convo with girl threw me off guard!

[cNfny]

this girl i've had a thing for but has insisted we stay friends said today that her dad thinks i like her, after laughing and askin why? (to hide my true feelings, as to play her dumb friendship game)

she replies that he just thinks thats why we hang out sometimes, i reponded with a few laughs and said "he's cute, tell him dont worry we're not even friends because once one of us starts dating someone our hang outs will diminish"

she then! started questioning this "why do you say that? why have you said it before?"

i didn't expect to give an explanaton for my manipulation intent to make her wonder why i wasnt interested more than a friend (again to suit her "justfriends" quo of us)

this is how the convo went: (M = me H = her)

M: i dont make a note to always say it
H: but you have said it more than twice
M: keeps the reality of us hangin out open i guess
H: what does that mean?

M: so when it does happen, its not like a big blow like **** howd i lose a friend?
H: ookay.
M: haha youre just makin me say this stuff now, i never even gave much thought to it
H: okay, YOU are the only one who has ever said anything like that but whatever
M: no i mean in depth

M: why do you ask?
H: because i dont know what your reason for saying it is
M: when i say it i mean, when either one of us starts dating someone that's a good conclusive possibilty
H: i know but again, its not something people normally say out loud more than once?
H: like you make it sound like it something specific you do when you get into a relationship. like let me look through my friends and decide which ones i can keep and which ones i cant
M: so there are rules now? haha
H: omg you are seriously so difficult
M: its just an obvious thing that'd happen
H: EXACTLY
H: so why talk about it so many times
M: why let it bother you so much?
H: omg
M: haha thats like when people say its nice out today, statin somethin thats been said plenty before heh
M: who cares!
H: no thats not really it
M: theres no like methodical plan behind why i say it so often
M: prob when somethin is brought up and the reality of it hits me, then i make the statement ha
M: its puttin things in perspective
H: whatever
M: maybe to not take it for granted or something on a subsconscious level
M: in other words, go ahead, try to find a replacement it's funny to me ;-)
M: but seriously, i need to vacuum now haha so i'll brb
H: a replacement of what?

she asked the last thing when i had left the computer, if this convo picks up again how should i handle it? was what happened there a good start on my part? sorry its so long guys, but thanks in advance.

 

[EFFORT]

meet up with her, isolate and kiss. If it doesn't work move on.

 

[cNfny]

meet up with her, isolate and kiss. If it doesn't work move on.

but from what youve read, how should i handle this if she brings it up again? and did i respond properly to her?

 

[saber]

rule #1 YOU CAN NOT WIN A DEBATE BY ANSWERING SOMONE ELSES QUESTIONS!!!!


P.S. "My dad said" is code for "I think" replace those words and rethink the whole convo.

And in case you don't figure it out:
Her point of view is that she is your best option and you still aren't making a move on her. Th friendship game is a sure way to lose...

 

[cNfny]

P.S. "My dad said" is code for "I think" replace those words and rethink the whole convo.

And in case you don't figure it out:
Her point of view is that she is your best option and you still aren't making a move on her. Th friendship game is a sure way to lose...

this makes sense to me but! why would her point of view be that im her best option if she's many times before stated she only likes me as a friend?

 

[PectoralisMajor]

Good work on trying to play it cool, but you maybe could have handled that conversation better.

Your words in a way threatened to loose the friendship if one of you meets someone else. Thats fair enough to think that, but her translation to what you said will be:

1) He doesnt really care about me, let alone our friendship. He would be an uncaring boyfriend and he has no value for me. I'd be best spending time around those who do have time and wont drop me....

2) You have had a disagreement, and she may not be too keen to speak to you.

There are better ways to increase her interest without upsetting her !

 

[cNfny]

I understand but this has happened before when she got a bf for 3 years. So she of anyone should know what I meant.

 

[Microphone Fiend]

stop worrying about if the convo comes up and make a damn move. Not making a move and jerking off about her every night wont get you any.

 

[Being_the_Don]

I understand but this has happened before when she got a bf for 3 years. So she of anyone should know what I meant.

So you've known her for a while then? If that's the case both of you know each other and know which buttons to push. Like another poster said substitute her "my dad" for "I" and there you'll have it. She's probably testing you. How much time do the two of you spend together and what do you do? It's quite possible that you're a couple without the physical contact if that makes any sense to you. Not a brother (even if she might say is), not a friend but not quite the boyfriend either. If she has ever acted possessive of you or touched you in any personal areas (and on more than one occassion) then you're definitely more than friends.

My advice is to go with your gut. You know this woman better than anyone here does. Give her a little time then ask her what she would do if you were to suddenly move away. Or ask her what she feels when you're not around or when YOU happen to talk to other women? See how she reacts.

 

[backbreaker]

my gosh guys... I don't even know what this is about but whatever it is you are grasping for a string of yarn in the middle of a tidal wave.

IF SHE LIKE DYOU, SHE WOULD BE FVCKING YOU RIGHT NOW.


MOVE ON.

move.......ON

LEAVE her ALONE

people say they don't understand women... well this is a perfect example. it's not that you don't understand, you never took the time out to listen. you were so damn intent on whatever sick plan you had or plot you were trying ot play out, you didn't get the fact that she DOESN'T LIKE YOU. it's as ovbious as day

 

[backbreaker]

So you've known her for a while then? If that's the case both of you know each other and know which buttons to push. Like another poster said substitute her "my dad" for "I" and there you'll have it. She's probably testing you. How much time do the two of you spend together and what do you do? It's quite possible that you're a couple without the physical contact if that makes any sense to you. Not a brother (even if she might say is), not a friend but not quite the boyfriend either. If she has ever acted possessive of you or touched you in any personal areas (and on more than one occassion) then you're definitely more than friends.

My advice is to go with your gut. You know this woman better than anyone here does. Give her a little time then ask her what she would do if you were to suddenly move away. Or ask her what she feels when you're not around or when YOU happen to talk to other women? See how she reacts.

it's called being a surrogate boyfriend. You give her the attention she needs, without her having any implicatoin of returning the favor in intimacy. it's the perfect situtaiton becuase she can go out and get gangbanged and feel totally fine because she has him to fall back on for the emotional support.