Confused about younger women age issues

[Slickster]

But would it be appropriate if Erica ( lets say she's big, fat, 45 year old, buck tooth) made advances on you?...

This is exactly why I said don't treat them any differently. If she's interested she'll make you know it. Just go about your business and watch and gauge her IL.

When you start getting buying signals there is nothing wrong with making a move.

Too many guys are chasing chicks when they should let themselves be chased.

 

[NatureGuy]

But how do you separate "buying signals" from the other similar signs in a case like this?
Maybe this is where I have a problem...
I often can't tell the difference, so I assume the former.

 

[Big Pappy]

Written by slickster -

You should have the attitude that you are the sh!t! Just assume that they are ALL naturally interested in you! Why wouldn't they be?

Excellent point! When a girl tells me that she's not interested in me in "that way", I just look at her like she's crazy. Then I tell her that she will be soon enough. They always are.

 

[Slickster]

Big Pappy said it well.

In a nutshell, when you apply kino, and the girl returns kino (ie: puts her hand on your thigh, you need to kiss her.)
....

Depending on the situation you may not want to be touching thighs

However a kino test is just like a kiss test. It cuts through the crap and helps you gauge interest. Luckily you can do it subtley ie. a brush on the arm, a nudge with your elbow, etc. And not come off as a total creep.

 

[TooColdUlrick]

Originally posted by NatureGuy
Thanks guys. This is helping alot. In the
back of my mind, I guess I've been saying, "am I the dirty old man here?" or is she really interested? Hey, I'd rather stick with over 30's, but there seem to be alot more available 20's women (let face it, most of them).

TooColdUlrick: I can really relate to what you're saying, although I wonder if alot of those women are just interested in you professionally.
My situation is very similar to yours.
In my case, I'm often approached by females (always younger) but I feel they are primarily interested in my specialized knowledge to gain some advantage in our field, not anything romantic (although they do like me). Gee, I hope I'm right there....

yes, this does happen and i look out for it. it's easy to spot since it happens a lot from non-students and those that i come in contact with, with consulting and such--both men and women.

anyway, the ones that are romantically interested are usually not so at first (students). it takes about 6 weeks of listening to me and learning what i'm about (personality will show through by this time and they know me pretty well even if they say otherwise).

most of these young ladies are not gold diggers of any sort. they make their own bank and have their own contacts, etc. i have found that many are intimidated just by the fact that i'm highly educated. i try to quell that as much as possible, though.

there's absolutely zero reason to think the "dirty old man" thing. get it out of your head bro. for me, i won't even bother with anyone over 30 years old. i go for the 23-28 year olds almost exclusively. they have an enthusiasm and zest for life that brings me up, not draggin/naggin me down. i just don't need/want the BS that usually comes with a 30+ chick, especially if she has kids and an ex husband.

another issue is the "we have nothing in common" thing. this is legitimate. however, with me, i have zero interest in talking about my daytime activities. i'm really a pumpkin head at night time, by choice. by talking to me after work, you would never know that i have a Phd or that i do what i do. so again, by default, the gold diggers, go by the wayside pretty quickly.

this is getting long... but i have also found that many of these chicks want to step up their level of sophistication--it's like they crave it because they ain't gettin it from the 25 year old DJ's. i'm the man for this, LOL. i know my wine very well, went to a 16 week culinary school at night to brush up, have a pimpin' 74 Olds (red with white top) for weekend fun, wear a Rolex Submariner, am a semi-pro blackjack player, and my condo is decorated in the Empire style which gets nothing but ooohs and ahhhs...

if they are interested in me because of this, fine wit me. again, these chicks are more interested in the confidence, ambition, intelligence, style, etc, and not the material things, per se. all of these material things are the result of the other more important things. i'm very confident this is why they cometh.

live it up, dude. you ain't getting any younger! TooCold is gonna play this game for another two years. plenty of time to find a perfect match to settle down with.

 

[NatureGuy]

I'll take a look at the Kino advice again.
I think I know the theory, but in practice
I don't see how a brush or nudge is going to tell me much, given the vagaries of human expressions.

 

[NatureGuy]

there's absolutely zero reason to think the "dirty old man" thing. get it out of your head bro. for me, i won't even bother with anyone over 30 years old. i go for the 23-28 year olds almost exclusively. they have an enthusiasm and zest for life that brings me up, not draggin/naggin me down. i just don't need/want the BS that usually comes with a 30+ chick, especially if she has kids and an ex husband.

You may be right there. This is making me
think....

 

[TooColdUlrick]

Originally posted by NatureGuy
Slickster:

I get what you're saying, and I'm making
a mental note to be more confident in
that way. But I have to be fair to people,
and not assume being nice or approaching
me means anything beyond the supercial.
Let's say you played guitar, and you were able to meet this world renowned female guitarist (ah, Erica Clapton). You'd be thrilled, show alot of interest, and want to know some tricks and so on. But would
it be appropriate if Erica ( lets say she's big, fat, 45 year old, buck tooth) made advances on you?

who cares why she approaches you. afterword you can find out if she has ulterior motives. just don't invest a lot into it initially, until you have a good read on the situation.

again, with me, i HAVE to be patient because various people are always trying to use me. this is why i'm very interested in convo with chicks. i want to know what they're about. very rarely will i go for a kiss before the third date! i guess this is another advantage of my particular situation. i mean, i have to do it this way, for my own protection.

 

[Slickster]

Nature Guy you are getting too analytical here.

Here's the scenario.

You are having a fun and interesting conversation with a chick. You are making her laugh, jokingly insulting her, making a sarcastic observation, whatever. When she's laughing or pretending she's insulted by one of your wise cracks you give her a little nudge or brush her arm.

If she's interested she will reciprocate your touch. It will open up the flood gates and if you don't rush it this type of touching will continue and escalate.

Its part friendly and part flirty. Its safe and low risk. There is really no rejection. She either likes you or she doesn't. Like I said she'll let you know one way or another. Don't force it.

You've never had anything like this happen before?

Sounds like you need to do a search on Attraction and/or Signs of Attraction. Player Supreme had something posted a while back that had a list of different signs to show she's interested. I'm sure there are many others.

 

[TooColdUlrick]

Originally posted by NatureGuy
But how do you separate "buying signals" from the other similar signs in a case like this?
Maybe this is where I have a problem...
I often can't tell the difference, so I assume the former.

very easy...KINO. i say easy, but this is an art more than anything.

if they touch you first, most likely, THEY ARE INTERESTED. give a little back to them and see what happens. NOT on the thighs for christ sake. give it to her hand, arm, or shoulder. if she gives you the same or more back, she's yours to lose. wait the kiss out a little bit--she knows you're interested and shes wondering when and how you'll kiss her. definitely pick the right time to do this.

i always foster an environment for THEM. i almost never initiate, except with subtle verbals, facial gestures, and EC. chicks are very very perceptive about these cues. they are much better at the non-verbals then men are.

i do the sort of mental kino thing. when talking, i'll be thinking, "yeah baby, lets make out..." sometimes, it's like they can read your mind.

 

[NatureGuy]

OK , obviously I need a new approach to these matters. Slickster, I thought I practiced a version of what you're describing, but as I read your description I realize I don't have it quite right.


TooColdUlrick: "mental kino? Sounds a bit mystical !"

 

[PuertoRican_Lover]

Damn Nature Guy, you are making me feel bad --- I'm looking at a 17 year old that is tickling my fancy and I'm 41 - Be a man!!! I will never marry a woman that is old enough to be my wife!!!!

If you can get a 18 year old over a 22year old -- go for the 18 year old -- if it makes you feel better pretend that you atre going after the 22 year old but only 4 years earlier!

 

[NatureGuy]

You may be looking at a teenager, but I'm talking about relationships.
A teenager would be a waste
of my time.

 

[PuertoRican_Lover]

women tend to mature rapidly in their early 20's and are looking for a relationship at a very young age - it is men that do not want it at this age -- women are desperate to marry before 27 and most do or else they start panicking. The younger the chick the better because if she is playing the field - as they say - she becomes a walking sperm bank from all the pimps who have been turning this wh@re out for the last ten years.

 

[NatureGuy]

Good point, but a teenager as you had originally mentioned would to me be basically a child.
Hence my 0 interest.