"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"

I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.

The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.

Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.

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Critique my day game approach routine please.

Bullbearpig

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So I'm relatively new to cold approaching. I've done maybe 25-30 approaches so far and I'm getting pretty comfortable with it and my AA isn't too bad anymore. Im good with the eye contact and voice tonality, but So far my approaches have been pretty bland i think and I need to start adding in some humor and going for more emotional spikes, so here's a start routine I came up with...let me know.
(I like approaching in grocery stores)

Me: excuse me, i noticed you over there and want to say i like your style.
Her: oh, thank you!
Me: (pause for a moment and contemplate) I'm gonna take a guess and say your name is Katie? (Any name will do)
Her: lol...no it's (whatever)
Me: Are you lying?...is it really Katie?
Her: lol no I'm not lying.
Me: (pause) damn, Im usually great at guessing names, Well I was close anyway.(even if I wasn't close)
Her: lol...whats your name?
Me: (give her my name)
Me: so what are you up too tonight?
Her: just getting something for dinner, how about You?
Me: cool, so you have time to fly to Mexico and get married? But only if you're a good cook though!

Blah blah blah...Its a start. Later if she asks me what i do for a living ill say i guess names for the CIA.
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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Serenity

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Me: excuse me, i noticed you over there and want to say i like your style.
That's a pretty bland way to open. You excuse yourself and then compliment, just like pretty much every other guy out there. Why excuse yourself?

Blah blah blah...Its a start. Later if she asks me what i do for a living ill say i guess names for the CIA.
You're missing a great point about humor and emotional spikes, spontaneity. You're doing the exact opposite, planning. Going through a routine will be no less bland. Remember, you gotta have fun with it too and where is the fun in following a script? If you go in blank your brain will have to figure something out on the spot and it will, often better lines than you would have thought of if you deliberately planned your approach. More planning/thinking leads to more inhibitions, what you would want is less of that. As a last point, your interactions will most likely never play out the way you imagine it, at this level of detail people are very unpredictable and you can't plan for every branching possibility of events beforehand.

Drop the routine, don't go in with anything more than maybe an opener. Preferably make the opener up on the spot too using your surroundings, that way it won't seem like a canned opener used a billion times before. That'll suck the blandness right out of it.

Reinterpret any feeling of anxiety into excitement, it's basically the same feeling except anxiety is negative thoughts and excitement is positive thoughts. Avoiding the feeling in any way is the fastest way to be bland.
 

Bullbearpig

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She might have overtly hooked there, but loads don't (even those with very high interest).

Easy is to steer the convo after the open into the topic of location, occupation, what you and/or she are doing atm, etc.

"You look very..." can be quite useful.

Ex. "You look very professional, like perhaps you've just sneaked away from a busy office or something".

It's funny to make out like they are up to some sort of mischief.
Cool man, thanks for the input. What do you mean when you said she may have overtly hooked there?
 

Bullbearpig

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That's a pretty bland way to open. You excuse yourself and then compliment, just like pretty much every other guy out there. Why excuse yourself?


You're missing a great point about humor and emotional spikes, spontaneity. You're doing the exact opposite, planning. Going through a routine will be no less bland. Remember, you gotta have fun with it too and where is the fun in following a script? If you go in blank your brain will have to figure something out on the spot and it will, often better lines than you would have thought of if you deliberately planned your approach. More planning/thinking leads to more inhibitions, what you would want is less of that. As a last point, your interactions will most likely never play out the way you imagine it, at this level of detail people are very unpredictable and you can't plan for every branching possibility of events beforehand.

Drop the routine, don't go in with anything more than maybe an opener. Preferably make the opener up on the spot too using your surroundings, that way it won't seem like a canned opener used a billion times before. That'll suck the blandness right out of it.

Reinterpret any feeling of anxiety into excitement, it's basically the same feeling except anxiety is negative thoughts and excitement is positive thoughts. Avoiding the feeling in any way is the fastest way to be bland.
I only say excuse me to get her attention. I don't say it in a meek way, I say it in a tone that is still commanding attention.

I get what your saying about spontaneity, it's something I need to work on.
 

EyeBRollin

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Opener should be a question about something relevant to the setting.

In a grocery store produce section:

“Excuse me, do you think this organic produce is worth the extra cost?”

Crack a joke.. transition into getting her name, etc.
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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Bullbearpig

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In a grocery store produce section:

“Excuse me, do you think this organic produce is worth the extra cost?”
I like to just go full on direct. I got a number of a chick a few days ago and within the first couple texts just told her "I want one night with you. It will be just between us and I'll never contact you again unless you want me too." I just wanted to see her reaction, I didn't care either way.
 

Bullbearpig

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So I tried this out today, very pleased with the results. It was well received from the women. Got 2 out of 4 numbers.
On a side note...I got my first insta-date the other day...pretty cool.
 
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Atom Smasher

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It's interesting how game works... What works for one guy can be utterly impossible to pull off for a different one. This has to do with congruence with your personality, methinks.

I say if it's working, use it. Be ready to modify and improve, and of course keep options open for spontaneity.
 

Bullbearpig

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It's interesting how game works... What works for one guy can be utterly impossible to pull off for a different one. This has to do with congruence with your personality, methinks.

I say if it's working, use it. Be ready to modify and improve, and of course keep options open for spontaneity.
Im always trying to modify and improve. I feel like I had an epiphany today...I need to up the blatant sexuality in my approaches.
 

oldmanofthesea

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I agree with Grewd and was going to post something similar. The trouble with canned type lines/routines is that they come off as impersonal and women can sense that they are just another faceless number in the masses of women you probably approach (even if that's not true). It sucks because it's obviously a lot easier to have a witty routine that is well-practiced to reduce AA but the results won't be as good as just being in the moment, genuine, and authentic. And if you are too comfortable and confident, it comes off the same. At least, it has for me.

Be witty but not overly. It can come off as trying too hard. Instead, focus on being GENUINELY curious about her. Ask questions and don't just wait for her to finish talking so you can get your next question or joke out. Really listen, think, and ask her deeper questions about what she said. Insert some humor here and there. This is what I've found to work best for me.
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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EyeBRollin

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I like to just go full on direct. I got a number of a chick a few days ago and within the first couple texts just told her "I want one night with you. It will be just between us and I'll never contact you again unless you want me too." I just wanted to see her reaction, I didn't care either way.
If you try that line 100 times it will work with someone. I try to maximize odds though. It’s not a good line.. but keep trying! It will work eventually!
 
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