Confused and lost

[Muppet]

About 2 months ago I finaly started to go out with a really good friend of mine. We used to hang out maybe once a week or so, and have known her for about 2 years, but only been hanging out for 1 year mostly. Well I finaly kiss her and she is real happy and saying she has been waiting for this for so long.
Time goes by and we are happy as hell, not one fight, good sex I just can't get enough of her. Untill about a week ago, over the past few weeks she has been sorta blowing me off, not returning many phone calls and going out with friends and getting drunk to escape issues. Well we finaly had a talk and she said everything is perfect 'cept she just doesnt have the deep feelings for me anymore. At first she did have very very strong feelings for me, maybe stronger than any she has before. She was so happy all the time, chatting with friends and always talking about me. We are both confused at what to do. I keep trying to not feel like a pest but I do end up calling her atleast once a day, usaly me who calls her. I just can't stop thinking about her.

She is the kind of person to sometimes avoid problems or use weed/drinks to get away from things. I keep looking for ideas and any glimmer of hop that this is not a perm thing and something can be worked out. Could she be affriad of commentment and sorta turned off her feelings? There is no other guy. I am just so lost here I want to be with her so bad, she is everthing I have ever wanted, cept for the loseing feelings. She said she thinks it might be because we were friends for so long.

Anyone have any ideas? Btw we are both early 20's

Nick

 

[penkitten]

i think she sounds depressed and is taking drugs to medicate her depression.
are u sure there isnt another dude?

 

[Muppet]

Yup, she is one of thouse odd honest girls that would tell me. Also she hardly has any time for just me.

 

[PuertoRican_Lover]

She is not coming back to you so don't hope and quit calling her! Makes you look needy and desperate and women hate this!

I'm going to tell you something that you should keep with you - never have emotions of love for any woman except your wife!!! This rule applies to all men!!!

Any girl that you are sexing is just another hor (yes she is) and hors are temporary and will move on to her next pimp until a desperate lonely fool marries her!! Hors are always excited in the beginning and they'll deceive you and make you believe that it is permanent but this permanency goes against the hor mindset -if she had sex with one man she'll be sexing another soon - it is just a matter of time!!

So never think that she will be loyal to you - this is men's fatal flaw and they become devastated because they (the men) themselves are loyal but the hor never is; thus, the man is usually depressed by their separation and the woman happily separates to find the ubiquitous penis elsewhere!

You are still very young and you'll fall for another girl just don’t emotionally attach yourself to a girl if you are sexing her – because she is only your hor for a season and you were only the next pimp in line!! Sorry to talk to you about your ex this way but she is what she is!!!

Live and learn!

 

[PuertoRican_Lover]

Originally posted by SuperGigaloDJ
Although I agree completely with the first paragraph I disagree with the second. It's OK to have emotions of love for a girl if the LTR has been going on for a long time. Maybe a year or two.

If you want to avoid heartache as many DJ's seem to be going through, this is the only solution! I'm saying never completely give yourself to her unless it is permanent on her part which should go with marriage - otherwise you'll have 15 one-year love fests and 15 failures - face it, women are not loyal today!! Don't expect loyalty unless she is your wife!

 

[segam]

she's turnin' away from you 'n u r in panic tryin' to bring her back by baggin' ........................... just don't loose urself, try to make her jealous, don't run after her make her do that..... the more you do this the more she dislikes u coz she sees a weak boy.......
call her once in a week 'n talk to her like u don't care whatever happened 'n like she's just an another usual girl for you...




Puerto Rikan boy I like what you said....... you really said interestin' things .........but want to correct u in a thing ..... Loving and falling in love are quite different things ....... Love ur wife 'n fall in love girls.

 

[Muppet]

Thanks, I just need to find something to take my mind off her. All my friends are away to college =/

 

[belividere]

PRL,
I'm quite confused with the knowledge you post. Most if not all of your posts are saying that all girls who are not virgins are hors, right? What in gods good name would I even want a virgin for anymore? If I dont get sex within the first 3 weeks than I'm done. Okay so now is when you say that any girl who is willing to give up sex that quick is a hor. Well any girl that isn't giving up sex to a guy that she really wants by this point to me is just a prude. I have options with girls that are so called "hors", since they have slept with a couple of guys in their lifes, why would I wait around for one that is holding out? Also this is quite the paradox really. I have a skill level well beyond that of most men and can get a girl to sleep with me. If I present myself as the best prize that a women will ever have a chance with in her life than how long should I wait to get her in bed? If I can honestly back up these claims than why would she not want to jump in the sack with me?

Muppet,
You are pushing too hard. What was your level of communication when you were just friends? If you are smothering her since you've hooked up than quit it. I think that if I were in your shoes I would step back and make her realize that she has a chance at a good thing and that she is ruining any chance of what could be.

 

[Muppet]

When we were friends I saw here maybe once a week for a night or so, usaly with some friends, once in a while was just us, but the first 2-3 weeks after going out we saw eachother almost everyday.

 

[Wyldfire]

Have you been predictable and somewhat lazy about keeping her interest level up? Once you get a relationship you can't just expect everything to stay like it was in the beginning. You have to put in the effort to keep things frest. Chances are she just isn't "feeling in love" anymore. You CAN get that back if you do things you did in the beginning to make her want you. You can't get lazy in a relationship.

 

[frivolousz21]

this is what I did with a month and half thing.

the 1st 3 or 4 weeks....we would go out and do things alot..then it would be to her apt everynight to talk, sex, then sleep.

I guess it got boring..I dunno..but I learn from my mistakes

 

[PuertoRican_Lover]

DJ Belvidere, do you notice how so many dudes are devastated by hors who leave them?? All I'm saying is why are THESE GUYS in love with a womaN WHO GIVES SEX TO ANY MAN SHE DESIRES THEN DUMPS HIM WHEN SHE WANTS ANOTHER PENIS...i'M JUST SAYING DON'T BE SURPRISED of a hor;s actions - THIS IS VERY PREDICTABLE BEHAVIOR ON THE HOR'S PART!!!

Men need to wake up to the modern day hor mindset and quit acting like she is your wife who shall and is expected to be loyal forever!!!

 

[tmpgstx]

I think Puerto is saying that women are the natural selectors of the species. When the random selection does not merit any standards by girls who have sex on an immediate basis, how can she expect to have a guy worth his salt invest in her?. The guys that do, are the decent ones who should be with decent girls but often end up with a girl like this because of their own insecurites. They're bewildered when she leaves because having looked at her as worthy, when in fact she herself doesn't think so.