Crash and Burn

[hamelech]

I think I might be taking this DJing stuff too far...I went out with this 10 saturday and basically made a Jackass :moon: out of myself...(if you want to see the background look at my other post "first post--first phone conversation") I think it works good to break the ice but it seems for me...I need to lay off of it once I'm in...Not turn into a chump but go more sweet talking player...than ****y funny...This is what's worked better for me in the past...I went from her telling me "You really have great instincts" and making her smile and laugh constantly on the first meeting to getting a complete iceberg shoulder on the second...It was just one of those situations where you can see things slipping more and more out of your control...I tried to clear my head and think logically but it spiraled out of control...Anyway, just thought I'd share.

 

[hamelech]

and the other thing I forgot to add is I once again made the mistake of agreeing to a group date...I didn't want to but neither of us has a car so she had to get her friends to bring her...Group dates are cool if you're with a group too but 1 against four just isn't good odds...what makes it harder is the other friends were like 4, 5 and 6...So they're not getting attention from other guys...They're living vicariously through they're beautiful friend and ****blocking in 2 languages. (They all speak Hebrew too, which I can only say some basic phrases)

 

[Ace of Flames]

People always either take C+F too far or don't use it enough/at all. Is it really so hard to strike a balance? I'm not attacking you or anything, hamelech, but making a point.

You have to let it flow. Say hi, ask what's up, then counter whatever she says with c+f. She laughs, then you go on and tell her what's up with you. Change subjects with some c+f, talk about that for awhile, then go for the number. If you get it, then close with c+f and leave. Its just something you have to throw in there every now and then.

Also, c+f is something you use on the surface. By that I mean, when you're getting pretty intimate with a girl and she's opening up to you, don't be an a$$hole and get ****y over something she's vulnerable about. C+F is for light convos. When the topic really matters, try to be a little more serious.

 

[hamelech]

People always either take C+F too far or don't use it enough/at all. Is it really so hard to strike a balance?

Yeah really it is...and the balance changes from one girl to the next...I think I'm going to tone down the ****y and eliminate neg hits unless I'm getting attitude from her.

 

[Cod3r]

I learned this lesson about 1 1/2 years back... hard lesson it was, good thing it was on a TEST subject !!

I cnf and she loved me over guys who def. were better looking, she was spanish (i'm black) she was spanish and we all know spanish girls love spanish guys, but I got her by always calling her 'crybaby' and things like... "aww the little babie's pouting ! soo cute" and after a week she was hooked... started hanging out after class... ect.. ect...

Next few months, I kept it up and one day she SNAPPED on me. I'm talking about really seriously like... "wtf is up with you, why u always gotta be a smart-ass... seriously keep it up and i'ma smack u in the face"... The crap shocked me and I stopped cuz i was shocked, went back to normal mode and things returned to normal... u gotta have a perfect balance for cnf my man !


-Cod3r