"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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Confidence and evolutionary psychology

mrRuckus

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http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dunning–Kruger_effect

If confidence implies incompetence, why are women so attracted to it?

I have plenty of ideas, but I'd like to know what you think.




Also, I think this is another reason why you should just fake confidence with all you got: because you have no reason not to be confident because you aren't able to judge accurately whether you should be confident or not anyway.

So stop thinking about it if you lack confidence... the other guys are confident without reason and are successful in life anyway, and if you actually are competent, you are shortchanging yourself anyway. You can come up with a million reasons why you really aren't that good, but be clearly wrong, while over there is the guy you look up to who is less competent than you, but he is probably just too stupid to realize he sucks.
 

“The 22 Rules That Flip the Script With Women… And How You Can Use Them Tonight”

Most guys accidentally kill attraction before they even speak. They assume they need a bigger bank account, a better physique, or smoother lines. They miss the point.

Female desire operates on a specific set of psychological triggers.  Break them, and you're invisible. Follow them, and you become magnetic.

I learned this the hard way. Years of freezing up. Getting friend-zoned. Watching other guys walk away with the girl I wanted. Then I discovered a set of 22 simple rules that rewired my entire approach.

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zekko

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Interesting point.

I don't think women are attracted to confidence really.
Confidence is a fairly complicated concept, as you've noted.

They just want a guy who has some balls. The courage to go do something when it needs to be done. To go kill the saber tooth tiger for supper. To go up to her and make the hookup happen. A man who isn't afraid to take action, and if he is afraid he overcomes it. In other words, the guy who will step up and be a man.
 

Burroughs

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I've experienced this myself. At work I manage over 50 scientists many from India and China with advanced degrees...the ones who are close to me wonder how I got to where I am at such a young age...I tell them connections and good communication skills...they furrow their brows because they realize their years of education will not be sufficient to get them where they want to go.

As to women...how many would have been able to recognize a young bill gates before he made it? (or even after for that matter)...women don't care about confidence or potential...they care about HAWTNESS in the moment and if THEY CAN RECOGNIZE YOU AS FAMOUS...women today are drinking their own azz juices..they have neither the inclination nor the ability to recognize confidence in a man....though don't be a weenie..women sure can pick a loser up in a crowd.
 

Jitterbug

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Interesting to read in the Cross-Cultural Variations section that this appears to be an American-only phenomenon.
 

scrouds

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This really pains me to say, but its time to wean off of wikipedia. Its used at a tool of this current liberal biased society to shape the definitions behind modern discourse.
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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