could use some help with a few life issues...

[Big Eee Zee]

Hey guys, whatup. This is a repost from general forums, because i've found that the people that have been on this planet longer almost ALWAYS have much more useful things to say. Maybe you all can help me...


dating this girl for a while. About a year now. Shes lots of fun, smart, and pretty good looking. We used to have the most incredible sex ever. Like, we'd have sex on and off until 7 in the morning. It was amazing. However, recently my life has been a lot...****tier. school is difficult, my cars are constantly breaking, my old motorcycle has been waiting to be finished for like 3 months (i HATE it when I cant ride) and I dont have time to fix any of that. Also, my mom is dying of cancer, but its like eating her brain so she is slowly going crazy too...its prolly the most difficult thing i've ever dealt with and she realistically has a month or two left.

im not looking for pity, trust me i've gotten pretty good at dealing with this ****. but lately I think its been affecting my relationship. I just...dont want sex all that much. i havent been giving my g/f what she needs. we will have sex for like 10, maybe 15 minutes. if I dont finish early, i'll just lose it half way through. And, that makes me anxious and frustrated, which further compounds my problem. I shouldnt be dealing with this at 21...sigh.

My woman has been understanding, and keeps saying that she loves me and will work through this with me. I love her for that, and I trust her, but theres only so much of this she (or anyone) could take. If I lost her i'd be alright, but I dont wanna lose a relationship over something like this.

I also cant just wait until I'm less stressed with my life. Im gonna be eating better, no more porn (duh) and im gonna be starting an intense workout routine. Anyone have ANY ideas on this?

Sorry to sound like a whiny *****, but honestly my life has been pretty rough the last few months...
__________________

 

[sodbuster]

If it doesn't kill you, it will make you stronger. As long as you can gut it out, it will improve you[if you don't turn negative]. The Romans used farm boys as soldiers because they were used to being out in bad weather and hard work-built an empire. In todays environment, do you know of any rich kids in professional sports[other than pro-athletes kids]? For the most part, you have kids from industrial towns,the ghetto, and farm/small towns.

As long as you don't whine and remind her of a little boy,you'll be able to keep your GF[women don't want to sleep with a little boy] You can share your feelings with close friends,just not your GF[no matter how much she wants you to share,she doesn't want to know you aren't in control].

Been there,done that as far as school[dental school]-you'll get through it,just keep moving forward.

 

[sodbuster]

Forgot to add, the lack of interest in sex is normal-you aren't worried about getting laid when you are getting shot at,etc.. Survival is the first level of the pyramid,sex is later.
Start exercising and eating right NOW. Exercise will burn off some of the stress[4 years of karate during dental school][maybe you need to join a class where someone will push you]

 

[Big Eee Zee]

those are some good points, maybe some kinda physical class would help...

i'll look into that. I just feel bad that right now I'm the one with the low sex drive. I know that its not something i can control to an extent, but still...my woman is being the best i could ask for about this, i just dont want to push my luck in the matter...

 

[OneEyedJack]

High stress is the reason for your low sex drive. You are normal, it is ok, just ride it out.

Also, it might be good for you to talk to your gf (not during sex) that your low sex drive is temporary and ask for understanding.