Conversation skills?!?!

[Charppy]

Ok ... here comes a hum dinger for ya...lol actually probably more of a dumb question but oh he!! i've asked dumb questions before so here goes....
What is the best way to get good conversation skills??
Where is the best place to learn good conversation skills??
and...
How do I get over the feeling like I really have nothing I care to talk about with anyone?? I know kind of strange question but i'm hoping one of you smart persons might know what i mean by this..gulp:crazy:

 

[Spookey]

Q: best way to learn conversation skills?
a: Go and talk to people. start by approaching a person. if you succeed in that, move on to "Opening your mouth 101" and then "using your vocal chords 212"

Q: Where is the best place to learn good conversation skills
A: In the field. In a club. At a party. At a shopping center. In a library. at the traffic lights. in a group setting.

Q:How do I get over the feeling like I really have nothing I care to talk about with anyone?
A: you lack confidence. you doubt your ability to hold up a conversation. yes you are probably scared but you need to get your ass out there and practice, the scaredness will wear off in time.
read a newspaper regularly. never leave home without a couple of interesting stories to drop into a conversation. practice observing. observe everything. the girl the environment you are in. comment to her on what you observe( her hair, teeth, how crap the service is at the restaurant, how the sky is falling, how much you wish britnet spears would give up and just do porn etc random ****e like that
when you see someone think, "i am an awesome guy, im funny, im smart, i have a diverse range of interests, i know i i will interest her, i wonder if shes good enough for me, hmm lets go see."

 

[Charppy]

hey thanks spooky I appreciate that...Once again I jumped the gun here by asking a question without looking at the DJ Bible before hand...i'm reading it now...what you said though was very helpful..thanks

 

[fonderboy]

Q:How do I get over the feeling like I really have nothing I care to talk about with anyone?

I use to feel that way too, but now I feel like there's an infinite number of things you can talk about.

I think the single most important thing you must have to be a good conversationalist is, you have to be a good listener. You shouldn't be talking like 90% of the time. You must have a GENUINE INTEREST in that person.

In addition, your body language must reflect that interest. Turn towards them, give them eye contact, nod, smile.

With regards to actual topics to talk about, just ask things about them. Don't ask boring factual questions, ask interesting open-ended questions. Talk about things that will elicit emotions and feelings. Find something you two can agree about and get excited about.

Hope that helps.

 

[WestCoast1492]

I've heard a lot about this open ended stuff. I find myself asking far too many boring questions in cold approaches. Can anyone list the best types of questions that will illicit emotions?

 

[Charppy]

thanks fonderboy...i appreciate that...yes it helped...and to the other fella there westcoast...not sure if you read the dj bible thing..but it does have some interesting things in there as well....
Thanks again fonderboy

 

[blinkwatt]

PRACTICE,PRACTICE AND MORE PRACTICE. I remember when I first joined this site that I wasn't the talkative one who knew how to arroach women. After studying alot of the tips on this site about conversation I took a break from here and actually practiced in real life(eye contact,listen to what they say,no questions that could result in yes or no,back straight,look sharp dressed). Now I can talk to ANYONE,famous,super hot it doesn't matter anymore since I can hold an intelligent and stimulating conversation. Im not gonna lie,when I first started dating back when I found this site I was raw meet(potential),now Iam the tri-tip everyone wants. Just practice and you will do fine,do not forget that everytime you "fall short" or "fail" it is a lesson learned and not a "shot down".

 

[Charppy]

Thanks Blinkwatt...I'm glad you said that as well...I love encouragement from anyone..and i take it wherever I can get it Thanks again

 

[Bible_Belt]

Can anyone list the best types of questions that will illicit emotions?

Better yet, don't start conversations with questions, start them with statements. Most people are followers who have been conditioned their entire lives to do what they are told. The next time you see a funny or entertaining item in a store, turn to the nearest person, and be like,"Check this out. Can you believe this thing?" and laugh and don't even care about the response of the other person. If you ask a question, make it a rhetorical one where it does not matter if they answer or not. Maybe they just walk off, or maybe they laugh and begin talking with you - either way that's their choice and you could care less. When you make open-ended statements like this that invite conversation, it is a more positive experience than picking out a target and trying to engage this one person in a conversation. Maybe that one person is having a bad day and doesn't want to talk. With the statement method, they can decline to engage you in coversation without explicitly rejecting you. But even more importantly, it is a better frame. You are a fun, outgoing person who easily engages strangers, but if they don't want to share in the fun, oh well, that's their problem.

 

[Charppy]

hey Biblebelt..that's a great idea...thanks a lot I'm really amazed at how simple it really is and yet so many of us make everything so difficult..i guess it really boils down to deprogramming our preconceived notions and all the false beliefs that we put out there..thanks so much

 

[kawasaki06]

This website helps shy people a little with basic conversaton skills. It helped me.
http://www.csbruce.com/~csbruce/shyness/conversation.html
Practice is the key, practice everywhere you go.

 

[everywomanshero]

It's easy. If you're REALLY BAD off and just can't do it any other way, then break it down.
Stupid-Kid: I went out and tagged some hoe last night after da boyz dropped muh ass off at tha skate park.
You: I can talk about tagging hoes, what I did last night, being dropped off, or the skate park.

If nothing else you can try something like that. Have some default canned conversation stuff to fall back on. You can also talk about situationally relevant things as long as you don't appear to be reaching too hard for something to talk about. You need to become an interesting person in the long run rather than relying on these type of techniques. It is quite obvious when someone has no conversational skills and is trying too hard. Have a soul!

 

[BGMan]

I find that the best way is to simply go up and say hi, ask their name, then ask them things about themselves, why they're there, and throw in funny-ass comments to get them giggling.

BGMan

 

[Charppy]

Thanks Kawasaki..I added that page to my favorites and I read it to...very helpful.
Everywomanshero..You crack me up everytime I read your comments..I liked what you said though..about breaking down the conversation..makes it so much easier that way
BGMan thank you as well

 

[NoNickname]

Q: best way to learn conversation skills?
a: Go and talk to people. start by approaching a person. if you succeed in that, move on to "Opening your mouth 101" and then "using your vocal chords 212"

Q: Where is the best place to learn good conversation skills
A: In the field. In a club. At a party. At a shopping center. In a library. at the traffic lights. in a group setting.

Q:How do I get over the feeling like I really have nothing I care to talk about with anyone?
A: you lack confidence. you doubt your ability to hold up a conversation. yes you are probably scared but you need to get your ass out there and practice, the scaredness will wear off in time.
read a newspaper regularly. never leave home without a couple of interesting stories to drop into a conversation. practice observing. observe everything. the girl the environment you are in. comment to her on what you observe( her hair, teeth, how crap the service is at the restaurant, how the sky is falling, how much you wish britnet spears would give up and just do porn etc random ****e like that.

And how bald men always stroke their hand over the head. They're kinoing their own heads.