"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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Consistently needing to next each girl

drift king

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I seem to be having a barren spell in terms of meeting women. I'm constantly getting numbers (this bit I find easy) and would like to think I generated enough interest for them wanting to meet up.

But when the time comes to actually arranging the meeting they either don't reply or the interest level drops. How do I actually get these HBs to actually meet up?

Cos it's all very well and good saying 'next' every time.. but that is all I seem to be doing, girl after girl it's the same thing. Admittedly I am not great on the phone and get very nervous so these days I usually text to arrange a meeting cos I get frustrated if either

A) they don't answer

or

B)we speak but because talking on the phone is not my forté they end up giving me some flakey answer about how they don't know what they're doing on so and so day then it ends up being some negotiation of when to meet.
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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Mavrick

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drift king said:
and get very nervous
Herein lies your problem. People say to be yourself for a reason. They don't really tell you what they mean by that. You have to be your natural self. You have to just be in the moment while in conversation with a woman. Whenever you're nervous, it's because your trying to have an outcome. You want to sound good and impress which is totally reactive. Don't be the one who is reactive.

Look at the whole situation from a different angle. You need to find a quality woman. A woman who qualifies herself to you. You're the man, and she's the woman. You don't have to prove yourself to her or anyone else.

That crap you're spewing is all in your mind.
 

drift king

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To be honest I'm at the end of my tether with these girls. I'm so fed up that today I've just next'd 5 girls because they showed a little bit of signs of flaking.

I seem to need to let them know I'm walking away cos otherwise I'll feel like they won't feel next'd and just felt he got the message and left rather than me choosing to jump ship before I get pushed.

Is this reasonable?

I get fed up of all this not giving you a definite time and saying 'I'll let you know' and 'I'm not sure if I'm free'

All these answers seem to equate to me low interest level and they tell me to be more easy going and casual about it and not so pressurizing.. but is it a reasonable request for me to have a definite time we're suppose to be meeting that week rather than a 'I'll let you know' flake answer??

I just always come across as too pressurized and I guess needy by trying to get a specific time but if I'm more casual about it I don't get an answer or a meet up and feel like they'll walk all over me and they do.
 

sherineo

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asking for their phone numbers is gay...i don't know who has spread this code around that getting a phone number equals to success...

-sherineo
 

Gibraltar

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All you need is more phone experience.

The fastest and quickest way to build it is through BUSINESS, whether it be a corporate hotline, organization, or fund raising committee.

Spend some time searching out to companies or organizations you like, and pick up the phone.

You'll be amazed by how conducting business or requesting information for things is MUCH more difficult than follow-up with a female.

Why? Because you are starting from ground zero in business.

At least you talked to the girl you're contacting before.

Lastly, I would say not to care as much. Why would you want to date a flaky chick anyway?

Save the conversation for the date, and be brief over the phone.
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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Francisco d'Anconia

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drift king said:
I seem to be having a barren spell in terms of meeting women. I'm constantly getting numbers (this bit I find easy) and would like to think I generated enough interest for them wanting to meet up....
So why the hell are you waiting until things cool down to set up a get together? If all you are trying to achieve while they are interested is getting a phone number, consider yourself a success.
 
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