Continuity of self

[Riegs]

I got to thinking about this today since I've experienced it first-hand and seen it demonstrated by other people.

Where do we derive our sense of self? Is our ego malleable, and our sense of connection to ourself something we can lose and be totally unaware of?

I've had periods in my life where I've been isolated and working with minimal social contact. Coming out of these few times in my life and transitioning somewhere else, it's been as if my former identity passes away and it feels as if I'm starting over. I start questioning if I'm where I belong, who I am, etc.

I had a close friend for a while who was heavily into a certain music scene. Every aspect of that scene permeated his personality. He sensed things were drying up in his life when his band split up, so he signed up for the military and got married. Two years later when we met at a social gathering, the person I used to know was gone. He'd become very serious, his clothing style was different and his outgoing personality had disappeared. He had completely thrown off his former self and I was taken back by it.

Are we all just blank slates? Meaning that who we are in any given moment only extends as far as what music we listen to, our job, how we dress, our hobbies, home environment and those we associate ourselves with?

I'm beginning to wonder what mental health costs there are for those that have to continually reinvent themselves in life. Struggling with an anxiety disorder myself, I've always wanted to fit in with a particular crowd of people to have my social needs met.. but have always been too much of an individual to be able to relate fully to any particular peer group. I have so many interests and aspects to my personality that I tend to vacillate between them depending on the situation, feeling like a chameleon and never being truly grounded in the process.

Both of my brothers seemed to know who they were early on in life. They continually built on their interests and turned their interests into their careers. For the most part, their personalities seem to be defined by their line of work.

What are everyone's thoughts on this?

 

[MoveYourAss...]

I'm beginning to wonder what mental health costs there are for those that have to continually reinvent themselves in life.

HAVE TO continually reinvent themselves in life: tremendous costs

DO continually reinvent themselves in life: fights and growth

NEVER reinvent themselves: either tremendously lucky or they pay with their life

 

[Interceptor]

We have an Ego derived persona, and our Higher Self.
Our Ego derived persona is what gets us into trouble.
Don't place your sense of self and identity purely on external things.
If you truly KNOW yourself, it doesnt matter where you are or who you are with, you are always YOU.
When you NEED to 'fit in', you are sacrificing your Unique self to be some sort of social persona for others.

Continuity of self is truly the connection to our Spiritual Essence, not external trendy circumstances.
Those who are dependent on others to give them an Identity are doomed to be always unfulfilled, and drifting around to others' personal tastes and whims.
Those who are connected to their Spiritual Self are fulfilled and feel boundless resources pretty much no matter where they are, and who they're with. They know who they are. They dont NEED to 'fit in'.
They feel comfortable being unique.
And they have plenty of resources to deal with anyone who disapproves of their uniqueness.


Whenever you feel vague about who you are, or dont feel grounded, it has to do with two things:

Poor control of your Personal Boundary

and lack of deep insight and alignment to YOUR own Values.