Congruency and your core beliefs.

[The Bad Ass Canadian]

There's an old saying that says "knowledge is power." While this is true, no one on this website should mistake knowledge for wisdom.

You can read a thousand posts and be very knowledgeable in the ways of picking up women, but this knowledge doesn't become a part of your core belief system, and in the end will leave you "high and dry". It's kinda like studying for an exam at school, in order to pass.... you can cram it all in there but once the test is over, you quickly discard most of what you learned, and moce on.

I feel this is where many guys go wrong, with women. They can get to a certain point with a girl but once they're in new territory (something that they haven't read about), they're unsure of what to do to keep her interested, so they end up making mistakes and eventually losing the girl.

Real men don't have this problem

A real man, meaning a guy who has fully matured and grown up in every sense, will never have this problem. Why, you might ask?

Because he has grown so in touch and attuned to his core beliefs that nothing can shake him form his path. He is completely congruent in every aspect of his life. His beliefs reflect his actions which reflect the outcome of his aspirations and interactions. Anything that is thrown at him, be it work related or women related is dealt with from deep down, and he never second guesses his decisions.

When you know who you are on the deepest of levels, you will walk through the world without any insecurities, whatsoever. To be so rock solid, and in touch with who you are, you will never doubt anything.

So the basic point of this post is to make sure you know who you are on the deepest of levels. Examine your beliefs, your values and your morals. Once you know who you are (this can take years, and sadly, many men never figure it out. These are the ones who grow old but never become men.) You'll never have to question wether what you're doing is right or wrong. Your decisions and your actions will be automatic and completley congruent with your unshaken sense of self.

After you reach this point, you should never have to return to this board with a question regarding some chick or some other stupid, petty little problem. You will already know the answer and take care of buisness, on your own terms.

 

[KarmaSutra]

There's an old saying that says "knowledge is power." While this is true, no one on this website should mistake knowledge for wisdom.

You can read a thousand posts and be very knowledgeable in the ways of picking up women, but this knowledge doesn't become a part of your core belief system, and in the end will leave you "high and dry". It's kinda like studying for an exam at school, in order to pass.... you can cram it all in there but once the test is over, you quickly discard most of what you learned, and moce on.

I feel this is where many guys go wrong, with women. They can get to a certain point with a girl but once they're in new territory (something that they haven't read about), they're unsure of what to do to keep her interested, so they end up making mistakes and eventually losing the girl.

Real men don't have this problem

A real man, meaning a guy who has fully matured and grown up in every sense, will never have this problem. Why, you might ask?

Because he has grown so in touch and attuned to his core beliefs that nothing can shake him form his path. He is completely congruent in every aspect of his life. His beliefs reflect his actions which reflect the outcome of his aspirations and interactions. Anything that is thrown at him, be it work related or women related is dealt with from deep down, and he never second guesses his decisions.

When you know who you are on the deepest of levels, you will walk through the world without any insecurities, whatsoever. To be so rock solid, and in touch with who you are, you will never doubt anything.

So the basic point of this post is to make sure you know who you are on the deepest of levels. Examine your beliefs, your values and your morals. Once you know who you are (this can take years, and sadly, many men never figure it out. These are the ones who grow old but never become men.) You'll never have to question wether what you're doing is right or wrong. Your decisions and your actions will be automatic and completley congruent with your unshaken sense of self.

After you reach this point, you should never have to return to this board with a question regarding some chick or some other stupid, petty little problem. You will already know the answer and take care of buisness, on your own terms.

Alas though, Most guys are too frightened to fvck up with women and relationships out of fear they'll never get into another one. This is the beauty of maturity and experience. Once I learned that fvcking up is ok, with the stipulation being, I LEARN FROM THOSE MISTAKES it's no longer a burden or fear but an opportunity to make an informed future decision.

 

[The Bad Ass Canadian]

Alas though, Most guys are too frightened to fvck up with women and relationships out of fear they'll never get into another one. This is the beauty of maturity and experience. Once I learned that fvcking up is ok, with the stipulation being, I LEARN FROM THOSE MISTAKES it's no longer a burden or fear but an opportunity to make an informed future decision.

And these are the ones who haven't grown up, fully. They are still dependent on an outsider's approval to gauge their own self worth... in this case, the fear of fvcking up and losing a woman's approval and also the fear of being alone for the rest of their lives is what keeps them from realizing the truth.

They shouldn't be afraid of being alone, cuz that is nothing more than a point of view. If you have a sense of self and of purpose, then you're never alone. You are happy in your own skin and aren't bothered by the lack of a "significant other".

 

[Jariel]

Spot on! I've gone through those stages and you're right, there comes a point where you do what feels naturally, even if some guys here would call "AFC", because it's congruent with my personality.

Top post as always!

 

[I-am-someone]

I absolutely agree.

One needs to aquire experience in all aspects of women.
One needs to listen to your own heart, and hear what it's telling you.
One needs to accept your emotions, and learn to deal with them.
One needs to recognize your sexuality, you need to know it in and out.

In physiological order, head, heart, stomach, crotch. This is actually something I would advise you to think about.
For me, my best successes have been when I had these four parts of my body in tune. Every part is just as important in every aspect of your life.

• Your head is your rational aid, assisting you in logic and general control of your body.
• Your heart is the part that some people call your soul, it's a part of you that you can rely on and you'll never be wrong.
• Your stomach is your emotions. Every emotion we feel, we actually feel in our stomach. Just think about it, people tend to get grumpy when they're hungry, but people are usually a lot more relaxed and happy when they've just eaten. Your stomach is where your emotions come from.
• Your crotch... well, that's pretty clear. Your sexuality is only one of the four parts, it should not become the most important one because it will weaken your other four, but it should also never be forgotten because it can make all other three feel stronger.

These four parts need to be in a proper balance! Simple, but true.

 

[The Bad Ass Canadian]

I absolutely agree.

One needs to aquire experience in all aspects of women.
One needs to listen to your own heart, and hear what it's telling you.
One needs to accept your emotions, and learn to deal with them.
One needs to recognize your sexuality, you need to know it in and out.

In physiological order, head, heart, stomach, crotch. This is actually something I would advise you to think about.
For me, my best successes have been when I had these four parts of my body in tune. Every part is just as important in every aspect of your life.

• Your head is your rational aid, assisting you in logic and general control of your body.
• Your heart is the part that some people call your soul, it's a part of you that you can rely on and you'll never be wrong.
• Your stomach is your emotions. Every emotion we feel, we actually feel in our stomach. Just think about it, people tend to get grumpy when they're hungry, but people are usually a lot more relaxed and happy when they've just eaten. Your stomach is where your emotions come from.
• Your crotch... well, that's pretty clear. Your sexuality is only one of the four parts, it should not become the most important one because it will weaken your other four, but it should also never be forgotten because it can make all other three feel stronger.

These four parts need to be in a proper balance! Simple, but true.

That is a fvcking great way of putting it.

 

[DarkLight]

This thread, and the energetic codes within letter... speech... intelligence; is probably one of the most powerful threads I've read thus far on the forum.

Potential decoded through the accuracy of the beyond... true source.

I'd like to add...

To the ability that one lets go into the essence of selfexperience, one evolves. Know this through understanding. For that is the feeling of expansion. Words read, are words become. Enjoy this mirror, your welcome.

 

[FM 3321]

This thread is so deep I have trouble grasping it at the moment. I need to come back and read it again later.

Honestly I felt a little lost after reading this, but I know that's a good thing if that makes sense.

 

[Sam Gold]

Two Year Lurker
1st time poster

I have to say, this post/thread inspired me to register, and I like to give props to The-Bad-Ass-Canadian. I can relate to the post, but I could never transcribe nor express the mentality into words. You are dead right on about the distinction between knowledge and wisdom.

I still make tons of blunders in the social world, but I truly learn from my "mistakes", and I have noticed improvements within my self on the deepest levels. I become less insecure about myself, and intangible things such as your conviction and beliefs truly define and shape your character. I admit; sometimes my initial reactions are not the wisest of all...but I'm getting better.

 

[FM 3321]

Two Year Lurker
1st time poster

I have to say, this post/thread inspired me to register, and I like to give props to The-Bad-Ass-Canadian. I can relate to the post, but I could never transcribe nor express the mentality into words. You are dead right on about the distinction between knowledge and wisdom.

I still make tons of blunders in the social world, but I truly learn from my "mistakes", and I have noticed improvements within my self on the deepest levels. I become less insecure about myself, and intangible things such as your conviction and beliefs truly define and shape your character. I admit; sometimes my initial reactions are not the wisest of all...but I'm getting better.

I know exactly what you mean on the social blunders but it's interesting knowing that whenever you step out the door you're learning something new.

 

[I-am-someone]

Mistakes are never mistakes...
They are points for improvement.

 

[The Bad Ass Canadian]

Two Year Lurker
1st time poster

I have to say, this post/thread inspired me to register, and I like to give props to The-Bad-Ass-Canadian. I can relate to the post, but I could never transcribe nor express the mentality into words. You are dead right on about the distinction between knowledge and wisdom.

I still make tons of blunders in the social world, but I truly learn from my "mistakes", and I have noticed improvements within my self on the deepest levels. I become less insecure about myself, and intangible things such as your conviction and beliefs truly define and shape your character. I admit; sometimes my initial reactions are not the wisest of all...but I'm getting better.

If you work hard on growing up, and becoming a man you'll slowly start to pull it all togetehr, in a natural way. This kind of stuff doesn't happen over night, and you will fvck up every now and again. That's life. Learn from situations so that you can better recognoize and handle it, when it comes around again.

A boy's reaction to certain situations is much different then that of a man's...

The boy will quickly lose his composure when he encounters "rocky terrain". He is unsure of how to handle the situation and instead of going with his gut, he will tend to do what he think's he is "supposed" to do. That never works.

A man, on the otherhand, will know exactly how to handle the situation and takes it all in stride. Even if it is a scenario that he's never encountered, he'll always trust his own judgement. He doesn't seek advice from anyone.

I know this reply might sound vague, because it is. This mentality applies to all aspects of your life. There are no specifics.