Pap
Don Juan
Hey all,
For those of you who missed it, this was an interview
posted on Cliff's List with Style, who's a good friend
of Mystery's and one of the trainers at the MM
workshops. Style is one of the most innovative PUAs
out there, and has developed much of the technology
that is now common use, including false time
constraints and opinion openers. He was the guy who
personally kicked my ass and jumped my game into high
gear, that this interview is pure $$$$. You can all
learn a lot from this guy, so read and re-read this
sucker when you get a chance.
Sarge on,
Papa
**************************************************
INTERVIEW WITH STYLE:
Clifford: Before I get into this, I want to tell you
that I greatly appreciate your time and effort in
writing this email and in the mind set that you have
expressed here. Too many guys get good and then just
spend their time getting laid and don't bother with
the community. I can understand it - but I can also
tell you that I for one appreciate your sticking
around to help.
Style: Thanks man. I've been having a lot of
adventures lately, but still always know I can get
better too. So I'm there to share as well as learn. I
know no one--even the gurus--who couldn't benefit with
continuing to learn. It's like golf. Even Tiger Woods
can't get a hole in one every time.
Clifford: The first question is what exactly are you
doing to keep these women on the string - it appears
that you have quite a stable but I get the impression
that you are not seeing them very often yet when you
do you are doing them. Most of the other guys I see
with several women seem to have to see them at least
once every week or two to keep the connection fresh -
I can understand about the ones out of town, but the
local ones I am curious about.
Style: Yeah, you're right. I do have women I see
weekly, monthly, or sometimes even once every six
months. And it's always on. None of these I would
consider an LTR. Never thought of it as strange
though. Would be interesting to figure out why that is
so. I think it may be because I am not jealous: I know
they have other lovers or even bfs, they assume I have
other lovers and probably gfs, but we can get together
and have great sex without complications. I also let
them know I'm very busy and don't have a lot of free
time, but I will make time for them when I can.
Clifford: Here's what particularly interests me. I am
focused usually on what changed, or what happened to
make someone go from unsuccessful (or less successful)
to great success. What made the difference, how do you
think differently now from the way you did before, how
would you suggest someone best accomplish the change
for themselves? Personally, I have some success but I
haven't been able to get it to the level that I want.
The key thing is to try and benefit from others'
experiences and make changes/corrections in the
shortest time possible.
Style: Yes, this has been one of my biggest concerns
here. Some guys improve, others are just treading
water and getting nowhere. They become good in their
heads and not the real world. I've noticed that there
are three types of people:
I. Approach machines, like Papa. These guys tend to
improve their game the quickest, because they have no
fear. However, guys who are approach machines are also
guys who tend to know the LEAST about social dynamics.
They are just walking PU machines following a
flowchart. So they end up with a tight 20 minutes, but
over the long term have problems getting a girlfriend
because they run out of material.
2. Guys who are smart about social dynamics and
socially well adjusted, however, tend to be shyer
about making approaches. They need to push themselves
more. But, if they can get over the fear of
approaching, then they tend to do well because they
are good and interesting conversationalists, and
basically once they add the new insights, patterns of
behavior, and material, they tend to have the option
of beautiful girlfriends.
3. Guys who are very set in their ways. These range
from total nerds to very cool guys. But the problem is
they can take in all this knowledge, but they can't
change the way they act. Their learned patterns of
behaviour and inner beliefs about themselves are so
strong that they can't do anything that's not "them"
and doesn't fit into their frame. Thus, they end up
with a great understanding of the game, but their rate
of success does not change.
Each type of person here needs a different method of
getting past his sticking points and improving, and
some take more work than others. All, however, have a
place where they hit a wall and it takes great effort
to get past it.
In my opinion, here is how you improve. First of all,
you approach. This is obvious. But approaching is
nothing if you can not take a step back afterwards and
calibrate, and figure out where you went right and
wrong, and then fix it. The way I learned was that I
small-chunked material into my game. My goal was just
to open at first, so I wrote down a handful of
openers. Then I used them until I could open easily.
Because I am a cautious person and do not like
"failure," I made sure my openers had a HIGH success
rate. (I believe that the openers I came up with--the
jealous girlfriend, dental floss, the spells story,
and so on--are some of the easiest and most
successful.) I naturally put forced time-constraints
into my PUs ("I can only stay for a minute, because my
friends are waiting for me, but really quickly...")
and these turned out to be gold, and Mystery and TD
now teach them. Again, I wanted to minimize failure.
Next , I figured out how to continue the conversation
and hook the girl. These are the IVDs I posted
about--easy routines to generate interest and convey
value. Once I had that done, I learned how to generate
rapport and then make an emotional connection and then
make a physical connection. Next, I added in all the
ACCELERATORS--challenges, push-pull, ****y/funny, and
so on. At some of these points, I was stuck for
months. And every so often, I still regress and have
to re-learn a certain stage of the game all over
again. For each of these stages, I wrote down a few
routines and put them on a cheat sheet which I always
keep in my back pocket. It's like a security blanket.
For those of you who missed it, this was an interview
posted on Cliff's List with Style, who's a good friend
of Mystery's and one of the trainers at the MM
workshops. Style is one of the most innovative PUAs
out there, and has developed much of the technology
that is now common use, including false time
constraints and opinion openers. He was the guy who
personally kicked my ass and jumped my game into high
gear, that this interview is pure $$$$. You can all
learn a lot from this guy, so read and re-read this
sucker when you get a chance.
Sarge on,
Papa
**************************************************
INTERVIEW WITH STYLE:
Clifford: Before I get into this, I want to tell you
that I greatly appreciate your time and effort in
writing this email and in the mind set that you have
expressed here. Too many guys get good and then just
spend their time getting laid and don't bother with
the community. I can understand it - but I can also
tell you that I for one appreciate your sticking
around to help.
Style: Thanks man. I've been having a lot of
adventures lately, but still always know I can get
better too. So I'm there to share as well as learn. I
know no one--even the gurus--who couldn't benefit with
continuing to learn. It's like golf. Even Tiger Woods
can't get a hole in one every time.
Clifford: The first question is what exactly are you
doing to keep these women on the string - it appears
that you have quite a stable but I get the impression
that you are not seeing them very often yet when you
do you are doing them. Most of the other guys I see
with several women seem to have to see them at least
once every week or two to keep the connection fresh -
I can understand about the ones out of town, but the
local ones I am curious about.
Style: Yeah, you're right. I do have women I see
weekly, monthly, or sometimes even once every six
months. And it's always on. None of these I would
consider an LTR. Never thought of it as strange
though. Would be interesting to figure out why that is
so. I think it may be because I am not jealous: I know
they have other lovers or even bfs, they assume I have
other lovers and probably gfs, but we can get together
and have great sex without complications. I also let
them know I'm very busy and don't have a lot of free
time, but I will make time for them when I can.
Clifford: Here's what particularly interests me. I am
focused usually on what changed, or what happened to
make someone go from unsuccessful (or less successful)
to great success. What made the difference, how do you
think differently now from the way you did before, how
would you suggest someone best accomplish the change
for themselves? Personally, I have some success but I
haven't been able to get it to the level that I want.
The key thing is to try and benefit from others'
experiences and make changes/corrections in the
shortest time possible.
Style: Yes, this has been one of my biggest concerns
here. Some guys improve, others are just treading
water and getting nowhere. They become good in their
heads and not the real world. I've noticed that there
are three types of people:
I. Approach machines, like Papa. These guys tend to
improve their game the quickest, because they have no
fear. However, guys who are approach machines are also
guys who tend to know the LEAST about social dynamics.
They are just walking PU machines following a
flowchart. So they end up with a tight 20 minutes, but
over the long term have problems getting a girlfriend
because they run out of material.
2. Guys who are smart about social dynamics and
socially well adjusted, however, tend to be shyer
about making approaches. They need to push themselves
more. But, if they can get over the fear of
approaching, then they tend to do well because they
are good and interesting conversationalists, and
basically once they add the new insights, patterns of
behavior, and material, they tend to have the option
of beautiful girlfriends.
3. Guys who are very set in their ways. These range
from total nerds to very cool guys. But the problem is
they can take in all this knowledge, but they can't
change the way they act. Their learned patterns of
behaviour and inner beliefs about themselves are so
strong that they can't do anything that's not "them"
and doesn't fit into their frame. Thus, they end up
with a great understanding of the game, but their rate
of success does not change.
Each type of person here needs a different method of
getting past his sticking points and improving, and
some take more work than others. All, however, have a
place where they hit a wall and it takes great effort
to get past it.
In my opinion, here is how you improve. First of all,
you approach. This is obvious. But approaching is
nothing if you can not take a step back afterwards and
calibrate, and figure out where you went right and
wrong, and then fix it. The way I learned was that I
small-chunked material into my game. My goal was just
to open at first, so I wrote down a handful of
openers. Then I used them until I could open easily.
Because I am a cautious person and do not like
"failure," I made sure my openers had a HIGH success
rate. (I believe that the openers I came up with--the
jealous girlfriend, dental floss, the spells story,
and so on--are some of the easiest and most
successful.) I naturally put forced time-constraints
into my PUs ("I can only stay for a minute, because my
friends are waiting for me, but really quickly...")
and these turned out to be gold, and Mystery and TD
now teach them. Again, I wanted to minimize failure.
Next , I figured out how to continue the conversation
and hook the girl. These are the IVDs I posted
about--easy routines to generate interest and convey
value. Once I had that done, I learned how to generate
rapport and then make an emotional connection and then
make a physical connection. Next, I added in all the
ACCELERATORS--challenges, push-pull, ****y/funny, and
so on. At some of these points, I was stuck for
months. And every so often, I still regress and have
to re-learn a certain stage of the game all over
again. For each of these stages, I wrote down a few
routines and put them on a cheat sheet which I always
keep in my back pocket. It's like a security blanket.
