Control frame? Or flirt?

[fedagent]

This woman and I have been chatting for awhile, she's cool and everything but I think she assumes she can have me easily, and thus isn't interested. We flirt sometimes but I suspect it's just to get attention.....as when I offer her to join me in something she avoids answering.....

So now I switch my strategy a bit to see what happens and this time when she turns a conversation into flirting.....instead of flirting back I seize the frame and continue the conversation in another direction.......

She soon attempts to flirt again and I do it again......

Then she (I think) gets frustrated at me for not flirting and throws a neg my way.....once again I steal the frame without acknowledging the neg...



Now I know everyone will say "Next" etc,...but at this point, I'm using her for game material and testing things......

My question is, what are the thoughts on flirting versus frame control for generating attraction?

Fed

 

[The_Unit]

It seems like:

1) you think too much about the convo
2) ur just doing it on purpose, for ...

i would just go with the flow. after all, talking doesnt (and shouldn't) take much effort. If she casually flirts with you, casually flirt back. It doesnt have to lead to you asking her number or anything. plus that shows you're not diving straight into doing her unlike 90% of the guys out there.

finally, as with anything, if u overdo changing the topic, she'll catch on and think your a complete jerk.

 

[frisco]

yup shes giving you false IOI to **** with you. So yes you should control your own frame an ignore these false IOI but eventually she will give you a true IOI after a couple of true IOI then your set

I cant remember all true IOI but there easy to spot such as

Saying her opinion on something then contradicting herself after because you disagreed

Anyone else care to share some true IOI

 

[fedagent]

Unit,

I'm not trying to number close or anything......it's a girl I already know who is an attention wh*** and since she's keen on toying with me, then I have no qualms about making her emotions my little toy.

Good call on the overdoing the topic change or frame control.....I'll keep that one in mind as I can see myself overdoing that.

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frisco,

I was thinking the same thing.....altho I'm not convinced I'll get a true IOI but I'll need to keep my eye out for them....the hardest thing will be telling the difference from a fake one and a real one.....other than some just can't be faked unless they really know what they are doing (your example of an opinion is a great one of an IOI that really can't be faked)......

A list of real versus potential fake IOI's would be great to have!!!!

 

[Mjazz]

Flirting doesnt necessarily mean that she can have you, just throw some negs her way and just make fun of her.

 

[Zerotwoonenine]

get a number close or something.
U r not telling us enough info, who is she, how long u been hanging out, where do u hang out etc.