"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"

I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.

The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.

Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.

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Confidence and evolutionary psychology

mrRuckus

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http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dunning–Kruger_effect

If confidence implies incompetence, why are women so attracted to it?

I have plenty of ideas, but I'd like to know what you think.




Also, I think this is another reason why you should just fake confidence with all you got: because you have no reason not to be confident because you aren't able to judge accurately whether you should be confident or not anyway.

So stop thinking about it if you lack confidence... the other guys are confident without reason and are successful in life anyway, and if you actually are competent, you are shortchanging yourself anyway. You can come up with a million reasons why you really aren't that good, but be clearly wrong, while over there is the guy you look up to who is less competent than you, but he is probably just too stupid to realize he sucks.
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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zekko

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Interesting point.

I don't think women are attracted to confidence really.
Confidence is a fairly complicated concept, as you've noted.

They just want a guy who has some balls. The courage to go do something when it needs to be done. To go kill the saber tooth tiger for supper. To go up to her and make the hookup happen. A man who isn't afraid to take action, and if he is afraid he overcomes it. In other words, the guy who will step up and be a man.
 

Burroughs

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I've experienced this myself. At work I manage over 50 scientists many from India and China with advanced degrees...the ones who are close to me wonder how I got to where I am at such a young age...I tell them connections and good communication skills...they furrow their brows because they realize their years of education will not be sufficient to get them where they want to go.

As to women...how many would have been able to recognize a young bill gates before he made it? (or even after for that matter)...women don't care about confidence or potential...they care about HAWTNESS in the moment and if THEY CAN RECOGNIZE YOU AS FAMOUS...women today are drinking their own azz juices..they have neither the inclination nor the ability to recognize confidence in a man....though don't be a weenie..women sure can pick a loser up in a crowd.
 

Jitterbug

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Interesting to read in the Cross-Cultural Variations section that this appears to be an American-only phenomenon.
 

scrouds

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This really pains me to say, but its time to wean off of wikipedia. Its used at a tool of this current liberal biased society to shape the definitions behind modern discourse.
 

"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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