Cyber dating: showing your ''stuff''

[Zirko]

I was wondering what you guys thought about something.

You know on those dating websites you can put pictures of yourself.

Well, I've noticed a lot of guys put pictures of themselves half naked (usually in good shape) [no homo].

Well, I was wondering about that.

To me, it seems a little bit too much a kind of vain but do you think females would find this attractive or consider this as a turn off.

I'm in good shape and I'm happy as to how my body looks but I kind of feel uncomfortable posting shirtless for some reason. It seems silly but then this might just be my AFC side talking.

What's your opinion about this?

 

[PeeGee]

You perceive such guys as being in good shape, then you question their choice to show the fruits of their hard work as 'vain'. I sense somewhere you picked up male shaming tactics.

 

[Erik V]

Zirko, in dating sites you will see many women who write about how they don't like men who put up pictures of themselves with a bare chest. So you might be fooled into thinking all women think the same. The thing is, those women who do like to watch pictures of athletic men with a bare chest will of course not say so in their presentation. It makes them look shallow, according to the current dogma that you are not allowed to appreciate handsomeness/beauty, only the inside counts, etc.

If you are using "dating" websites, your highlights should actually involve your achievements and status in life.

After all, personality is key for women, and what better way than to describe yourself with words, and a with a couple good pics of you having fun in life.

Trust me, women look at the pictures first, just like the men. An attractive guy will have women throwing themselves at him in a dating site, provided his presentation is normal and not weird. An unattractive guy can spend hours perfecting a great presentation following every DJ rule in the book, and almost no woman will care. Which is one reason why I think all those who make threads here about how "Looks don't matter, it's all about game and self-confidence!" need to just .. just stop it. Clichés that cater to the listener's wishes are so tiresome.

 

[Zirko]

OMG half naked hot guys? Got any links? [no homo]

Only if you remove the ''no'' from your [no homo].

I kind of agree with you, Erik V.

 

[salmon]

I've played with some online game, mainly for giggles (there's a lot of "fun" girls online for you to play with). But I've found it's also a pretty easy, non-threatening way to talk to girls about online dating and dating in general.

Some girls just want a gym junkie. It's a little easier to convince them in the field that they might want something different, but online, they can be picky, especially since most are totally inundated with emails, winks and other things, far more than their typical night at a. For me, I'm not interested in a girl who's going to "reject" me simply because I don't have a photo of myself without a shirt.

But the real problem with online dating, as far as I can tell, is that you're giving women too much time to think. They can mull over your profile and your pictures, taking them at face value (sarcasm is really difficult in the written word), and then decide they're not interested. So you have to do as much as you can to show that you're fun, outgoing etc. Showing most girls that you have a big house or an expensive car, on the other hand, seems to be a negative point to them.

And when I see girls who I'm pretty confident I could get to a day-2 at least click the "not interested" button, it just makes me want to get out and meet people in the real world even more...