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Cost of a Relationship

Blacksheep

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Does anyone ever calculated the cost of maintaining a relationship?

I'm thinking about that and made some calculations, cause I pay like 97% (based on some weekends I got receipts) and she helps me estimated with 13% of everything we spent (gas + foods and recreation).

On a weekend I don't spend too much it's about R$250,00 per weekend. I'm Using Brazilian currency cause I know some stuffs is not the same price in another countries.

So in one month I spent R$1.000,00 in that relationship.
In one year its equals to R$12.000,00

I earn R$6.000,00 on average. I live by myself so I have to pay my home bills, car bills and my own food and basic needs + alimony to my son (not with that girl).

She is unemployed and is starting to earn some money with makeup business, but she always says that she try to help me with everything she can (R$30,00 to R$50,00 estimated, but in some weekends I pay for everything).

I got really angry when she had a friend wedding and found money to buy her dress, cause I asked her before: so, do you prefer to spend money with a dress to go on that wedding even if you don't have money for that instead of cancelling it to help me with the things we have to buy on weekends? It's ****ing easy don't?

I try to have common sense, but I think even that she doesn't have so much conditions to help me, shouldn't she talk about that or express that she cares? Cause sometimes I don't see much concern on her part.

It's getting hard to carry this by myself and sometimes I've tried to talk to her about that she got sad and said that she is feeling useless that she can't help me. But to fight with me about this wedding and find a way to buy her dress, she did that. Or Im going crazy or this is really controversial.

Would like to hear what you think about that.
 

Alvafe

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you mean for real or the jokes about using prostitutes is cheaper then dating?

if for real of course you will spend, staying at home is a hell a lot cheaper then going out
 

Blacksheep

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you mean for real or the jokes about using prostitutes is cheaper then dating?

if for real of course you will spend, staying at home is a hell a lot cheaper then going out
This calculations was about a LTR, not like going out and dating multiple girls (that also has costs).

Those costs I showed here was basically things only to stay home. If I used to go out every weekend with her to bars and parties it would be ****ing expensive.

The only thing I do different is like barbecue with friends or spending the weekend in my uncle's farm.

But idk, maybe the man should always hold those costs and thinking that a woman would in any way help you sharing those costs is just a illusion.
 

Alvafe

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ltr or not ltr, you will still going out, giving parties is also going out, even if is on your home, the good with friends is everyone pay for thenselfs. and serious here you are well paid, you shouldn't wwrry too much about costs, but yes trying to invest most of it, i'm frugal in most of my dealings and tend to go for pay upfront so I can get some discount,

you could also use this cost as a way to see how you GF LTR is, if she never pays for anything, well it really a bad deal for you, you can also look for cheaper places, she certainly don't have money to go to expensive places, so look for cheap places, and if that become a problem, you know what her deal is

some people on this forum said they used the i'm poor now as a sh!t test on her, something like I lost my job and have no money now and keep this up for some time and see what her deal would be, its not a wonder most don't pass
 

Blacksheep

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some people on this forum said they used the i'm poor now as a sh!t test on her, something like I lost my job and have no money now and keep this up for some time and see what her deal would be, its not a wonder most don't pass
Gonna observe how she will react with a situation like that. I've already think about doing this test to see her reaction.

Anyways, she has some good qualities, like she doesn't care about going out to expensive places... so we don't have to spend too much.
 

stovepipe

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Relationship Pu$$y ain't cheap!
 

DEEZEDBRAH

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Does anyone ever calculated the cost of maintaining a relationship?

I'm thinking about that and made some calculations, cause I pay like 97% (based on some weekends I got receipts) and she helps me estimated with 13% of everything we spent (gas + foods and recreation).

On a weekend I don't spend too much it's about R$250,00 per weekend. I'm Using Brazilian currency cause I know some stuffs is not the same price in another countries.

So in one month I spent R$1.000,00 in that relationship.
In one year its equals to R$12.000,00

I earn R$6.000,00 on average. I live by myself so I have to pay my home bills, car bills and my own food and basic needs + alimony to my son (not with that girl).

She is unemployed and is starting to earn some money with makeup business, but she always says that she try to help me with everything she can (R$30,00 to R$50,00 estimated, but in some weekends I pay for everything).

I got really angry when she had a friend wedding and found money to buy her dress, cause I asked her before: so, do you prefer to spend money with a dress to go on that wedding even if you don't have money for that instead of cancelling it to help me with the things we have to buy on weekends? It's ****ing easy don't?

I try to have common sense, but I think even that she doesn't have so much conditions to help me, shouldn't she talk about that or express that she cares? Cause sometimes I don't see much concern on her part.

It's getting hard to carry this by myself and sometimes I've tried to talk to her about that she got sad and said that she is feeling useless that she can't help me. But to fight with me about this wedding and find a way to buy her dress, she did that. Or Im going crazy or this is really controversial.

Would like to hear what you think about that.
Bachelor pad economics ftw!

My expenses are minimal. There's a minimalist YouTuber who spends 24k with a wife and 2 kids. A bachelor can spend even less.II have no payments outside of my mortgage which i am aggressively zeroing out (1* per year to pay % on exactly principle). No car payments. I cook from home. I don't drink. I mostly eat chicken breasts and broccoli. On that shred diet.

I cannot fathom what blue pill men squander in lifetime resources, energy, and time. I have no live in gf or wife. Toxic mood or attitude is grounds for dismissal.

Mate, she's not to blame. You are. You are holding up the fort, playing house, and she is taking because you are giving. Its wackkk. Monogamy is cucked. Its a good thing for women that can have access to your resources once SMV is decayed.
 

Blacksheep

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I cannot fathom what blue pill men squander in lifetime resources, energy, and time. I have no live in gf or wife. Toxic mood or attitude is grounds for dismissal.

Mate, she's not to blame. You are. You are holding up the fort, playing house, and she is taking because you are giving. Its wackkk. Monogamy is cucked. Its a good thing for women that can have access to your resources once SMV is decayed.
That's scaring a hard to digest, but it's true... I'm 100% sure that this is all my fault, cause I'm responsible for allowing those things to happen.

And I'm understanding some past experiences that made me feel guilty and slave from those ****s. And no one can solve it for me other than myself.

I feel like a volcano about to explode, many illusions that I believed and today I see that it was all a lie, and even though it's hard, I open my eyes ... and at the same time it's like I'm tearing my own flesh.
 

AttackFormation

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Whatever you're talking about is the cost of being weak rather than having selfrespect, not the cost of a "relationship". Don't blame the abstract concept for your own behavior. I can't identify at all with women "costing" anything except what time and energy I choose to put into them. Why could that be?
 

Epic Days

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That's scaring a hard to digest, but it's true... I'm 100% sure that this is all my fault, cause I'm responsible for allowing those things to happen.
Saying that you allowed it to happen is still a shift to her. Think about it.

You promoted it. Look at this hard. When it’s all you, start to finish and your needy sex needs.
 

Blacksheep

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Whatever you're talking about is the cost of being weak rather than having selfrespect, not the cost of a "relationship". Don't blame the abstract concept for your own behavior. I can't identify at all with women "costing" anything except what time and energy I choose to put into them. Why could that be?
Yes, I've always behaved like that and it seems now I'm starting to open my eyes... but I'm making a lot of mistakes yet.

Today I can talk about it with a girl and ask her to help with costs, but in my past relationships I was acting worse, I just paid for everything... and now that I'm working to improve myself, is a bit painfull to see the way I used to behave.

I found out that, as I had some issues in my chilhood when I tried to make a decision to do something I like (Swimming, sports, RPG games, etc) I was supressed and rejected by my father ("You're wasting time", "You're such a loser", "You do everything wrong"). It seems that this created an emotional need to seek approval/validation for everything I do and I got stucked when I try to make my own decisions because of this unconscious emotion that persists in my adult life. It's like I feel guilty or feel this need to validate my decisions everytime I try to be myself.

I have to learn to assume responsibility for my own life... and train my mind to don't care about others opinions or criticism.

Every feedback I got here I try to use it to help me understand, even if it's difficult to accept, I really want to get out of it.
 

Spaz

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If I can't afford to go to an up scale restaurant or bar then I'd find an alternative that's cheap.

But I'd pay for everything.

It's my default setting.
 

Blacksheep

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If I can't afford to go to an up scale restaurant or bar then I'd find an alternative that's cheap.

But I'd pay for everything.

It's my default setting.
It's how I'm doing too.

But with this weight on the back comes the emotional weight, cause (based on my life experiences) I never in my life dated a woman that recognized this financial effort to afford the relationship.

They start blaming of not giving them the attention they want so much because we're focused on building our career and projects.

I'm in a point that I even don't give a f*ck for those behaviors... Im ignoring those messages or blames and keep doing what's my priority.
 

Spaz

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It's how I'm doing too.

But with this weight on the back comes the emotional weight, cause (based on my life experiences) I never in my life dated a woman that recognized this financial effort to afford the relationship.

They start blaming of not giving them the attention they want so much because we're focused on building our career and projects.

I'm in a point that I even don't give a f*ck for those behaviors... Im ignoring those messages or blames and keep doing what's my priority.
Masculinity and femininity.

Do ur masculine part like providing/fixing whilst she does her part like making breakfast/entertainment.

Balance.

Don't expect women to equal man and they will mold accordingly.
 

DEEZEDBRAH

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That's scaring a hard to digest, but it's true... I'm 100% sure that this is all my fault, cause I'm responsible for allowing those things to happen.

And I'm understanding some past experiences that made me feel guilty and slave from those ****s. And no one can solve it for me other than myself.

I feel like a volcano about to explode, many illusions that I believed and today I see that it was all a lie, and even though it's hard, I open my eyes ... and at the same time it's like I'm tearing my own flesh.
Read, Read queen by matt riddle (i think). He goes off on what a joke feminism is. It shows what investment is put into secure relationship and children. Men bring resources and status. Women bring youth and fertility. The problem now is women bring nothing but a contaminated womb, decay SMV, and eggs that yield either retarded children or autistic kids.

It doesn't matter if she gets fat, cucks or is a nasty *****. Your resources will be allocated and the courts will run your children as they see fit.

Love is a fantasy. There was once a mutually beneficial arrangement to some degree now. Women today want her cake and want to eat it too. Crater SMV and play house when playboy stops calling. Trad cucks pedal resources. The first thing that you did was set pace and precedence.

I'd get out while you still can.
 

DEEZEDBRAH

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It's how I'm doing too.

But with this weight on the back comes the emotional weight, cause (based on my life experiences) I never in my life dated a woman that recognized this financial effort to afford the relationship.

They start blaming of not giving them the attention they want so much because we're focused on building our career and projects.

I'm in a point that I even don't give a f*ck for those behaviors... Im ignoring those messages or blames and keep doing what's my priority.
Selfish as ****kkk. You are in a Lose lose situation. If you stick to your guns, focus on career, she's gonna cheat, cuck or divorce rape you. If you hit the breaks on the LTR and resources that you shell out, you can set parameters but its difficult. You set the pace. You are provider male. Beta bucks.
Good luck getting out.
 
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