Contacts me to return some gifts?

[hansol]

Hi guys,

Broke it off with a chick a week and a bit ago. It wasn't a huge ugly thing, just kinda one of those things that couldn't work out, and both of us getting frustrated. Anyway, as we all know Christmas just happened, and I indulged her a bit and got her some jewellery etc. Then everything went down, and things ended. I was good though, walked away with no hard feelings, maintained no-contact, etc. Still am crazy about this chick but I'm trying to stick to my guns and move on.

However, last night on facebook she contacted me, messaging "Hey, I would like to get this ring back to you." and "Please give me your address." I ignored it for an hour, then messaged back "Hey, just on my way out. Text me later." Never did hear anything, but this 6a.m. (after a good party night hehe) I texted her saying "Hey, don't worry about it. I bought it for you, and looks great on you." and left it at that.

A few hours later, she followed up with "I don't want it. Honestly I won't wear it. Please tell me your address and I will send it to you." I've just ignored that one and haven't said anything since.

So can the experts tell me wtf is going on here? Is she just trying to get a reaction? Trying to make her ego feel good? Or is she genuinely trying to be "nice"? As for the ring, I could care less, I have no desire at all to get it back. Also, from a practical standpoint, I wouldn't want an expensive ring going through standard post to begin with. I mean the chick knows where I live, she could always just drop it off...

Anyway, I don't want to over-analyze this ****. Anyone know what the deal is here? Does she have an angle or what? Just keep ignoring or try to meet up or what?

(Background is that we were dating for 5 months, did the "I love you" thing, spent a ton of time together etc. I was almost thinking tying this one down for the long term, but circumstances didn't really permit it. I wanted it more than she did, so that was kinda the end of the end. I did really like this chick though, and ending it has been really unpleasant. Hence the no-contact and trying to move on, but I would be lying if I didn't say I wanted to get back together with this chick.)

 

[Cremasta]

She's cutting ties, and at least she's decent enough to give it back to you instead of just chucking it out.

Go get your stuff and be done with it. Take it to the pawn shop and make a few dollars if you really don't want it around.

If you do go and get it, make sure that you do NOT step inside her door. Grab the ring, smile, say thanks and leave. Going inside with her will just be painful - unless you know she's single, horny and you would have no problems getting her kit off.

 

[MikeOck]

You are reading too much into it. Sounds like she feels guilty that you bought her something potentially expensive before she dropped you and wants to clear her conscience.

For future reference, a ring is not a good gift idea unless you are proposing marriage or you are already married. The symbolism of rings toward marriage is part of our culture and after only 5 months you probably scared her with that one.

 

[Zarky]

This is one time where it seems she's being 100% honest. She won't wear it because it reminds her of you and wants to give it back. Take it and sell it. And stop giving broads jewelry for chrissakes.

The only chick I ever gave jewelry to was after about 3 years of dating and it was a cheap trinket I bought when I went overseas. It was like a €15 silver necklace and she wore it ALL the time.

 

[hansol]

Hey guys,

Okay thanks. I screwed it up by talking to her. Should have just ignored and kept on moving on. Oh well, now I know.

Yeah, the ring thing... The intention was that it was a tongue-in-cheek acknowledgement of the fact that even though we talked about how wicked we would be long-term and all that, it couldn't happen as she was leaving the country in 5 months to go to grad school. So it was done as more of a "One day you'll look in your jewellery box and see that thing and remember about that crazy Hansol in another life."

Regardless, I did a lot of things wrong with this one in general, first one being getting attached to something that is going to be gone in 5 months.