Components of sustained Interest Level?

[49au]

What are the necessary components of sustained female Interest Level?

a) Physical/sexual attraction
b) Worldview compatibility/same values
c) Emotional connection
d) Provider Value (financial and emotional stability)
e) Social Status


Are just some or ALL or some of these things required (in the context of keeping a woman highly interested for months/years/indefinitely)? And how would these items rank in importance? Or can sustained IL be maintained by physical/sexual attraction ONLY?

I have seen examples where a woman's pure sexual arousal by a man is enough to make her stay with him despite incompatibilities, low value, his life going nowhere, etc. Yet I don't see how this could be a sustainable interest level over the long term.

What do you think?

 

[bigneil]

It certainly starts with physical attraction. Without that they don't seem to notice any of the other things, or if they do it's not enough. Physical attraction gets you an audition. However, the physical attraction never seems to be enough for them - they don't decide the way a guy does that you pass the looks audition so therefore they are interested. Because their interest level will evaporate and/or become obsolete the minute you do the wrong thing (i.e. act needy, jealous or insecure).

"Why, tell me why, did you not treat me right?
Love has a nasty habit of disappearing overnight."

(Lennon/McCartney 1965)

 

[49au]

It's so interesting (and sad!) how we as guys will overlook SO MUCH in a woman if she looks hot enough or fvcks us enough.

Yet we then say that women are the ones who get attached over sex!


Anyway, I think the stock response here is that women lose interest because men get needy/insecure. Of course this is a cause but is it always the cause? Doubtful. I am trying to focus on the bolded questions in the OP.

 

[bigneil]

I agree 49au - I overlooked so many things in my last relationship - and she ultimately left me because she didn't like my shoes.

The boldface items in your OP are all required along with NOT acting jealous/needy/insecure and not saying something "fatal to the seduction" (Louis/Copeland).

 

[49au]

shameless bump

 

[Tiguere]

The only item you need in your arsernal to have your B!tch interested in you until the end of times is YOU HAVE TO BE DESIRED BY OTHER WOMEN.

Make her see that she got competition and she will always be there by your side.

 

[49au]

That cannot be true.

There are plenty of guys getting dumped who are able to go pull new women without a problem. It happens every day and we read about it on this forum.

It happened to me and my ex knows without any doubt whatsoever that it is easy for me attract a variety of women. She was constantly insecure in our relationship. And I can remember four specific times when she met girls I had slept and/or hooked up with. She got extremely upset/jealous in one of these instances because she kept going on about how this girl had the "perfect body" and was so pretty. She also commented about pictures she saw of my prior LTR, who is also very nice looking.

Yet in spite of those things, she ultimately lost interest in the relationship.

 

[DonGorgon]

push push..hot cold absence presence good bad.. random spontanious.. silent that communicate.. great sex

those are the thing you do to keep her Fing you as long as possible it will not stop her from leaving you anyway or form cheating but it will maximize your time frame with her..

 

[st_99]

Two Words: Not caring

The only real way of 'not caring' and therefore being your natural self is to
TRULY accept the risk that she can walk at any time and for any reason and there is nothing you can do about it, nor is it your fault. Not only that but life will be just fine with or without her.

Once you get this mindset ingrained in your head you'll be a winner in this game. You'll be more natural, not nervous, non supplicating, not jealous, free, fun and attractive.

 

[49au]

Once you get this mindset ingrained in your head you'll be a winner in this game. You'll be more natural, not nervous, non supplicating, not jealous, free, fun and attractive.

Good stuff.

I do think in an LTR that there is something to be said for calibrating to her IL and maybe keeping your displayed IL slightly below it. Too far below it and she will walk away because she feels unappreciated; too far above it and you will diminish in value.

But I think that a lot of women leave because "he's just not into me," which is a danger of displaying too much apathy.

 

[st_99]

Good stuff.

I do think in an LTR that there is something to be said for calibrating to her IL and maybe keeping your displayed IL slightly below it. Too far below it and she will walk away because she feels unappreciated; too far above it and you will diminish in value.

But I think that a lot of women leave because "he's just not into me," which is a danger of displaying too much apathy.

And when I say you can't care I do not mean that its ok to be reckless, you can't be reckless but you'll always control the frame with the right mindset and she'll appreciate you for it.

 

[sinnerman]

there is no single way to maintain high IL. sometimes you can do all the right things still IL decreases. But I think social status & physical attraction are the two main must haves.

 

[49au]

I'm sure IL is going to decrease somewhat over a long period of time simply because a couple will get to intimately know each other's unattractive traits and weaknesses.

But I'm talking about the point where IL is decreased to such a point that a woman either leaves or at the very least is very doubtful of staying.

 

[GhostWriter]

Inadvertent jealously.