"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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Crossroads

stevo

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I'm 24, divorced single father. good job and make good living.
She's 19, a dime (but since no one's perfect, we'll call her a 9), in college

After a long time of flirting, i finally escalated and kissed her, she sent me a text asking ''what took so long'' this was Dec '13. She flaked a lot that why kiss took long to happen. She was to come over the next day but again she flaked.

She went back to school a few weeks after, i tried to keep contact going but she went straight no contact and initiated contact a few days before she came back home.

Fast forward to this summer, she said she wants to take it slow but we can have sex..she previously told me she doesn't like friends with benefit.

I went FWB route, she stopped coming over because she said ''all i wanted to do was have sex''.

I went the chill, ''boyfriend'' texting frequently route, spending non sexual time and later she initiated sex again.

We've had sex four times, talked about being exclusive, i gave up my side sex-only chic.

She told me she doesn't want it to be ''just sex'', she's one of those girls that care about their ''body count''. I reassured her it won't be if we put work in to make a relationship work.

She told me she won't tell her best friend about us until she knew there's something here and a few weeks later she told me she told her best friend but the girl already sensed the vibe.

As time went on I asked her to be my girlfriend she said of course just not yet...whatever that means.

She wants us to be 'in the middle' for a while and progress with time but doesn't argue when friends call her my girlfriend. . .

Here we are, she's back in school, this time she texts but she kinda controls our convo in the sense that she could read my text, take hours to respond or not respond at all and since i don't double text she might initiate convo like 2-3 days later, she texts normal then back to the cycle.

I want us to talk on the phone time to time but she says no. she's busy with school work and doesn't like talking on the phone. Here I think she's controlling too only doing what she wants, am i overthinking it?

I want to go up to her school, take her out to dinner (with plans to escalate), she says no, she'll be home soon and really wants to focus on school for right now.

My thinking:

Who doesn't have 2hours on a sunday night for dinner?

I know she goes out, she told she went to a BBQ

When I was in college I had a lot of free time and partied

I won't mind forgetting about her and getting back in the game if she don't have time for me or a relationship and maybe try again when she comes back home but since we talked about exclusivity, my dik/hand's tied.

She says dude's hurt her in the past and I dont want to hurt her but I don't want to come off needy or desperate asking why she just stop responding and don't say nothing for three days straight? I asked her once already and she apologized saying she didn't mean to.

How about I rekindle my previous just-sex side chic, to take my mind off this girl? I have the player reputation I'm trying to come away from so I'm torn.

Is she really that busy?? or just don't have time for me?
Playing games maybe? Power struggle? Over the moon for me but playing hard to get maybe? or is she waiting for ''someone better''?

I'm fine with whatever i just like to know what it is and what it aint so I can plan myself and my heart would eventually follow.


Brothers set me right.
 
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"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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SmooveMooves

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Drop this chick & move on. You're hypnotized because she's a "dime/9" and as a result you're letting her get away with murder. (& Damn near assault too)

Truth is, she wants you to give her the attention she desires of a boyfriend, without necessarily having the title.

Thus, without having the exclusive title, she can fvck, party, mess around, etc. Without having the extra background guilt. Then still return to an older, single father who will give her attention when she sees fit.

She's playing an endless cat and mouse game with you, and that cheese looks good. Just when she feels your attention slipping away she pretends she's serious about being exclusive with you, drawing you back in. Metaphorically, dangling the cheese really close to your nose.

Don't mean to come off as insulting, but im just keeping it 100%.

You have ZERO power in this situation and it's time to cut losses and fvck other better b1tches.

But be wary, because once your attention dissapates, she'll come back full force with max Hp, desperate for it to return.

However, you will just have to have the will to deny her, because now you should be able to see her for just what she is.

A dime piece holding delicious out-of-reach cheese on a string.
 

stevo

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SmooveMooves said:
You have ZERO power in this situation and it's time to cut losses and fvck other better b1tches.

But be wary, because once your attention dissapates, she'll come back full force with max Hp, desperate for it to return.

However, you will just have to have the will to deny her, because now you should be able to see her for just what she is.
After she went NC in Jan, i moved on but boy when I see her though all that attraction comes back and she focuses on just me and i start thinking maybe she really meant sheet and I tryyy again, having good success this time around.

So lost cause? no way to get any power at all? Damn!
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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jurry

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SmooveMooves said:
She's playing an endless cat and mouse game with you, and that cheese looks good.
Haha.. Gold!
 

SmooveMooves

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stevo said:
After she went NC in Jan, i moved on but boy when I see her though all that attraction comes back and she focuses on just me and i start thinking maybe she really meant sheet and I tryyy again, having good success this time around.

So lost cause? no way to get any power at all? Damn!
It's pretty much a loss cause bro.

I know it.

Even you know it too.

You just gotta internalize it, accept it, and move on.

I know she's hot, but, she isn't the last hot girl left.

Move on and don't look back
 

SmooveMooves

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stevo said:
We talked about being exclusive though, you think thats just BS?
TALKING about it is one thing.

Actually DOING IT is another.

Did you guys become seriously exclusive after this chat?

If not, then yes, total BS.
 

stevo

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Alright cool, at least I got to fvck :woo:

Was it something I did though or was it just doomed?

Should I text her I'm getting back on the road or just go NC even if she initiates and just switch to FWB mode?

The ones you want don't know what they want. The ones you don't want keep coming at you. :(
 

stevo

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SmooveMooves said:
TALKING about it is one thing.

Actually DOING IT is another.

Did you guys become seriously exclusive after this chat?

If not, then yes, total BS.
We had the talk before we had seks the first time and didn't fvck no one else. I brought it up again before she went back to school and she said she wasn't a girl that fvcked around and was down to continue being exclusive thats why i feel some type of way fvckin another girl more like breaking promise and sheet. Me ruining what coulda been a good thing
 

"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

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