Confident Persistence vs Cutting Loss

[stonedface]

Hi guys,

Despite reading related articles about the topic, its still quite hard for me to decide which one to choose when the situation arises. Can experienced posters please enlighten me about this?

Thanks a lot

 

[Andy_Dufresne]

You have to consider that women make up their minds about you within 5 minutes of meeting you.

I found this hard to beleive at first when I read it, but after several years on the pro dating circuit this has been field tested and verified as hard fact.

You can be persistent to a point, but if you're banging your head against a brick wall and giving way more than you are getting it might be time to next her.

 

[mikeraw]

Man, you can only be persistent if you're sure there's hope for a relationship to escalate. If you guys kiss early and she puts up some resistance, then I think there's hope, despite what may come out of her mouth. If she constantly shoots you down and turns down your date invitations or opportunities to be alone with her, then cut the losses, IMO.

 

[DavenJuan]

in what scenerios are you referring?

if you are talking about Cold Approaches.. i personally believe that we "cut our losses" way to quickly and give up on opportunities based on our OWN EGO.

as far as "persistamt" confidence.. your GOAL should be to be displaying confidence 100% of the time. your oozing confidence constantly even when you get rejection.

 

[MacAvoy]

It all depends on what you want. You have to decide what is important to you. At times, I'm persistant because I see something as a challenge and I need to prove to myself that I can do it even though deep down, I really don't want it.

Other times, if it has no appeal to me and I just see it as a waste of my time, so I cut my losses. However I think your talking about something specific and without details we can't offer any concrete advice.

I think in your case, you should cut your losses.

 

[Knight's Cross]

Cut your losses when she doesn't counter offer on date ideas. NEVER pursue that which runs from you. Time and again I had to experience this and then internalize it. It's always a lose lose scenario. Once I made the switch, it became easy.

 

[Vulpine]

NEVER pursue that which runs from you.

:yes:
Cutting loss, in the long run, IS confident persistence.

Let me give you an example of a hungry hiker. A hiker is trying to get to a destination by following his particular path. But, at the same time, this hiker is hungry.

Then, off to the side of the trail, he see's a deer just out of range of his weapon. He could run off the path and chase down that deer but that would mean he wouldn't get to his destination as quickly. He would also potentially get hurt or lost, further delaying his progress.

See, by making a poor shot and giving chase, he not only scares off other deer, but wastes time on a deer he might have missed anyway. By weighing his options and passing up that deer (cutting loss), the hungry hiker is able to make forward progress. He can be confident that, if he's passed up one, he'll see more further up the trail. He might find something else that's good to eat, too, like a moose, wild pig, or elk. By confidently persisting ahead, it's likely that he'll find (potentially bigger) prey using the very same trail that he's on, providing for an EASY shot.

Do you see what's different with my analogy?

The idea of confidently persisting ahead toward your destination, not confidently persisting with a woman, is the crucial difference. The goal and focus of your life should never be a woman, it should be on the forward progress. The only constant in your future is you.

 

[Rollo Tomassi]

Excellent analogy VULPINE.

 

[Vulpine]

Excellent analogy VULPINE.

Thanks. Nice new sig, bro.