"The Kiss of Death Mistake"

You replay the conversation at 2 a.m. She texted back fast yesterday. Today, nothing. Was that smile friendly or flirty? What did the shoulder touch mean?

Every hour you spend decoding her signals drains your confidence and hands her the controls. Women can sense that insecurity from across the room — and it repels them.

One of the "22 Rules" kills the obsession on the spot: assume she likes you, and act accordingly. Sounds too simple. Works anyway.

Her interest tends to rise to meet your expectations. Psychologists call it a self-fulfilling prophecy.

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Crazy Girlfriend

theNEWDJ

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I have been with my girlfriend for 5 and a half months and all and all it has been pretty great. Thanks to the techniques i have learned from this site she has grown to have extreme attracton for me. Now she is talking about getting married to me, I am only a freshman in college she is a sophmore. She has real bad depressive mood swings and i am worried that if i break up with her she will commit suicide. I do i lower the attraction so that she doesnt care so deeply about me?
 

"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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theNEWDJ

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I have already changed the way i act around her like instead of acting confident i act like a wuss and apologize for everything and try to make myself as weak as possible. its actually kind of funny but its i think it may be neccessarry
 

Juan_Man

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If you are really into her, then this shouldn't be a problem. Keep being a DJ. However, if you are losing interest in her, then this can be a problem, especially if she starts becoming obsessive. Figure out where you two stand first before deciding if you want her to lose interest in you.
 

theNEWDJ

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it sucks cause she really loves me and i really like her but, not that much tho
 

TesuqueRed

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"really loves"--? yeah, sure. for a freshman and a sophmore in college, it feels like that. when you're 30 yrs old someday you'll look back and see "first intense relationship one step up from a serious crush."

but, like, (porky pig voice here) weally twue wuv?

doubt it.

you can try the AFC route, and it may work, too. it'll take some time and a lot of effort and you'll get the drama anyway. i've noticed this method appeals to those who want to avoid a confrontation. it's for those not ready to step up, take responsibility and define for themselves how their life will be conducted.

when you make it crystal clear to yourself what you are about, what you're doing and how you want to live, you can then lay it out there to other people in your life without apology.

i'd suggest being straight up and level. don't make it a long, involved explanation, don't apologize, don't make it heavy --- just keep it level and simple and state "i am 19 yrs old and nowhere near ready for marriage at this time and probably won't be until i'm at least 25. i like being with you, but talk of marriage is getting way too heavy and ahead of things right now."

if she argues or gets manipulative, just keep repeating the above

funny - isn't it? - how you're doing a job on yourself with the "i'm afraid to break up with her because she might commit suicide." if that's the way things really are, you're in a sick relationship and should get out.

try the direct straight-up approach; it's faster, better for you and won't take as much out of you. who knows, maybe she can deal with honesty better than games and manipulation.
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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theNEWDJ

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thanks for your feedback...

it is amazing how much a girl will take if you give her a little bit, if u start acting dorky and letting a girl walk all over you they will take advantage of it right away.

my fear of her commiting suicide is very real, i wouldnt make it up. I dont think its "love" i think its extreme attraction. A few times shes said that she has been depressed enough to commit suicide. I really like her but the negativitiy is really getting to me. Im trying to decrease the attraction but its hard because im like all shes got all of her friends ditched her too.
 

Call_Me_Daddy

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Your new favorite band is Maroon5. You are desperately in love with her and are contemplating suicide if she ever leaves you (you tell her this).

Also hang out with her everyday. As much time as possible. Start talking about alot of stupid ****. Don't wash as much and try to do more sweaty exercise to get a really pungent smell. (wash your hands though. you don't want to get an infection or something). And try to eat as horrendously as possible. (fork? what's that?)
 

Call_Me_Daddy

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theNEWDJ said:
Im trying to decrease the attraction but its hard because im like all shes got all of her friends ditched her too.
Ouch. If you really give a **** about her, you might want to push her to see a shrink. She might have some underlying problems.

Introducing her to new people will also help to take the focus of you. Try to find some people she can be friends with so she will spend plenty of time with them.


I think she is hanging onto you out of desperation since she doesn't want to be all alone.
 

TsubiS

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Dude! get out while you can! had a crazy gf.. turned suicidal..

depressional moodswings aint something u want raising ur kids.
 

rben69

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The guy I used to live with called it 'the act like an idiot trick'..

He said just start acting like an idiot and the main example was 'pull your pants down in the supermarket' and 'crap yourself in front of her'.. he said a few of his friends tried it and it worked for them!

Though I thought it was really funny, I decided that id respect myself more if I actually broke up with her..

She was ****ing nuts, and I thought the same thing, we got back together like 5 times, which was dumb..

In the end I realized I need to respect myself more than anybody else and end it..
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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Nighthawk

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Let her catch you dressed up in her clothes and make-up. May backfire if she's into it.
 
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theNEWDJ said:
...She has real bad depressive mood swings and i am worried that if i break up with her she w ill commit suicide.
To prevent her from comitting suicide, kill her!!! Problem solved!!!:rolleyes:
 

KarmaSutra

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Youngblood, If you fall for the "I'll kill myself if you leave" bullsh!t you'll never ever go anywhere in your progression to manhood. You are not responsible for her lack of commitment to herself and her own well being.

Have her ass Baker acted then after 3 weeks in a real nuthouse yo ucan check on her and see how she is. If she still acts the same way or worse leave the b!tch alone.
 

theNEWDJ

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damn you guys have so good ideas acting like an idiot will help alot and letting her push me around and act like a *****, its gonna suck doing it but ill feel good about myself knowing that i prevented a girl from suicide
 

Call_Me_Daddy

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Take her to see a shrink. Find a young male doctor. Force her to see him a few times a week and then slowly remove yourself from the picture.

Problem solved.
 

"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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