"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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could use some encouragement

wutang23

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I tried to make my first move on a girl the other day and get this girls number and she flaked on me. I'm feeling kinda down and don't have the motivation to try again with another girl. Any words of advice to get me back at it and try again with a different girl?
Thanks
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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SinJester

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Dude if you get this upset over every girl that rejects you then you will never ever be a DJ or a pimp. You have to learn to live with rejection.

The thing is, you got rejected, but it was a failure. It was a success because you got experiance, and that is the important thing. You shouldn't be down that she flaked, you should be damn proud of yourself that you made the move and got her number. It is way more than some guys will ever do.
 

eaglez1177

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SinJester said:
Dude if you get this upset over every girl that rejects you then you will never ever be a DJ or a pimp. You have to learn to live with rejection.

The thing is, you got rejected, but it was a failure. It was a success because you got experiance, and that is the important thing. You shouldn't be down that she flaked, you should be damn proud of yourself that you made the move and got her number. It is way more than some guys will ever do.
Great advice

You should be proud of yourself that you had the balls to do what most guys cant do.
 

Bling

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Bro, I feel for you. You're on your way to being a DJ. You've probably approached more girls than the jockey that responded.

The best thing I can tell you, and it takes a ton of practice and a ton of maturity to realize you control your emotions. I have the discipline to just look at myself, and say what the p***? ***** is *****. You've got to keep going, bro. It'll get better as the days go on. Approach 10 more, and then tell me. I've heard of people approaching 100, and not getting a girlfriend. I can tell you that I can think of eight girls I've liked since my first girlfriend. Only one ended up being my current girlfriend. Six of which I actually talked to, five of which could count as cold approaching (the final one I told her friend. :down: ). 1/8 is a what, 12.5% success rate? Hard as balls? Yup. But deep down, there's some strength there. You can do it.
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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SinJester

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Bro, I feel for you. You're on your way to being a DJ. You've probably approached more girls than the jockey that responded.
Um, thanks?

There are some older guys here who have done 1000 aproaches. You think they cared if they got rejected on the 1000th time? I wouldn't bet on it.
 

DJ_Matthew

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wutang23 said:
I tried to make my first move on a girl the other day and get this girls number and she flaked on me. I'm feeling kinda down and don't have the motivation to try again with another girl. Any words of advice to get me back at it and try again with a different girl?
Thanks
Get used to it buddy, it's going to happen a lot.
 

wutang23

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thanks for the responses guys, my older brother (who is really good with girls) told me that i over think girls way too much, and the key is just not care what girls think of you, and by doing this its so much easier to get girls because you have no fear, and its attractive to them. So i went up to the girl who flaked on me and busted her balls about it, and now shes on my nuts. What I'm asking you Djs is my brothers advice correct, or did it only work in this case?
 

Porky04

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No, he is bone idle correct. If attraction is all about superiority, you showed her you were superior than her by busting her for turning you (of all the people in the world!) down. Like she is obviously a mental case and deserves no admiration.

Equally, if you don't give a damn what they think of you, it shows that they are beneath you, because frankly, they should give a damn what you think about them, not the other way around. Pick fun at a girl, and she wonders "why doesn't he like me?" and will effectively beg for your attention.

* * *

And as for your motivation, don't see getting a phone number as a win lose situation. Consider it as an experiment. Try something, say something out of the ordinary, just to see the response. If it works, then do it on the next girl (again, as an experiment). If it doesn't then don't try it again. This way it is fun, you learn something, your ego and confidance grows, and you come off perfectly not giving a damn what they think. Infact, there came a point in me that I didn't even see girls as targets, but more as a drawing board to try things on.

Hope it helps
 

"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."

Attraction runs on a clock.

She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.

The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."

One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.

Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.

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