"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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confused girl

frusciante1234

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ok so theres this girl that I like, ive known her for a little over a year and things have been slowly building. It is quite obvious she likes me but she refuses to admit it. Almost as if she is in denial. I know she likes me because she hangs on my every word, is all smiles, her eyes are mesmerized, constantly shows herself off and plays with her hair, lets me touch her, touches me, calls me if I havent called her in a few days, we have great conversations and there is just a definate sexual vibe between us. The thing is she likes to play games, worse than any other girl Ive ever dealt with. She is a virgin and has not been with many men. She has also been hurt in the past. I think she is scared to get involved with me because I am sometimes overtly sexual with her and she knows that I hook up with alot of girls. So what she does is date very "safe" guys, they are losers who she can dominate. She also loves to constantly tell me about these guys, clearly trying to make me jealous. She tells me that she has decided she wants to lose her virginity to her current boyfriend, but he won;t do it. Thats how safe these guys are. Anyway, I always tell her that she should dump her boyfriend and just date me. She tells me that she has no interest in me. I told her that I think she likes me and wont admit it the other day, and she got VERY pissed. She told me to stop talking to her. I did. The very next morning she called me up and continued to argue with me for an hour about how we are too different to be together. I ended up having to hang up on her after an hour. If she doesnt like me, why does she care so much? Also I forgot to mention, when she hangs with me and my friends she tries to flirt hardcore with them, and I have even heard her admit she does it to make me jealous. It seems obvious that she does like me, and that she is afraid to act on her feelings because of her friends opinions, and because she thinks that I may hurt her like guys in her past. Can anyone tell me how I can make this confused girl realize what she wants?
 

"You Can't Argue a Woman Into Liking You"

You made your case like a lawyer. Stable job. Good guy. Ready for something real. All true. All irrelevant.

She weighed your points, nodded along, felt nothing — then fell hard for some tattooed bartender with a motorcycle and a gambling problem.

Logic is where attraction goes to die. The "22 Rules" work a level deeper, on the subconscious switches that decide within minutes whether you register as a MAN or as part of the furniture.

Stop presenting evidence. Start flipping switches.

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Avn_0903

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Try to make her jealous, try to make it seem like if she doesn't leave her BF 4 u, u will be w/ another girl instead.
 

Faded Image

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. Anyway, I always tell her that she should dump her boyfriend and just date me. She tells me that she has no interest in me. I told her that I think she likes me and wont admit it the other day, and she got VERY pissed.
So if a girl tells you that you should dump your girlfriend and be with her because she thinks you like her but won't admit it, would you do it or get pissed?

She very well may have liked you, there's also a very good chance she likes her boyfriend a bit more than you. You should have never told her that you think (key word: think) she likes you or she should leave her bf for you. You've given her the power and now she's going do anything she can to show you that she doesn't like you (even if she still do). If she does this, it's easy fall victim to becoming the chaser trying to win over her intrest again not knowing that you're only pushing her further away.

Pull back for a couple of days and let her come to you.
 

frusciante1234

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ok i have pulled back for a couple days, I'm expecting her to contact me soon, any more advice on wat to do here?
 

BadsnakeUK

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I think it started to go wrong when you argued with her for an hour over why you two should/shouldn't be together. I just don't entertain this sort of conversation these days. Thats for her to talk to ger girlfriends about. Ganji is always an option but if she comes back to you its on your terms and your terms only from now on.

If you think this is too drastic, just act like you're bored with the situation. Don't return the flirting etc and have other priorities. Don't be too available. Jealousy plotlines are also good as other guys have mentioned.

In short, if she wants to keep having fun with you its pay to play from now on!
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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frusciante1234

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hey guys,

ok so I did what you all suggested and completely cut off contact. I noticed a few nights ago that she had started leaving her AIM on all night, which may have been because she wanted me to IM her (she knows Im up late alot.) Anyway, yesterday I was driving by her house on the way to work and she was sitting in her yard with some friends. I honked and she gave me a huge smile and a wave. She probably expected a text or call after that, but I didnt give her one. A few hours later, I was driving and she happened to pull up next to me at a red light with her friends. I was friendly, but I didnt act that happy to see her and I think she was caught off guard by that. I drove away, and that was that. Finally, a few hours later, she actually called me just "to see what I was doing." I told her I wasnt quite sure yet, and she said she was just going to 7/11 with her boyfriend. I said she could accompany me to my friends house, but she didnt want to go. (She knows my friend is an older woman who wants me). Later on at night, I texted her that she should have came cause there was a party there. Now today shes online but I wont contact her until she contacts me. Any thoughts?
 

ARrocket

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frusciante1234 said:
hey guys,

ok so I did what you all suggested and completely cut off contact. I noticed a few nights ago that she had started leaving her AIM on all night, which may have been because she wanted me to IM her (she knows Im up late alot.) Anyway, yesterday I was driving by her house on the way to work and she was sitting in her yard with some friends. I honked and she gave me a huge smile and a wave. She probably expected a text or call after that, but I didnt give her one. A few hours later, I was driving and she happened to pull up next to me at a red light with her friends. I was friendly, but I didnt act that happy to see her and I think she was caught off guard by that. I drove away, and that was that. Finally, a few hours later, she actually called me just "to see what I was doing." I told her I wasnt quite sure yet, and she said she was just going to 7/11 with her boyfriend. I said she could accompany me to my friends house, but she didnt want to go. (She knows my friend is an older woman who wants me). Later on at night, I texted her that she should have came cause there was a party there. Now today shes online but I wont contact her until she contacts me. Any thoughts?
You live in a pretty small town...

You're doing fine, just keep up the "bored" thing.
 

frusciante1234

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I havent heard from her since the night she called me, which was saturday. I have continued to ignore her by not calling texting or IMming her. I have a friend who talks to her friend so me and him did a little spy action. Her friend said that I seem a little forceful. I had my friend tell her that I said I was getting tired of her, and her friend said that she said the same thing about me, yet she still talks to me. She said she doesnt know who to believe anymore. My friend also said that I have been talking alot to another girl that I really like, which isnt true but hopefully will get a reaction. Her friend was like "ohh thats chill, good for him" and my friend then said I need to settle down at some point lol. This was last night and so far I havent heard anything. Any comments, suggestions, concerns?
 
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