't cheat on her bf, and I wouldn't want her to. So, how do I get her to leave her bf (which I think she would do), if I can't tell her I like her. Becasue you know how women are - scared of being alone, and would rather be 'in a relationship' then suffer the horrors of being 'single'.

I have known her for a while, and I do C+F, and kino her, which she responds to very well. In fact she probably kino's me even more.

I'm pretty sure this one wouldn't cheat on hers either, and I dont want her to.

So how DO you make them get rid of the guy? Well, in my case since I work with her, and I have made my self much more clearer now than before that I like her, and I interact with her more, I approach it that way. Then I at least have that interaction where I can be around her 2 days a week solely from work and I can do just enough for it to be broken off.

Two... I, YOU can just wait. Sometime we just have to let nature take its course. MOST of the time they break it off after they realize its a waste of their time. Sometimes it takes longer than you want, but nature will run its course and they'll be done for.

I can see this in the girl I know and I like. Its taking its course, and I can bet that by years end it will be over.

You can tell her you like her, but play it off in a non straight up kind of way if you wish.

That's what I did slowly. After a bit i'd end up saying this if she slammed me at work... You use to be my favorite employee, but not anymore. And she'd go... Dont lie to yourself. Little by little I kind of revealed. And now... Well she flat out knows it though I haven't been DIRECT as in say it to her without something else in there. She'll know though the next few times I see her.

And like I said, for me its the mere fact I know the girl, and I feel bad for her she has the relationship she does.

She told me once about the positives of the guy that made up for the other stuff, and this was one of them...

We went shopping for clothes, and I tried on stuff for about 30min and he just sat there with me while I did that.

I asked her if she thought he should deserve a cookie for that. I said... that's nothing special. Most guys just do that in general when their with their gal.

She was trying to justify stupid things in my book she thought were positives. Most of them i'd never think about and just do.

You can tell any woman you like them, but its all in how you do it or the situation. I'm not sure why you think you cant, but you can. That's the only way she is going to know too. You either have to start slow, or go all out. You cant NOT do anything and sit there and wait to see if she likes you. Initiate something with her.